Sorry to hear that. Lots of that going around and it sucks. I read an article once that compared a man's feelings after losing his job to how a woman feels when she learns she is infertile. Despite being completely sexist and an insult to infertile women, the statement does hint at how devastating it can be to lose a job, whatever your gender. Some say men tend to have their egos and self-worth wrapped up in their work more often than women, but I'm not willing to make such a blanket statement.
The main thing you can do for your guy is just be there and listen. This might sound silly but I believe that people who lose a job have to grieve that loss as they would any other (though to a lesser degree of course than, say, a death). He'll be angry, he'll be sad, he'll be hurt and confused, and, hopefully, he'll want to express those feelings. All you have to do is listen and support him and let him express himself. Some of us rush to cheer people up with platitudes ("You'll find another job, don't worry") but we forget that they just need to be heard first. The advice can come later; all he needs now is affirmation: "I know it hurts." "I don't blame you for being angry." "Yes, it is incredibly unfair."
If he tends to hold his emotions in, you might try to get him to talk. That stuff needs to come out or it will eat him up inside. I'm not saying you should bring up the subject, but if he starts talking about his job loss, listen and ask questions and encourage him to express his feelings (without actually saying "Express your feelings" because that will make a guy clam up!).
Be patient with him, too. Grief takes time.
Yes, he will find another job and this will work out. But that's not what he wants to hear right now. Let him feel what he's going to feel, say what he needs to say, and simply listen to him.
Thanks for the question.
I definitely agree with the Wise-One's advice (I call him that because he is not an ass!). Just be there for him and listen to him. My only other two cents would be to show him that you aren't going to walk away from him just because he doesn't have a job. Sometimes grief can make us feel as though we are about to lose everything in our life. And secondly, don't be afraid to ask, "Hey, what is it that I can do to help you right now?"
Thanks, kkb. You're so right about grief making you feel like everything you love is at risk. Good point.
I think that both Cary and kkb gave good advice but Id like to add something from personal experience:
One thing that I did that my man said really helped him was to make a point of assuring him how masculine he was. I asked him for help on lifting heavy things that I usually would have just handled alone, I praised him and marveled at his skill when he fixed the washing machine and the radiator in my car.
Losing a job can hurt a guys feeling of manliness. Fortunately, nothing can make a man feel more manly than his woman admiring said manliness. Just let him know that you still see him as a stud, still think he can fix anything (or solve anything, or lift anything, or whatever his strength is)
Let him know he's still your hero.
I can see how that could help, but if he catches on that you're doing that on purpose, it might feel patronizing. When I go through hard times, I just wanted to be treated the same way I always am, with the option of having a shoulder to cry on. Or cookie dough with a kung fu flick, one of the two. ;)
I just can't stand to get oodles of sympathy. It makes me feel too self-aware. And then sometimes it's like I'M the one having to reassure others that are feeling to bad for me, which only gets exponentially annoying.
I'd shoot for empathy, not sympathy.