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Do guys really think about other women during sex? Why?

Have you ever been caught in a rainstorm while thinking about sunshine?

Have you found yourself eating cereal, but thinking about filet mignon?

Have you ever looked at your sweater and thought maybe you should have worn the blouse?

Have you ever been on a bus and wondered if taking the train would have been more fun?

OR, Even trickier, but true: The reverse.

Have you ever been on a beautiful beach yet missed your apartment?

Ever bite into a gourmet cheesecake but crave a Twinkie?

Ever get 20 minutes into an Oscar nominated movie, but wish you were watching that Drew Barrymore flick.

Ever have sex with a smooth talking Hercules but find yourself thinking about your lovable pudgy ex?

This just be our nature.

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21 Comments

user-pic

great answer! :)

user-pic

Ouch! This answer really makes me sad to think about. It means the guy isn't enjoying ME while we're together, and wishes he were with someone else. That hurts.

user-pic

Take comfort in the fact that every person is different. What is true for one, is certainly not true for another. I've talked about this with my partner. I accidentally fantasise about other people, and he doesn't. And he genuinely doesn't. It's not something that would upset me, and he knows that, so he'd tell me if it were true.

grayeyeddame

Good answer, yes... Ouch, yeah I agree... it doesn't hurt as much to think about him thinking of other women but that the comparisons were so harsh:
rainstorm vs sunshine
cereal vs filet mignon
apartment vs beach
twinkie vs gourmet cheesecake

My name is Kelly, I am cereal but some people really really love cereal, and I'm ok with that lol if the guy I am with doesn't like cereal he wouldn't have it so many days in a row... if he wants to think about Filet Mignon I can handle it, if he goes sniffing around a menu he's going to be in some pain for a while!

seriously though why couldn't it have been strawberry ice cream vs chocolate ice cream or something? heh

user-pic

Hey kelly, i agree but in amits defense: i guess the thing is all things are subjective, of the top ones i only got cereal / fillet minion (but i'm vege so that cancels that out lol), the others i thought they are equally as good, rain / sun i love them both, bus / train i like them both and yours... strawberry / choc i love them both but some people might automatically assume the one was much better and still get offended, damned if you do damned if you dont...

grayeyeddame

good point lol

user-pic

Dont worry, we think of other men we'd rather be fucking too.

user-pic

Yeah I really try not to...
But it's definitely happened!

aspiringgeekygirl

I would rather he thought about me whilst we fucked.

user-pic

The bottom line is both sexes do it...we think about others whether willingly or not. Sometimes it just happens, the person you are with does something that reminds you of someone you were previously with, get over it!! It's called trust... trust in yourself to be with the person you want to be at any given moment and trust that just because you BOTH fantasize occasionally about others doesn't mean your relationship is doomed...we are only human!

Bibonoshoes

Might sounds weird, but except when it is REALLY bad sex, I don't think about anything, except focusing on my body and the way it reacts to each and every move of my partner..And what I can do to make him enjoy doing it with ME even more..

user-pic

I'm guilty of doing this and I'm female. I say whatever gets you off. Just because he's thinking about someone else doesn't mean that he doesn't care about you whilst he's screwing you. Thinking about someone else can be that much hotter. But then I'm not so insecure that I find sexy thoughts about another sexy person threatening. Mainly because I understand that we're all human.

Caitlin

I totally do this, too!! All the time! I mean, it's not happening the whole time, but... why not?? I'm sleeping with one guy for the rest of my life. Sometimes, that's just the way to keep things different and exciting... other times, we find our own new and exciting things to do.

user-pic

I'm guilty of that and I'm a girl. It's hard not to think about someone you miss and would rather be with..isn't that human nature in general?

user-pic

Your thoughts are yours alone, the one private place that only you are privy to. No one gets a say in or control of anyone else's thoughts. So let him think what he wants, and you think what you want. Let's have no Thought Police here.

user-pic

Several guys I had I only thought of one at that present moment when intimate. I loved my previous bf and sex was great, but I find myself even stronger in love with the present one and definitely have no thoughts of the previous ones. I live in the present moment when intimate, enjoying the closeness with the one I'm with and enjoy the connection, touches, experimintation, etc. I dont und'd the idea of fantasizing about others when you two are alone, unless you are together just for the heck of it, without real feelings for each other. And I dont like comparison of food and relationships. Food is food. Relationships are relationships. If a man or woman are thought in terms of food I find there are not enough feelings there in the one who fantasizes about different "apple". A flash of memory can come when triggered. But fantisizing is different. If you are with one and fintasize of another, you probably long for that "other".

user-pic

Several guys I had I only thought of one at that present moment when intimate. I loved my previous bf and sex was great, but I find myself even stronger in love with the present one and definitely have no thoughts of the previous ones. I live in the present moment when intimate, enjoying the closeness with the one I'm with and enjoy the connection, touches, experimintation, etc. I dont und'd the idea of fantasizing about others when you two are alone, unless you are together just for the heck of it, without real feelings for each other. And I dont like comparison of food and relationships. Food is food. Relationships are relationships. If a man or woman are thought in terms of food I find there are not enough feelings there in the one who fantasizes about different "apple". A flash of memory can come when triggered. But fantisizing is different. If you are with one and fintasize of another, you probably long for that "other".

Jasmine-Jane

I really hope my partner doesn't do this! I think it would destroy me, as I put so much into how everything feels for him, and to know he's thinking about someone else would just break me, especially as it's "making love" to both him and me.
Many people don't have a problem with it or think about someone else - but I honestly don't. Is anyone else like me?

sandmanda

I am. I've been with my present boyfriend for three years. It may be because he was my first, but I only think about him. We have great sex, and I'm very concerned with making him feel good. I also would be crushed if I knew he was thinking/fantasizing about someone else. :'(

sandmanda

This.....didn't make me feel any better. XD But thank you for the honesty.

sandmanda

I am. I have been with my present boyfriend for just over three years. It may just be because he is my first and I am his, but I only think about having sex with him, during the deed or otherwise. And I think about sex A LOT. I'm kind of a horn dog. XD I work really hard to make sure everything feels good to him, and that I try new things. He's always said he's very satisfied. If I found out he was thinking of other people, I'd be completely and utterly crushed.

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