No, he certainly doesn't think about her feelings. After a guy bails on a girl he only thinks about either or both of the following:
1) Is she going to be trouble? By "trouble" I mean, will she call, text, harass or stalk me? Will she stand outside my window at 4 am yelling my name? Will she send her big brother to come beat my ass? Will she show up at every bar, restaurant or concert I attend for the rest of my life? Will she throw acid in my face?
and/or
2) Will I ever get to hook up with her again? Have I put in enough "work" with her so that should I want to come back somewhere down the line, I can march right back in and start back where I left off?
Sorry to the guys out there for revealing the ugly truth, but the ladies want to know.
Once I seriously got this excuse from a guy I was seeing in the Navy: I dropped my phone overboard.
Honey, just move on.
This guy is a marine. Might there be sweeping generalization in the midst?
Wow, really? That kind of sucks. Just one more thing to make me glad I never dated...
Wow... many more answers like this and I might have to find a nice woman to settle down with
Wow...I was in that exact same situation, and I always wondered what I did wrong, so I let him go; turned out he came back. There are times, though, I'm afraid he's going to do it again, but I try not to question it so much because he's here now.
How long was he gone for before he came back? Why did he leave to begin with?
He and I knew each other 2 years prior dating and we talked on and off, but is was usually a small "hello". After we started dating, he was gone for 2 months (to me, 2 months CAN be a long time). It's a complicated story, but it did have to do with another lady; ex-girlfriend. Which I had to find out myself, only because I finally saw him with her. Now, I'm not the jealous type, so when I confronted him, I didn't go crazy psycho bitch on him, I just asked plain and simple, "Is there something I should know?" After that, he was honest, but he was still AWOL from my life because of his situation with this lady. So I let it be...and eventually, he came back. Is he still with her you make ask?....I don't know...and I have a feeling he isn't, but like I said...he's here with me now.
For sure I'm moving on. At least there were some good times. Thanks all!
Oh, Mystery Man. Who wronged you to make you so bitter? Mystery Lady, perhaps?
Most guys do feel remorse when they hurt someone. Specifically the ones who aren't creepy sociopaths. Forget this guy ever existed and move on. The less you worry about him, the more you'll be open to meeting someone who will treat you with respect. Good luck!
Dear Nick,
Thank God you're on here or I'd die a slow death, suffocated by cynicism and disenchantment. You keep the hope alive.
Sincerely,
Meiggs
Aw, thanks. Don't give up hope!
As a rule, beleive the opposite of what MM says.
Hell yeah they think about it. I grew up with mostly males...most of them being complete assholes in the same regard as the fella in your situation. They absolutely think about you after they've dicked you over. However, they usually think about you the most after THEY have been screwed over by some whore...that's when they start thinking, "Man, maybe I shouldn't have been such a lame-ass-dick-face that one chick...she would have been a better choice than cum-slut-Patty." Sucks that it's always in retrospect, though!
im in the same exact boat, only we only liked each other for a month! i was thinking of asking him why things just stopped all of a sudden but after reading this post, i realized my value is worth so much more than that! time to move on to greener pastures. thats the saying, right? hehe.
Very true, Mystery Man. Thanks for shedding the light!
Guys do think about it sometimes after about two years of leaving my first alone he came up to me at my job and told me he apologizes for hurting me and that he is apologizing to all the females he has hurt in the past. That meant so much to me because that was all I ever wanted from him was an apology. But that was a rare situation don't expect that to always happen. I think he went through a life or death experience because he started telling me how he gave his life to god. So I have to agree with dpain it's usually when they go through something themselves they start to think about girls they did wrong.
Whoa, whoa slow down ladies.
Not all guys disappear completely when they break up. That was the assumption presented with the question.
Generally if a guy just up and disappears from a girl's life, MM is right. He's thinking one of those two things. (Assuming it was intentional of course, if he was forced there are all kinds of things that could be going on.)
If a guy completely disappears its likely that he feels that he didn't do anything wrong so he has no reason to feel remorse.
This doesn't mean that average joe is the same.
Average joe does think about girl's he's wronged if he realizes he's wronged them and then it's often a huge internal conflict of do I bring it up and let her move on.
Some dude that just disappears, obviously doesn't think he did anything wrong. He's making a "clean break" from what he thinks was an unhealthy relationship, this doesn't mean he's right, it just means he thinks it's beyond amends or he didn't do anything wrong.
Oops, I meant "huge internal conflict of do I bring it up _or_ let her move on."
Sometimes, we guys think certain things are better left alone. Sometimes this is for selfish reason because we don't want to deal with it, sometimes it's because we think the other person will be more hurt by us bringing it up again.
Honestly you all got to read why men date bitches. You learn so much from this book. Simply do not wait on no one....
Whoa, whoa slow down ladies.
ugh....lose the condescension.
What a lovely day for a 4353257! SCK was here