Welcome to adulthood.
Yeah, it is exactly the same for guys too. Make sure you have some space of your own. It helps.
See you tomorrow at the guyspeak liveblog. all your short questions answered as wittily and bitterly as possible.
Mystery Man
Copyright 2012 WE: Women's Entertainment LLC. All rights reserved.
I definitely understand where you're coming from, it happens to all of us. As long as you stay in tune with yourself to know that these are just the normal relationship up and feelings, you'll be fine.
I wish the best of luck you and your man!
I feel like this today.
Maybe we do it because we don’t want a deju'vu of a bad relationship. Who knows….
I get this too.. I feel like if he doesn't tell me he misses me during that time that he doesn't care/want to be with me. Then I end up being ridiculous and use passive-aggressive techniques to make him come to me, or make him feel guilty by acting like I don't care either.
I don't completely get why I do it.. We both love each other very much, and when we're together I don't feel this way. I guess I'm still scared of how much I love him and how losing him would hurt like hell..
I think if we're honest, most of us (especially those who've been hurt) are this way at some point or another. That is, clingy, needy, the two things that seem to turn men off the most!! The thing that has helped me A LOT in the past when I feel this way, is to make sure I take time to do things for myself, either with friends or on my own. Healthy relationships, in my experience, MUST involve two autonomous people each with their own interests and sense of self.
Fran, I completely agree with you, re: healthy relationships. I typically only get that clingy needy feeling once a month when hormones are out of my control, but other than that I am never clingy, I love having my own interests and I SERIOUSLY value my alone ME time. The guy I'm seeing right now, though, I feel like he'd be happier with me if I liked everything he was into and there's just some stuff I will never be interested in (even after trying). Then I worry he'll get bored with me eventually so I just take it easy and not get too attached just yet.. and that's a whole different topic lol..
I went on vacation with my sis a couple of years ago and she forced me to read 'Men are from Mars.." I had never read it, thinking it was some kind of hoaky nonsense. BUT it really made sense! All that stuff about men being like rubber bands, needing to stretch away before they can get closer.
I guess really, though, we all need space sometimes. Even though we don't always realize it at the time.
I don't know. I read it, finally, about a year ago.
It was OK, but some of the stuff just stuck me as a guy trying to find excuses for his behaviour in relationships. Some of the reasoning was spot on, sure, but some of it was so ridiculous it was almost funny. Nearly as bad as that PUA advice guy - what is his name again?
Thanks, JLove!
story of my life- don't worry, it's pretty normal for men AND women =)