i would say leave now .. hanging around wishing he'll change his mind, or maybe he'll notice that you are here for him and madly fall for you, probably wont happen.

no need to say i have been there (too obvious? ) and as hard as it seems to leave him now, leaving him later is only harder ..

get ur heart back ,, and move on ..

I have been through this before. I told the guy I was dating that I cared about him and therefore his feelings too, but I have to look out for myself above all. I told him what I was looking for and if he wasn't ready for that kind of relationship "I understood and respected that" but we would have to end it. There is no use in one person being unhappy waiting for the other to change their mind. That usually only happens in the movies. I ended it. It sucked but I knew I was better off. Two months later, I met the love of my life and I probably wouldn't have, if I didn't make myself let go of my current situation so I could be open to finding the man who could give me the love I deserved.
Do your self a favor, and let this one go. He might be a great guy, but he can't give you what you're looking for.

I have been through this before. I told the guy I was dating that I cared about him and therefore his feelings too, but I have to look out for myself above all. I told him what I was looking for and if he wasn't ready for that kind of relationship "I understood and respected that" but we would have to end it. There is no use in one person being unhappy waiting for the other to change their mind. That usually only happens in the movies. I ended it. It sucked but I knew I was better off. Two months later, I met the love of my life and I probably wouldn't have, if I didn't make myself let go of my current situation so I could be open to finding the man who could give me the love I deserved.
Do your self a favor, and let this one go. He might be a great guy, but he can't give you what you're looking for.

I say stay with him for some light fun. Everyone is waaay to serious these days. Not everyone you date has to be a possible future soul mate.

THANK YOU FOR ANSWERING MY QUESTION. i really appreciate it...i always admire your honesty

If a man tells you he is not looking for a relationship, BELIEVE HIM. I met a guy once who said this right off the bat, I wasn't looking for one either, so we dated and had fun. Til he started acting like the boyfriend, saying all the right things, and I fell for him. He said he loved me, he said he cared, but in the end, months later, when he slept with someone else he "wasn't wrong" because he was never my boyfriend. If someone doesn't actually commit to you, like verbalize it, have "the talk" and get on the same page, then keep your heart closed and your options open. It's ok to see him, have fun and enjoy the ride as long as you make sure you fully understand the ride will come to an end eventually.

I am in the same situation. This guy bought me a sentimental gift for my birthday. We went out with friends a few times and he would walk me to my car and kiss me good night. I finally told him that I had feeling for him and then he said he didn't want to ruin the friendship but would rule out stuff in the future. After about a few weeks later we slept together. I am trying to let go, but we are really good friends also.

I guess where you go from here depends on what you want and how long you have been seeing each other. There is no one right answer to your question. However, you being heartbroken tends to imply that one should lean towards ending it.

Possible if you're in the same boat w/ him, which I think you're not, since you mention "totally heartbroken". (IMHO) leave him Dear.

Run, run while you still can. Let's just say that you argue with yourself and take the seemingly easy way out of just sticking around and praying like hell that he'll come to his senses and realize how amazing you are, how you make him laugh, remember his favorite songs by his favorite band, charmed his friends, and know a million other little things about him or ways to make him happy. If he's not ready, none of that will make a difference. And if he's a good guy, he's going to be aware of how unfair he is being to you. Which will make time together bittersweet at best. If he really is a good guy, then he will understand your need to step back and maybe just walk away for a bit while he figures out what's happening in his own head in regards to relationships. Then after a few weeks or months or however long it takes, you two can get back in touch, and have a new start. Or you could stick around and be dissappointed on a weekly if not daily basis that this guy is either not capable or just plain unwilling to give you the kind of committement that would make you happy.

I'd like to hear a man's opinion as they speak a similar language.

My guess is that men are literal and you should believe him. Next you need to choose what you want.

If you really want a serious relationship, then you need to cut your losses now. Find someone who is on the same page with you.

Also, breaking up now might be the incentive he needs to step up his game and see you for the wonderful woman that you are.

Eithier way, you win. Best of luck. Trust me, we've all been there -- and we survived. :-)

Best advice my mother ever gave- never expect a guy to change. Don't go into a relationship looking to fix something or thinking that you can get something out of it that he's not willing to give. That just leads to unhappiness in both parties. The guy you meet is the guy you get.

been reading guyspeak for months now but never posted any comments till now.. this question describes my situation to the T! Guy tells me he likes me as a person but isn't ready for a relationship yet, that i shouldn't limit my options or wait around for him as its not fair on me. This was all said after months of on/off dating and he said he had been a coward all that time for not telling me. I appreciated his honesty and understood where he was coming from but couldn't help but feel rejected and in a way confused to why i couldnt be the girl that he'd want to get serious with.. as the previous comments have advised it is better to get out and move on than delay the heartbreak you will eventually feel if you stick around hoping for him to change his mind.. appreciate his honesty and go find someone who is ready for how wonderful you are!

been reading guyspeak for months now but never posted any comments till now.. this question describes my situation to the T! Guy tells me he likes me as a person but isn't ready for a relationship yet, that i shouldn't limit my options or wait around for him as its not fair on me. This was all said after months of on/off dating and he said he had been a coward all that time for not telling me. I appreciated his honesty and understood where he was coming from but couldn't help but feel rejected and in a way confused to why i couldnt be the girl that he'd want to get serious with.. as the previous comments have advised it is better to get out and move on than delay the heartbreak you will eventually feel if you stick around hoping for him to change his mind.. appreciate his honesty and go find someone who is ready for how wonderful you are!

moving on is easier said than done, but is definitely the smarter option. i was in a similar situation. i was seeing a man who told me in the beginning he wasnt ready for a serious relationship, but i kept seeing him hoping he would realize one day how wonderful i am. after nine months, he found someone he was ready to commit to and it wasnt me. i was beyond devastated. it has been almost nine months and i have not yet fully recovered. i tried remaining friends, but it was just too painful when he would talk about his new girlfriend. get out while you can, it's definitely not worth the heartache.

Get out. I was in the same boat and he decided it wasnt me he wanted to stay with and instead he started to see one of my good friends. After that I couldn't stay friends with either of them, ending things now you will save your self alot of trouble in the long run.

Not wanting to regret and have to wonder what could have been, I chose to stay. He was going through a divorce and told me he really liked me but he KNEW he was never getting married again - he told me to find a nice guy who deserved me. Anyway, I had to go into our relationship without any expectations except we had to cherish each other and our time together or it was over. There were a few bumps but we married 3 years later. In our case it had to be his idea or it was never going to work...