You've totally hit this one, Cary! My BF and I go 50-50 when we go out. If we eat out twice in one day, one will get lunch while the other gets dinner. No squabbling about whether or not one is paying more than the other that day....we just do it. Biggest thing was we even did that while I was unemployed last year, and this year since he's lost his job--we just do everything on a smaller scale.

Listen to him, Ms. Moneybags.....either have your guy step up, or let him know you're gonna step out of the relationship, because all your current arrangement is going to do is add a LOT of resentment to your relationship.

Seriously - is chivalry dead? What a turn off. We go 50-50 in my relationship even though I have more money. If my bf made me pay for everything all the time I would think him less of a man. Harsh, but even though I can treat myself to whatever I desire with my own money - I like to be taken out, wooed, wined and dined from time to time. (Don't get me wrong I do take my man out too). Regardless of how much you have in he bank, someone - anyone who freeloads or rides on your coat tails is not worth having around. Who wants a kept man? Ew. The fact that he is using the line "you are earning more money than me" is so whiny. AND irrelevant. Maybe he should starting making more if he can't afford to eat out or do things as a couple. If he paid your way through college kindly thank him, tell him how much you appreciated it, but explain that you have paid your dues and are no longer "indebted" to him and in fact- had you have known that he would have thrown this all back in your face you would never have asked or expected him to pay in the first place. Go find yourself a gentleman.. of the few that still exist.

In my situation I had met my fiance while she was still in Medical School. I was already a working Police Officer at the time and making pretty decent money so she lived in my apartment and I paid for everything, including nights out, while also supporting my daughter. I even helped her with some payments for school. She has just finished her residency and now makes a little more than twice what I do so we agreed that she would cover certain costs in the future. Not that it really matters as we share a bank account and everything, so it really could be my money being spent as well haha but we both have a high respect for what is fair. The point is, we discussed it, worked it out, came to a conclusion that worked for both of us. I suggest you do the same so one partner doesn't feel used.

At the same time, there is a debt there. As a person I could never be helped out with school or my living expenses without feeling the overwhelming need to pay the person back however I can. Even if it is just keeping the place clean and making dinner or something. In my situation my fiance was busy 24/7 and on call many days. So I paid for everything, made all dinners, and helped pay for her school while also raising my daughter, oh, and I also paid her car insurance. Was that my choice? Of course, and I would do it again. But appreciation is pretty mandatory in that scenario. To just say 'Thank you' and then say 'Okay, I am on my feet now making twice what you do. let's go Dutch.' is pretty disrespectful. In my scenario the only reason my fiance is on her feet is because I was there to help her (she says this, I am not making some grand ego filled comment).

It frustrates me to see people discuss a relationship and dismiss how much time and money a person puts into it. It is a burden on the person paying for all those years, but they do it because they love you. Once you are on your feet you do owe a debt to those who got you there. To pay for everything is wrong, but to complain about having to pay for everything when he may have spent thousand of dollars over the years seems petty and somewhat disrespectful. Then again, I am the kind of person who pays his parents back for raising him. So I probably have a pretty skewed perspective.

The easy solution is going out to a place he can afford. Like going out for pizza or coffee. You're probably self conscious about talking about money (I know I am), but if he won't even pay for that, tell him how rude he's being and if he won't change, dump him.

Next time, just pay for yourself, not him. If he still pulls the "You make more money!" card, then explain that if he wants to save money, he can go without, but that he shouldn't expect you to do something he's unwilling to do, i.e., pay for the date.

My boyfriend is pretty short on money, too. But he still pays for me every chance he gets. In turn, I'm happy to pay for him if I need to. The only issue there is he's had it so engrained that the man should pay, so he gets a bit uncomfortable with me paying. And a lot of the time we settle for each paying for ourselves.

I could understand if your boyfriend TRIED to pay for you but just couldn't afford to. But it sounds like he just kind of expects that you'll pay by now and doesn't even bother.

I once had a (terrible) boyfriend who would invite me out on dates - even tell me to get dressed up nicely - and then take me out to expensive restaurants. Money was scarce for me at the time and he knew that, so I always thought he was inviting me out with the intention to pay for us both. When the bill would come, he would expect us to go 50/50, which in itself was unfair considering he would order much more (and more expensive!) than I would.

I'm not placing any blame on the OP. But I wonder if maybe, since she makes more money, she is unwittingly going to places that are within her budget but out of his and expecting him to pay? I know this is a stretch but still something to think about...