In your guy's case, the wheels started to wobble with the first text and flew off completely with the second one, causing him to crash and burn. Then the poor dumb bastard kept texting you even though he was on fire and dying.
Here's what a normal guy (like me) would do. If I went out with someone and liked her, I would call and leave her a message. Then I would give her a couple of days to answer before I contacted her again--not the very next day, and NOT a text. A phone call, like, two or three days later. Then I would give her another day or two to answer. If she didn't reply by then, I would go over to her house and stand outside her window in the rain wearing a trench coat and holding a boom box over my head that was playing a song she liked. Okay, that's a lie. If she didn't reply after two messages, I would assume she wasn't interested and move on. I would save the boom box move for someone I liked more.
Your guy was already throwing out red flags with the first text. For one, he didn't even give you a day to reply. Second, did you tell him he could text you? I think it's rude to text someone unless they have encouraged you to do so, because a text is more of an interruption than an e-mail or, in some cases, even a phone call. Then he gave you the old "Was it something I said?" line, which is a pathetic thing to ask someone you dated one time and called just the night before. He knows he did nothing wrong; it's a tactic to get you to call back sooner.
You call him creepy, I call him desperate and insecure and socially inept. Whatever you call it, do you want to date it? At best he's a strong type-A personality who wants what he wants when he wants it; at worst he's a sad insecure man who starts to worry if you don't call him back within the hour. Can you tolerate either of those in a boyfriend?
Thanks for the question.
If you really didn't enjoy his company the first time around, yes, let him fall on the creepy side. Otherwise, give him a week or so to redeem himself.
My SO seemed rushed the first time we went on a date, but that was because he was scared we'd have a falling out after he leaves for a trip overseas which was scheduled on the same month we had our first meeting.
I don't know your guy's case, but WA has given you 2 choices to pick on so you can classify him: A) Mr. Type A personality and B) Mr. Insecurity.
sometimes Mr. Type A IS Mr. Insecurity. the most controlling men are the most insecure, and to me these are some red flags of controlling behavior for sure. Cary nailed it, he knew he didnt do anything wrong or he wouldnt have sent the manipulative text asking you such. and, if you are already using the word creepy, my guess is "I like you" has already ended.
oh god... men get crazy sometimes. I had a guy in one of my classes write down my phone number while i was saying it to another one of my friends; he finally used it and called me like 6 months later... three times... after i had literally run away from him during school and sent every other "no" message a woman can send.
But I don't think this means most guys like this are dangerous... usually they're just the extremely socially awkward and don't really "get it".
Sigh.
Haha wow. That's very, very creepy. And never assume that guys like that /aren't/ dangerous, either--they could be! But yeah, most of the time I guess guys just buy into that whole chick-flick notion that if you try long and hard enough, the girl will eventually fall for you. Or...something. I don't know.
But this is not just a guy thing; I know tons of girls who don't know when to let it go with a guy that's lost interest, so they end up looking creepy.
As for the original question, I would say that this situation is doomed. What an awkward, creeptastic foot to start off on. Unless he can prove he just switched meds that day or something and makes a complete turnaround, I'd move on.
all excellent excellent points, i agree whole heartedly. love the meds comment lol i think each of us has had a creeptastic (awesome wordage btw) following us that just got weird at some point. i will never forget the guy i said, to his face, after all not so subtle attempts at signalling my lack of interest had failed -- dude, seriously, i am NOT that into you. and i wont be. i'm sorry but its just the way it has to be. and his response was, oh wow, now i like you more cuz your so honest. seriously banged my head against the wall that night lol and yes, thats exactly one of the reasons men use the phrase "psycho chick" so frequently lol
I had a hard time turning guys down before. Now I realize they just didn't get the "no's" that I had been giving them. I think this is when the line "It's really not me, it's you" comes in.
Loved the boom box-"Say anything" reference. :)
Yes, I laughed my ass off.
Thank you. I wondered if many would get that. My cultural references need to be updated, I think.