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Funny Guy

The Funny Guy firmly believes that the key to a woman's heart isn't wealth, good looks, or regular bathing, but rather a great sense of humor.
Girls' BFF

The Girls’ BFF is your BS filter. He’s like a sweet and sour gummy bear. He’ll tell you if “he’s just not that into you” whether you want to hear it or not. But he’ll also give you a hug and tell you that you don’t need that guy anyway.
Chic Geek

The Chic Geek is equally comfortable amongst the hipsters at a Grizzly Bear concert or at home playing Wii Bowling with his friends, or if lucky enough, his girlfriend, on a Saturday night.
Reformed Player

The Reformed Player knows the dark secrets that lurk in the hearts of men, mainly because they’re his secrets too. And he’s willing to reveal all the dirty truths — if it means womankind will forgive him a little for all those times he never called
Wise-Ass

Nobody likes a Wise Ass, right? When the chips are down and you need advice, why bother asking an honest, objective stranger when you’ve got plenty of family and friends to coddle you and tell you exactly what you want to hear?
Mystery Man

Mystery Man will tell you the truth, as he sees it, without the hug.

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September 2010

01

People always tell me to take a chance on love, life and relationships. I try. But I my efforts almost ALWAYS backfire and I end up being burned. As a beautiful, young, African American college girl, are my options slim to none right now, or will my burn streak end?

Can an uncircumcised man orgasm during sex with a condom?

02

Is there a tell or a way that a girl can tell if a guy is in a relationship? because sometimes asking can be very nerve wrecking and awkward when getting to know a guy.

I've been talking to this guy for the last 6 weeks, and about a week ago he tells me he wants to be with me. I replied by saying "Let's see what happens." In the last few days he has not been calling at night, even though we text & talk throughout the day. What's up with that?

I live in Finland and the guys are nice-looking but they seem to be a bit shy. I mean even if I smile to them they seem to be a bit terrified. Should I just go and speak to them?

My BF is acting different. My gut tells me to leave but my hormones tell me to stick it out. Problem is I'm married 9yrs. Hubby is aware of the open relationship. But how do I get the BF to chill and just enjoy!

03

Will a guy not ask a girl coworker out because of fear of getting in trouble in the work place (for sexual harrassment) or is it more of fear of rejection?

I'm a lesbian. So... how much of the advice on this site do you think applies to women who are trying to understand other women in the context of lesbian dating relationships?

Which is worse for a married man to have ... an emotional affair or a physical affair?

i met a guy on vacation we hit it off. come to find out he is form the same city as me. he is comming to see me this weekend one week after we meet. what should i do?

My boyfriend brags to his friends in front of me that I give excellent blowjobs. I have confronted him about this and he says he's only joking. Am i being oversensitive? I find these sort of remarks juvenile and degrading.

06

Girls' BFF, you always have the best advice. Tell me, should I get married to a guy who unconditionally loves and adores me, has always been there for me for the last 10 years through thick and thin, and who will be a wonderful husband and father IF I have zero sexual attraction to him?

07

I was a chubby girl in high school. I started a health kick and am proud to say I am fit and very healthy. Will guys still want to be with me even if I was chubby then?

I'm in college and I feel like everyone is telling me to 'enjoy my years of freedom' and hook up and have sex all the time, and 'make the most of it'. Is it wrong that I just don't want to have sex all over the place just because I can?

what does it mean if you are told you are the perfect heigth

I'm dating this guy who I feel is slightly out of my league. I've seen pictures of his last girlfriend and can't help comparing myself to her. I know there is some attraction or else he wouldn't date me. But he never compliments how I look. Any advice on how to get over the feeling that I'm not as cute as his past gf?

Do most people find their first love in college? If so I'm screwed. I haven't found anyone. Not that I'm looking, but as a junior in college with no first love found yet, I'm beginning to feel lonely and frankly worried.

My sons dad is in a sub/domm relationship with another girl but says he wants his family back. I said yes with the stipulation that he give this other girl up. Am I being a total bitch by expecting him to be faithful to me alone if I become his gf again? He thinks I am.

08

Wise-Ass, can you kick me in the butt for not being able to get over my player? He's now moved to Las Vegas (Player Paradise?), and he's wrong for me for so many reasons.

Is it pointless to date someone who you know you won't marry, but you still enjoy their company, want to get to know them more, and are attracted to them? (and lets pretend for arguments sake that it is an absolute definite that you won't ever marry this person)

I'm a girl who is afraid of commitiment. I work through it everyday, and I really strive toward being a dateable person.Is it best to lay my cards out on the table in the beggining or once it starts getting a little serious?

09

What can I do to make him kiss me more?

How can you meet good guys at a bar?

I've never had a real boyfriend, and at college I found a guy that I like, but I'm not sure if he likes me back. He also has a bunch of friends, and lots of them are girls, so I am nervous to ask him out. What should I do?

My boyfriend just got back from Florida and his female friend wrote on his Facebook wall "I wish I could have gone with you!" He wrote back and said he was going back next semester and she should definitely come along....why is he doing this publicly?!

10

Even after years of marriage does the novelty of the breast wear off? Do you ever get tired of looking at your wife's same ol' breast?

I want to know the rules and regulations with regards to dating your ex-boyfriend's friend? Is anything kosher here or should this sort of romantic rendezvous be avoided (alongside songs like "Jessie's Girl")?

how do i know if my bf is totally into me?

11

Am I too thin? I train horses and work hard every day, so I get an automatic workout, but my boyfriend keeps trying to make me gain weight. I have a D chest, a tiny waist, strong arms, legs, and abs, and a curvy backside, so I'm happy with my body, and I'm NOT skin and bones. Should I gain some weight for him anyway?

12

I'm "dating" a guy i met on the net, but we've never met. We talk on the phone for hours but I'm nervous that when we meet i might not live up to what he thinks of me. How can I talk to him about this?

why is it that every single time a guy buys me a drink he expect me to go home with him, and then acts as if I have broken some sort of contract when I don't?

13

Is it normal to get hung up on the first person to reject you? I'm not pining for him, or anything, but my heart does still kind of jump when I see him.

Is going to a dominatrix ballet class cheating? It would just be about the discipline/structure/catharsis and learning more ballet, especially since I don't find women attractive. I'm planning on asking my bf if it's ok before I go, but I won't do it at all if it seems likely that he'll get mad or not trust me if I ask.

Hey JD..would you consider it stalkerish if I sent her a message? I met a guy online and been dating/sleeping with him 4 a few weeks who has recently friended this hot looking girl on facebook. Can I ask her if she is w/him 2?

Is going to a dominatrix ballet class cheating? It would just be about the discipline/structure/catharsis and learning ballet. I'm planning on asking my bf if it's ok , but I just won't do it at all if it seems likely that he'll not trust me if i ask.

14

I want to wait for marriage to have sex, but my boyfriend doesn't. I'm not willing to give oral sex either. How can we solve this problem? I'm not going to marry him anytime soon, because we just started dating.

If a girl you got pregnant said she didn't want you involved and moved away to a different state so you couldn't contact her or your child. What would you do?

Whenever you see an attractive person, do you find yourself thinking about being with them instead of who you're with now or do you simply think that they are attractive? In other words, is it a bad sign if I'm daydreaming of other guys instead of my boyfriend?

My boyfriend had a terrible accident before he met me and he is still depressed about it. I don't know how to lift up his spirits. We love each other and I don't want to break up, but his depression is starting to push us apart. What should I do?

can i ask my ex what went wrong in our realtionship?

15

Is “I really appreciate you” guyspeak for deeper emotions that a guy is uneasy relating to his gal? What do guys usually mean by that phrase? (I just always assume the obvious; ‘he appreciates you, dummy’). Though, sometimes I feel that it’s code for the in-between phase of ‘I really like you’ & ‘I love you.’ Thoughts?

what does it mean when a guy that you just recently met says "I want to know you" or "I want to know everything about you. Is this code for "I want to know the inside of your pants"?

I am seeking your awesome music matching skills Nick! I am getting married to an awesome guy, but we are having trouble finding the right kind of music to play for the recessional part of the ceremony (after the kiss). I suggested "Wouldn't It Be Nice" but my guy wasn't too sure about it. Help please!

16

What does "half a step above friends with benefits" mean? Would long distance have anything to do with it?

17

what does it mean when your boyfriend says you have a beautiful face?

My boss from just broke up with me because he is stressed with work. What should I do?

After two weeks the guy I'm dating says I'm not "the one" because my face isn't quite what he's looking for. Should I jump ship now or stick around and see what happens? Is this is an "I like having you around but I'm not serious about you" comment?

Do you think it's okay to "block" guys on a dating website that you went out with and then mutually didn't click? I don't bear them ill will but I feel self-conscious editing my profile and being online when they know me "in real life".

I am always complaining about how guys don't like me, and now when one finally does, I am not interested in him! Should just suck it up and date him anyway knowing that this kind of thing only happens to me once every 5 years or so? Or should I hold out for someone I'm attracted to and lose my right to whine about it?

18

Why do Y'all Take So Long To Tx Back

19

How to open up a guy about our insecurities while it's a fact that men are turned off by insecure women? How do we know it's okay to be vulnerable about our insecurities?

I've been dating this hot chick for 6 months now. We're both divorced. Each had a young kid. At the beginning, the sex was really hot. Now we are down to two times per week. We don't live together. I need more, what to do?

My ex and I just "kissed and made up" today. Afterwards, a guy I'm really interested finally got back to me about chilling. If we're not dating, it's okay for me to hang out with both of them right?

20

I'm going into my senior year of college and looking into masters programs. My bf is 23, still living at home and has never had a job. Now he is discouraging me from getting my masters 'cause he'll "miss me too much." Would a keeper really do that?

my boyfriend tells me I'm not fun in bed and that i need to work on improving our sex life. I dont know what to do to improve, how do I make him happy in bed?

O indomitable Wise-Ass...you gotta help me! I'm a college gal whose guy lives at home. One cuddly day, his mom walked in on me straddling his lap. I think she now thinks I'm a hussy. How do I save face?

21

I just started dating a new guy, but I'm still in touch with my ex. The ex and I are still very attracted to eachother, but have committed to a platonic relationship, which...is hard. I'm scared to tell this new guy, but I'll have to eventually. Advice?

22

On Sunday, my boyfriend and I were heavy petting on the sofa while the football game was on. As I reached for the condom, he asked "How do you want it?" I replied with, "Reverse cowgirl so you can watch the game, silly!" No question here, just wanted some props for being such a good girlfriend.

I'll admit I need work: I'm loud, overwhelming, and I talk too much about myself. See, my first sentence was all about me! There's a guy I met at the gym that I've been talking to a bit (a lot) lately though he's far less outspoken. How do I get him talking about himself when we head out for tea after working out?

What does a guy mean when he writes, "I was glad to read your email"?

I've had terrible luck with relationships. I'm only 21, but I've been hurt and used so many times I'm just tired of the games. What's your opinion of online dating websites? Do they actually work? Is it worth it?

23

why do girls always think they're the exception?

Should someone stay in a sexless marriage? If so, for how long?

I recently lost a lot of weight and I'm getting lots more attention from guys than I used to, especially ones I'm attracted to. But I find myself resenting them because I know they wouldn't have given me the light of day 70lbs ago. What should I do?

24

What does it mean if a guy says, "I cant believe I haven't cum yet!" and it's 6am. Is this a good thing or not?

what if a guy tells you that you're fat? does he mean it?

Nick..I've caused an EPIC FAIL. Dating a guy 5 wks. He's a man's man, w/ an ego. We went out Sunday, and he said let's have dinner on Tues. I didn't hear from him by Tues at noon, so I called. And texted. And Emailed. Several times. No reply. I'm really NOT needy, but like him. What do I do to get him back?

Should I not make a big deal about my boyfriend looking at another woman in front of me? For example, we were at church and this woman in front of us stands up and my boyfriends eyes become glued to her butt. Should I let this bother me?

I really like a geeky guy that I meet every couple of months to do geeky stuff with. He's told me that he talks to me more than everyone else put together. I asked him out but he said he had "recently started seeing someone..we'll see how it pans out." Don't think he's had a girl before. So why that response?

26

why is it the man who has to sleep on the couch after a fight?

Hey Rp please help! why does my boyfriend always tell me about other hot girls that he sees/works with? Do you think he feels flattered out of making me jealous?

27

How do guys really feel about a shy woman? Is extreme shyness a turn off or a challenge? thanks.

Hey Girls BFF, you are the hottest guyspeaker! I've been with bf for almost six years now. Things are generally good between us but recently I found numerous affectionate and flirty texts, including pictures in her underwear on his cellphone from an "old friend". Should I work through this or should I ditch him?

I was at a party and the guy that i like was hugging me and telling me how much he loves me and wants to make out with me. I didn't know if it was a joke or not so i said no, trying not to make a fool out of myself. He won't talk to me now.

how do i tell a guy i recently dated and mostly slept with that i have herpes. He finds me intolerable and wont answer my calls.

28

Should you ever post your location of FB statuses in the hope that your crush will bump into you? Or is that too transparent a thing to do? The guy I like is barely ever on FB anyway, but I haven't seen him in weeks, so I'm grasping at straws.

Have you and the other writers of Guyspeak ever met in person or is this strictly virtual?

29

I recently discovered that my boyfriend is always texting his ex-fiancee. They cyber, send nude photos to each other, and every conversation ends with an 'I love you'. Is this cheating?

Why does my boyfriend of six-months constantly brings up that he has a six figure salary? i get it, he makes a lot but why does he constantly have to mention it to me. he doesnt do this with other people, and didnt ever do it with his ex's.

I am in college but I have a problem: I don't drink. Everyone else does and it's seemingly the only way to meet people. What should I do? I've been to enough parties sober to know that they are not fun when everyone else is completely wasted. Thoughts?

I was doodling in my notebook the other day, it turned out to literally be the best drawing I've ever done. I want to show it off on Facebook with all my comics, only I'm afraid this guy who always comments on all my art/videos will see it. It happens to be based on an old artsy pic of his, where he looks so kissable.

30

I love my job, but my fiance wants me to quit when we get married and be a housewife. He is a corporate lawyer so money isn't a problem. I just wonder why he doesn't want me to work. Does it really make a difference in a relationship if I work or not?

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