I feel like I answer a question like at least once a month. On purpose. Look, if you already know it may be the biggest mistake of your life, then you are just looking for somebody else to tell you not to go.
So here goes...
...don't go. When you say "commit" you clearly mean "get engaged" because if you've been together for 3 years then the commitment is already there. Now, the fact that he's talking about epiphanies is beyond me. That would be the red flag I needed NOT to move with him without more of a guarantee (engagement ring) that you all are in it together.
There are some risks in life worth taking. This just might not be one of them.
Wonderful.
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It sounds like to me he just not into you enough or he isn't emotionally available. Three years should be enough to know whether you are long term material. If it were me I would him go and find a guy who realizes what a catch you are.
i agree with BFF and the other commenters here. although to be fair BFF, the biggest mistake of her life could also be a reference to a mistake that involves losing the guy. these in between stages are so hard sometimes, arent they? well, look at it this way, as obvious as it sounds, one of two things are going to happen here no matter what you decide. you will either stay together long term, or break up forever. so what's the worst that could happen if you gave him an ultimatum? a breakup sad yes of course, but at least if this worst case scenario happened, you wont be moving forward with something that would have ended up breaking your heart in an entirely different state. doesn't need to be aggressive or confrontational. just let him know before you make a commitment like that you need a bigger one from him too. you're allowed to ask that.