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After dating for about a month, he broke things off with me - he didn't see a future. Now a month later he is asking me to hang out a few times a week and says he misses me? I still like him, but I doubt he wants a relationship just the same as before. What to do?

What is it that you think he wants from you, if not a relationship? Sex? A FWB scenario? Or just very casual dating?

Here's what I'm getting: he dated you, saw no future, dumped you, then decided after a month of loneliness that you were better than nothing. He might miss you, but I doubt his feelings have changed about a future with you. When a guy says he wants to "hang out a few times a week," it usually means, "I want to have sex with you a few times a week with no strings attached."

Of course, I could be wrong. There's always the chance that he simply misjudged his feelings for you and wants another shot. Maybe he thinks there could be a future now after all. There's not enough info here to know for sure, but my gut tells me that's not the case. My gut thinks he's after some tail. Whatever kind of setup he wants, know that it will end the moment he finds someone he's really interested in.

If you're comfortable with a loose, no-strings-just-fun kind of relationship, then go for it. There's nothing wrong with that. But if you're looking for a serious boyfriend, someone to fall in love with, this isn't the guy. He dumped you once, and he will do it again.

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5 Comments

Daisy

I agree. I wouldn't pin much hope on being with this guy. After only a month he didn't see a future with you? A month is a pretty short time, relatively speaking. He changed his mind about being with you rather quickly, and I think he's likely to do it again. He's looking for someone else. I say tell him goodbye and let him keep looking.

nikitamaagel

Read "He's just not that into you". If he wants you back, he'll say it loud and clear. If not, let him miss you and as hard as it is, don't give in. He's the one who dumped you. You're not a consolation prize.

nikitamaagel

Read "He's just not that into you". If he wants you back, he'll say it loud and clear. If not, let him miss you and as hard as it is, don't give in. He's the one who dumped you. You're not a consolation prize.

user-pic

This exact thing happened to me. The only reason I gave the guy another shot was because he'd had a ton of personal issues going at the time we dated and he said that's basically why he ended things. He was very apologetic, talked about how much he missed me, said he wanted to start over with a clean slate, etc. What he really missed was getting laid. It only took a few weeks before he said "I don't think we're going to happen". If you like this guy at all and it'll hurt your feelings when he decides he's officially done I'd take a pass.

user-pic

This exact thing happened to me. The only reason I gave the guy another shot was because he'd had a ton of personal issues going at the time we dated and he said that's basically why he ended things. He was very apologetic, talked about how much he missed me, said he wanted to start over with a clean slate, etc. What he really missed was getting laid. It only took a few weeks before he said "I don't think we're going to happen". If you like this guy at all and it'll hurt your feelings when he decides he's officially done I'd take a pass.

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