There are many reasons why a guy doesn't ask a girl out, but they fall into a five general categories:
-"I Don't Find Her Attractive"
-"I'm Dating Someone Else"
-"My Friend/Family Would Be Upset"
-"It Will Be Complicated Due To Schedule/Distance"
-"She Won't Say Yes"
-"She's Crazy"
Of these six possible reasons, only one has to do with your overall attractiveness or desirability. So you shouldn't immediately assume that the men you like are giving you the cold shoulder because they don't think you're pretty, smart and interesting. It is just as likely that they're dating someone else (or thinking about someone else), or they don't want to upset a friend, or they have a busy schedule, or they think you're indimidating, or they think you're a little crazy.
Regarding that last bit, I'm certainly not saying your crazy. But these men might think you're a bit odd, or 'just one of the guys" or something like that. Please don't develop a complex over it. It's just an option so I brought it up.
In any case, whatever their reason, none of them decided they wanted to ask you out. That doesn't make them bad people and it certainly doesn't make you a bad person. Circumstances and perceptions shape those decisions, and it just seems that in your case with these guys, it didn't work out. Shoud either those circumstances or perceptions change, the situation will change. But if not, you might need to date outside this circle of friends.
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Most guys I know have make the comment they judge how high maintenance a girl is and whether they want to deal with that maybe that's part of the crazy category?).
do you guys not check to see what questions have already been answered? i will add this is a perfectly great answer, however i'm asking for all those women whose questions go unanswered because of dupes like this.
Totally agree. For some reason I think they are new visitors and their questions get to be answered over other people's questions. But, I dislike the fact that the same question gets to different answers. Not fair.
i agree. i hope you are wrong though. i would like to think the loyal readers get first shot at answers, though these days around here one never knows.
Chrissie, people can write in to different guys. Each guys gets their own feed of questions from Guyspeak HQ. If people don't want to see repeat questions, they should direct a question only at one guy!