DEAR EVERYONE: "Hey, you seem nice/I'd like to get to know you, would you like to go out for coffee sometime?" There. Done. Nobody in their right mind is creeped out or turned off by that. If someone looks down on you for that, they're not mature enough to have a relationship.

BTW, regarding the asker's age: This one guy my friend wanted to introduce me to, he refused to just call me- first he had to stalk me on facebook and leave comments on things, and then "poke" me, and then message back and forth before *I* finally called *him*. He is 24 years old. (He ended up acting kind of douchey when we did go out also.)

i honestly didnt get your answer sorry!

Yeah I'm a bit confused by his answer as well. Should girls play hard to get or not?

Anonymous: Um. Basically, he said no.

In my opinion, I prefer when guys don't offer it all up at once, ie: Constant calls, texts, terms of endearment, etc. too soon. I guess that means that I like to "play the game". But honestly, I dont know one guy who likes a girl who meets them, and wants to be their girlfriend the next day. And a lot of the girls I know seem to think that when you first meet a guy that youre interested in, if you dont see him at least 5 times within the following week (after meeting/exchanging numbers) that means the guy doesnt like them. HELLO!!??

So if the asker thinks of "playing hard to get" as NOTconstantly calling or texting a guy they JUST met.. then yes. Play hard to get. Be honest, but not pushy. If he's in to you, he will make the effort!

what, her question's not valid just because she's under eighteen? not cool swaim...

........

I'm with the two confused people above. I had to read this twice before I could even figure out what your point was, Swaim.

It seemed like you were trying to explain that guys do not play hard to get, which was not what the asker wanted to know. Why did you avoid answering the real question?

I'm in agreement with her. Guys seem to be automatically turned off by a girl who's "too available". They say we want what we can't have, but that applies so much more heavily to chase-loving men. It really DOES seem like the only way to catch their attention is to pretend to be aloof - in other words, play mind games. And then when we DO play said games, guys call us psycho and ridiculous. MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MINDS.

yes, men are simple and totally averse to games. that's why, if you really like a guy, it's necessary to calculate how soon you can sleep with him without him throwing you over. oh, and the limits on how much emotion you can express without terrifying him. if you just tell him straight out what you're thinking he'll think you want to marry him! and you can only text/call exactly x times in a specific time period before you're a freak that no one will ever love. that's also why he texts you that he loves you while he's hitting on another girl. that is totally not a game. at all. that's why girls are always worried about someone lying to them just to ensure there's poon in their future. don't forget to be coy and waiting for him to ask you out is appropriate but if you ask him out it's confident. unless he's all about the chase (NOT A GAME).

This is what (recently) worked for me:
Let him decide whether to follow up on the signals you send. That can be as subtle as flirting with him, as simple as letting a friend or a sibling pass on the info, or as brash as saying, "Oh my God, I think you're awesome."
I used all three. And he really is hot!

I am the asker....25 years old and usually date older guys in late 20s, early 30s. I still find guys, and yes maybe idiots, that play the games.

I am the asker and 25 years old. The guy that seems to be playing games with me is 27 years old.

It seems to me, that just about all men, young & old, are turned off by females that text them "too much"... what that actual magic number is, is anyone's guess!! It's sad because females want & crave the emotional closeness, fondness, affection, sharing, bonding, etc... not all want "love".... and men seem to be SET on auto pilot 'robot' mode and continue to put one foot in front of the other, regardless that they could be making a gallactically stupid mistake in going in the direction of their presumptions. We women continue to suffer because of it and they do to. I am a highly sexual, affectionate, confident woman and I've found that even in my 'up front' honesty mode of " I dont want a husband, boyfriend or any other kind of relationship from you, but a good bonking", most will STILL RUN... now explain that one! The sad truth is men seem to be unable to train their brains past the hunt & CONQUER phase. If they know from the get go, that you are unconquerable, it's as bad as texting too much. Lame, lame, lame... It's unjust. So this player is all about putting my game face on... it's time to play ball .... Batter up!

Agree to disagree. Everyone plays games. I do that now to this day. More in my younger years. It keeps things interesting, most of the time it's childish, sometimes it's just plain stupid but we all do it because we need some kind of affirmation that we are indeed wanted and desired. I'm playing a game now with my long distanced relationship. I haven't seen him in 5 weeks and we text and talk everyday about how badly we wnat to see each other but he's too busy for me to come see him and for him to come see me. We undoubtly love each other, I have no worries about that or him seeing someone else and etc. He took a leave of absence from work and I had quit my job a few months back and we traveled the world together. But it's been 5 weeks since we've seen each other!!! I offered to fly over to see him but he said he wanted to come see me instead. So we planned to meet where I live next weekend. However he just told me two days ago he can't come because he's too busy and he didn't want to take too much time off just coming back to work. Understandable...if he hadn't texted me last Thurs to say he was flying back to his family and friends for a 3 day weekend!!! So I keep thinking to myself...what a d-bag?!? Does he really want to see me or miss me at all? I know he does but I keep thinking he's a j-ass. So I got in my passive agressive mode and texted him last night I will have my phone off and busy for a few days and will talk to him next week. Give him a taste of his own medicine. See? Everyone plays games. We play them to find results and answers and it only gets us more confused.

if you really want a SIMPLE answer, yes. yes they do. I'm a female, and all the boyfriends i'v had in the past become super attached if i don't call to their needs all the time, i play the game well though, too. it especially works BEST if your playing hard to get with a guy that's hard to get, you both are playing the game here, and are simply more attracted to eachother. but remember, not all guys like girls who play the game, but i'm just putting my opinion out there that MOST of them do. okay, hope that helped :)

I am hard to get, and I love it when a guy goes crazy that he cannot touch even my hair after, say, over a year. It's wonderful to make them go bonkers!!!!!

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