Ladies, Being on top can be a very dynamic and empowering position. But, as evidenced here in your question, can also be a very intimidating and frightening location. The key is to get your... eagle on and avoid acting like a sitting duck.
Sure, its easy to be into it and go with the flow you an might be generating when he's in charge, but in order to really be a well rounded sex ninja, ladies - don't ignore thte top game.
I think in all of us is an innate knowledge of how to f*ck like a champ. The problem is inhibitions, judgment and fear get in the way. We crawl into our heads instead of letting our hips and crotch take the lead. In fact, as yu point out, now that you have deep feelings for a caring guy, you feel even more in your head.
So what to do: Well, its all about dancing like nobodies looking. The sexiest moves you can rock on top are essentially those that feel good to you. Whether that be slow and steady or pelvis popping up and down, if you are in the zone, guys will know it and appreciate it. And while your at it, show some eyes, don't hide behind that hair, lock pupils with your caring guys as if to say "Hey buddy, buckle up, I'm gonna take you for a ride"
It's the timidity that's kryptonite to sex. Own your sexiness and your desire to make both of you feel like Adam and Eve on spring break - and you'll be golden apple.
Funny Guy
one in the pink and one in the stink
She said guy not guys. Geez
The simple answer is this -
Do whatever feels good for you. Seriously, as a guy I respond more to my wife getting off and enjoying herself than I do to any move(s). And the thing is, when she's on top she always find a way to enjoy herself.
I have an ugly tummy (after a baby and bypass), so on top facing a guy in any sort of light is mortifying. May I suggest reverse cowgirl?
From my point of view, I don't think you can go wrong. Make sure you're in a position that keeps it comfortable for both of you [don't go bending him the wrong way] and do your thing. For guys in most cases all you need is wetness and some motion. A penis is easy to satisfy.
And just so you know, I have NEVER been put off by being asked what I'd like. I mean just come out and say it. "I don't have much experience here so can you just kinda guide me along?". Believe me, most guys will be more excited to find out you're new to it, and double excited to be asked to lead the show til you learn the ropes.