For a committed relationship, I can think of only one situation offhand where I'd say it was OK to take him back.
If he was seduced into cheating on you while blind drunk or otherwise mentally incapable. And it would have to be "She was actively chasing him" not "He got drunk and chased her" to rate that.
Then again, I am pretty unforgiving about cheating either way, purely as a betrayal of trust.
It happens. When 25% of married men and 17% of married women admit to being unfaithful, it is a pretty poor look out for the non married relationships.
Every one of us gets questions asking why guys cheat and what to do, especially poor Panama for some reason! Check out his archives for a lot of advice on that. And definitely click that link to Panama's post - it is rock solid advice. No use me reinventing the wheel here!
The thing is, it is your relationship. We can give you advice, sure, but in the end it is down to you. Your choice to forgive or not, not mine, not his, not the readers. Just yours.
I guess if you’re ok with wondering where he is, what he’s doing & who he’s doing it with. You can forgive him, but don’t go get brainless & forget what he did to you. He obviously didn’t care about you when it was going down. You want to give “that guy” a second chance? The one who pi$$ed all over your feelings, hope, love & trust you had in him? Hey, go for it! MM will be here for you when he does it again. Good luck with that…..
I'm with you silky. That's the most unforgivable unacceptable thing. I'm zero tolerance - cheat or lie to me once and I'm gone. No desire whatsoever to relive past mistakes.
It would be hard to forgive, and impossible to forget, but I think I would take someone back under those circumstances too. Depends on many things.
Mystery Man, how do you feel about dating someone who's cheated on another SO before (once)?
Tricky one. If he actually told you he had cheated, it might be worth a cautious try. Guys can change - well, sometimes.