I would not date her because I'd know that developmentally I SHOULD be at a very different place than this chick and the fact that I'm not, and can see myself dating her is a problem. A problem that isn't hers, but mine. And so I would push myself to make the 36 year old decision even though my immediate impulse would be date this hot youngin'.
That said, your question is not about me, but some 30+ dude in your life. Having been 18 and now being 30+ I assure you the 30+ guy that wants to date you is bad news. Either he knows it or he does not. Irrelevant. Dating an 18 year-old is not like dating someone 25 or even, even 21. Being 18 is like being 17 with a birthday coming up. It's super young. I wish you'd have asked me, if I were YOU what would I do. That answer would be: Keep swimming. There are plenty of contemporary fish in your sea.
I second this advice. As someone who was at one point was 16 and dated someone who was 7 years older than her, Amit is 100 % right. My guess is maybe you connect with people older than yourself and are much more emotionally mature than your peers. However as someone who was the mature 16 year old that is now 26, all I can think is WTF was that guy thinking?
There is the whole other half of growing up which involves living and experiencing things which cannot be sped up. You just have to go out there and live it. And therefore you guys are in completely different places, and AS AN ADULT he should realize that. However if he's not a nice guy, he will date you because you're young and good looking and an ego boost. And you deserve someone who wants to be with you because you're fabulous...not because of what you can do for the other person.
Crush on him, maybe take some notes on some qualities that you like about him for future reference while wading in the dating pool. But stay away from dating him. You have a lot of living to do and adventures to find!
I dated a 34 year-old 'man' when I was 19... yeah, I was really cool. *eye roll* Thankfully, it lasted a grand total of 3-4 weeks.
Don't make the mistake of thinking that you maturity makes up for his lack of it. Because he IS immature, if he's trying to seriously date you. Let's be honest- if he weren't, he'd be dating someone his OWN age.
That said, if you just want some awesome sex, have at that!! Older guys are (from what I've seen) WAY less judgmental that younger ones... scars, stretch marks, "less-than-perfect" bodies. They are usually down, regardless!
so, what ARE you...30 or 36?
Totally agree. Been there, done that, bad news, leave ASAP. The age difference itself isn't the issue, the respective ages are.
I'm almost twenty three years old and my boyfriend is thirty five. We've been seeing each other for a little over a year. It is true, it's all about a person's maturity level. Don't get me wrong, it is very hard sometimes. Our mentalities on life right now are completely different. I am still a student in college finishing up my last semester, while he has worked at his job for about ten years while also having a four year old. It's all about give and take, and really understanding the issues the both of you will encounter during the journey of your relationship due to the age gap. In some ways I am extremely immature, but in other ways, so is he. I don't know if one day I'll look back on this relationship and laugh, or if it will eventually enter the next level.
Be prepared for people to talk. I hear it still after all the time that has passed, but it shows how much you care for someone by shutting out everyone else's opinions and following what you want.
Im dating a 35 year old guy, and i love him so much but he is insensible and one thing that wories me is that im 19 and im still a virgin and he's obssesed about sex an im timid to tell him that im still a virgin but for me its embarasing, but i love him and he's having a wife.Im cought in a situation that might be ravaged anytime.
I'm currently 19 years old, dating an amazing 36 year old. We've been together for well over a year now and I couldn't be happier. I have to admit at first I was very apprehensive (constructed societal ideals), what would my friends think, family etc.. Truth is I love him and so does everyone around me. Sure there are some people who think its too much of a gap but they can suck it. Are they happy? Maybe , maybe not. Truth is if you're happy then who cares what they think. I'm not saying go out and date a guy just because he's significantly older than you, but if the chance presents itself and he's a great guy go for it! I don't feel my age, neither does he. I'm into my third year of university, he has a solid job, and were planning to get married after I graduate. I'm not sure what posts are talking about " having to live while you're young" bull shit, I've already gone through my party stage ( it's lame). To put it into perspective I've been on a plan 3 times in the past year (of course paying my half, not a gold digger).
The ONLY downside I would say, we're many crazy exes. He's so handsome and caring they would not leave him alone for the longest time but we straightened that out pretty quickly.
Again, I think you should put happiness before what you think other people will or would not approve of
Plane 3 times *