You are not allowed to freak out if a guy hasn’t called you in a couple days. And this is for your own good. Close your eyes. Imagine a pony grazing on gum drops. Take little breaths. People get busy. They get distracted. You’re not going to wind yourself up over a man not contacting you for two days. Because you’re awesome. You deserve to not be perceived as an emotional flibbertigibbet.
It’s like the reverse of that “48 Hour” dating rule. You know, the rule that says a guy isn’t supposed to call a chick after a date for two days. This is supposed to make the guy seem mysterious, like Zorro. Because, apparently, if you call the day after the date, you’re a desperate stalker. I hate dating rules. The heart is wild. The heart is like that kid in that 80′s movie who wants to dance, even though the principle won’t let anyone dance. Dance, kid, dance! If I get static cling hair from talking to a woman, you can bet I’m going to call her the next day.
But in this instance, invert that silly dating rule. For the sake of your sanity and dignity. Tell yourself that you’re just not going to flip over not hearing from a dude for a quarter of a week or so. You have a life, after all. A life that exists outside of this guy.
As for the rest of your question: this man is married. He falls off the radar for a couple days at a time because he’s still married. “Going through a divorce” is sort of like “on my way to get the donuts.” He doesn’t have any donuts, yet. I’m not judging you for dating a man in the midst of a divorce. But you have to be realistic. You’re not dating a normal guy with normal baggage. Married men have baggage, luggage, carry-ons, and steamers.
Be realistic. If he’s not calling, it’s probably because he’s fighting, talking, or working things out with his wife. For the time being, there’s going to be a sphere of his life you won’t be invited into. You’re going to have to respect that — for his good and yours. This is just how it has to be.
If you can’t deal, then dump him. Believe me, the divorce is worst, if only because it’s not as clean cut as a simple “Yeah, but no. Adios!”