After a quick and informal poll of a few friends, 11 to 15 is about the time we all started using porn. That is both guys and gals.
Also, the thought of watching porn with our Dad filled us all with horror and revulsion - you just don't do that, it is gross. The fathers I know thought the reverse was true too - the thought of watching porn with your son is uncomfortable. Far better to watch a decent movie together, then give him some privacy with the dvd player.
Your brother will already be looking at porn. A quick look at his browsing history (Note: don't do that. 14 year old boys take their privacy VERY seriously indeed) would show you that. Assuming he is a normal, healthy boy, he understands the difference between fantasy and reality, and that what is on the screen is no more real than dragons or pokemon.
In this case, I am gonna say you are being way too over-protective, unless your Dad is into some seriously freaky stuff. However, you are a touch worried. Fair enough, it just shows you are a pretty decent big sis.
Talk to your Dad (assuming the two of you are talking) and ask him to give your brother "the porn talk." He'll know what you mean, grumble and mutter, then do the talk anyway. That is the sort of thing that should come from the father figure. If you or your Mom try, your brother will just ignore you and get PO'd that you are up in his biz.
Do you know for certain they actually watch porn together? Just because the dad has it there doesn't mean they are both watching together. My old man and my friends' dads all had porn hidden (pre-internet days), but never watched (or looked at) it with our parents. Indeed when we got caught we usually got a scolding.
Otherwise I wouldn't worry about it. It's normal to be curious and porn to a young teen has the "forbidden fruit" element about it. None of us even had "the porn talk", (not even sure what that is lol) and most of us turned out just fine - unless being scolded WAS the porn talk.
MM is also definitely right about not being nosy, you mean well, you're obviously a very caring sister, but snooping out of concern will not be received well by your little brother.
I don't think she means that they watch it together, just that since the dad lives there alone and has porn, her brother is able to access it without looking very hard.
That's the impression I got from the question too.
Mine as well.
What is the "Porn Talk?" Or at least the gist of it? I'm a girl so I never got it...
I'm a man I never got the 'talk' either; the only time my parents "talked" about porn was when I got caught with porn mags (which sadly was often) and got a really bad chewing out and shouting at.
Must be some kind of new thing by young parents now.
I think the porn talk is referring to talking to your kids about how porn is not reality. And that what is shown on the screen is not how sex between two adults not being filmed actually occurs. That sex is something serious and the decision to have sex should not be taken lightly at that age.
At least that's what I'm assuming, since I don't have kids.
Wait - none of you know the porn talk? Jlove is closest.
Pfft - parents these days.
haha back then, we all knew it was just performance for the amusement of the audience - even as young teens, no one needed to tell us anymore than we needed to be told Star Wars was just a movie.
I guess though we had the "talk" but it was more like yelling, about the corrupting and harmful effects of pornagraphy and how it will ruin us for the rest of our lives.
Thanks mm, that helps. And for the record, they definitely would not be watching together. I appreciate the input, everyone!