(This one originally ran last January and got a ton of good feedback. It’s also the kind of list that bears repeating from time to time, so here you go.)
“There’s this guy,” the question always starts, “and he does this and he said that and sometimes he does this other thing,” you continue. Then comes the actual question, one we get at least twice a day, every day:
“Does this mean he likes me?”
Not that it isn’t a valid question. Some guys can be hard to read. Not as hard as women, but still a challenge. Problem is, there is no way to know absolutely if a guy likes you, short of him saying so (and even then he might be lying). Every situation is different, every guy is different, and there are always exceptions.
But here’s the good news: there are things most guys do when they like a girl that can give them away. If a guy does one of these things, it probably doesn’t mean much; if he does 4-5 of them, then there’s a good chance he likes you. Not a guarantee, but a good chance. You just have to know what to look for.
Most of these won’t surprise you. Some might. Consider it a refresher.
He smiles at you. A lot.
He laughs at your jokes, even the crappy ones.
He defends you to others.
He asks questions about you and your life beyond the generic “How you doin’?” or “Good weekend?”
He jokes about dating you.
You catch him staring at you. Your face, that is–if he’s staring at your boobs or butt, it could just mean he’s perving on you.
He’s awkward whenever he talks to you. The first time I talked to my wife, I walked
into a parking meter. Luckily for me, she found it adorable.
He always uses your name when he talks to you. He knows your name and likes to say it.
He calls you by a nickname/pet name.
He asks you to “hang out” some time. (To a guy, the word date can be like garlic to a vampire, so they’ll say “hang out” instead. Whatever you call it, it still means he wants to be around you.)
He calls you on the phone. Most guys hate talking on the phone. If a guy calls you, it means one of three things: you’re his best friend, he needs help with his homework, or he has the itchy pants for you.
He acts more respectable and mature when you’re around.
He compliments your appearance. “You look nice today” is guyspeak for “I’m attracted to you.”
When he cracks a joke, you’re the first person he looks at for a reaction.
He tries go get into the same classes as you.
He asks your friends questions about you. He knows they will probably report back to you, but he doesn’t care.
He touches you, even subtly—a hand on your arm, a pat on your back, a grab of your
shoulders. Humans are naturally drawn to things that attract us—we want to look at them, touch them. If you find a guy’s hand on you, especially more than once, that’s a huge giveaway that he likes you.
He asks you what you think about certain other guys. He’s trying to find out if you like anyone.
He shares an iTunes playlist with you: the 21st century version of making you a mix tape.
He asks your advice about other girls. This one could go either way, but getting your take
on relationships could be his crafty way of finding out what you like and don’t like. Or maybe he’s just trying to make you jealous.
He notices and remembers things about you that most people don’t. Your birthday. What you wore on a certain day. Your favorite TV show. When and where you met your best friend. What you had for lunch yesterday. Average Joe won’t remember that shit, even if you tell him. Hot For You remembers all of it (but if he knows stuff about you that you never told him–creeper alert!).
He asks you out. A no-brainer, yes, but you would be surprised how many times I’ve gotten the question, “This guy asked me out. Is he into me?”
I hope this helps. Feel free to ask the question again. We may or may not refer you to this list.