I wish I could answer that. But if I could, I’d probably be lounging on a palm-lined beach on one of my private islands, counting my kabillions and not answering questions on Guyspeak. Nothing against Guyspeak–I love it here–but if I hit the lottery, you can all kiss my ass goodbye. I’ll send a postcard, though.
You are not alone, Lithuanian Girl. In fact, not only are you not alone, but I would say that 99% of women in the world have the same complaint as you. Men, too–from grades 5-8, my classmate Kelly Helmer had the hots for me. Her best friend Lynn would come to me at least once a fortnight to tell me that Kelly really wanted to “go” with me. (I never figured out that expression, at least as applied to kids under 16, who never “go” anywhere except back and forth to school). I wasn’t interested in Kelly, though; I liked Dana Purcell–who wouldn’t give me the time of day. C’est la vie.
Over the course of our dating lives, we will all meet more people who don’t interest us than people who do. It makes sense if you think about it: each of us has a checklist of traits we are looking for in a potential partner, our own specific recipe for the mate we want, but finding someone to fit even a majority of that list can be tough. We are all picky in our own way, as we should be.
A smart, funny, nice-looking girl like you casts a wide net of attraction, so you’re always going to pull in a hundred throwback fish for every lobster. Nothing against the fish, but it’s lobster you happen to be looking for. Unfortunately, you can’t get the one without pulling in the other. All you can do is keep sorting through your catch like the rest of us until you find the one you want to eat.
Wait–that came out wrong. But you get the idea.
Thanks for the question.