My guess is that men find you attractive and will continue to find you attractive just the way you are. You have a good appetite, you have a quick metabolism and I'm sure that your doctor gives you a clean bill of health at each check-up. So please use those facts to help fuel your self-esteem. Don't ever develop any kind of negative body image issues about it. You're healthy overall, and that's a good thing.
If you want to gain weight, gain weight. But do it for you and not for anyone else. If you want to stay the exact same weight, stay the exact same weight. Just focus now, and always, on your overall health. Exercise, eat healthy and diverse foods, get plenty of sleep and see your doctor regularly. Do those things right and you'll be just fine.
The men will be there, and they'll like you so long as you like yourself.
Ladies, any advice on being on the lean side of the spectrum?
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I'm not that thin personally, but having grown up with someone who definitely is I can relate. She probably eats more than me but she's the one people call anorexic. Added to that the whole backlash against skinny people in general because some clever people interpret 'curves are beautiful' as 'this means nothing else is' it can be pretty damaging to someone's self esteem.
But the thing is, not everyone is the same shape, and not everyone finds the same shape attractive, if we hold up one body shape as the template for what it means to be attractive we'll end up with a massive amount of sad unattractive-feeling people, which is just ridiculous.
Please don't feel you have to change to make yourself look good, if you're eating healthily, exercising well and have enough energy to do what most people your age are doing then it shouldn't matter what other people think about the way you look, it's not worth it if you're making yourself ill eating too much. Plus who knows? You may naturally gain weight later in life.
Oh and my sister definitely attracts more male attention than me. Maybe because she is so tall and thin but more likely because she's confident and out-going and dresses to flatter her figure.
Welcome to the club, sistah! Throughout my life I've had to struggle with people saying things like:
"you're so skinny, I don't like it", "you should gain some weight", "guys don't like skinny girls like you" "you won't get a boyfriend because you're too skinny." So I tried to gain weight unsuccessfully. My doctor asked me to stop trying to gain weight and he said I was very lucky I was skinny. He's right, you're a really lucky girl) so I decided to stop paying attention to whatever people had to say about me. It took me a while, but now I don't care if they find me attractive or not.
People will always have something to say regarding to your weight, height, body shape, personality etc. So let them talk all they want. The most importat thing is that YOU should feel attractive, be confident & love yourself.
I was super skinny when I was in high school and people would say all the time that I was anorexic, a beanpole, tell me to just gain weight, and just made fun of me mercilessly, etc. What I always hated was when girls that were overweight or obese would call me out on being too skinny yet god forbid if I ever pointed out how large they were. Such a dbl standard.
Yeah, that stinks, doesn't it. Plus, if one does gain weight, the people who were calling you skinny will be like: "oh no, you need to lose weight", "you should work out", "those clothes don't fit you", "guys don't like girls like you" bla la bla. It's a no-win situation. So screw them, haha.
:)
That sucks, but you still should call them out on it. I was very lanky as a kid and in high school, and what shut of bigger guys (most of them bigger because they were fat) was something like yeah, but at least I'm not a fattie. They grumbled but shut up just the same. I mean, it's not like you were going around and initiating the name calling on them, they were the ones starting it by being jealous.
I am always called skinny, it hurts just as much as someone being called fat, no one understands that
It bothers me so much, how people think they have the right to give their opinions about somebody's weight when nobody's really asking. Isn't it annoying when you run into someone and the first thing they say is: "you're so skinny, are you sick?" Or have you been gaining weight" Uh?
People are just rude, impolite and not nice.
i know, right? but if we were to say, "no i'm good, haven't put on an ounce. how about you? been putting a bit on?" then we are the bad guy, even though our question is just as rude as theirs.
Unsolicited "advice" is unwelcomed advice. I learned that years ago, much of the world hasn't.
As a guy, as long as there aren't bones protruding, then you're fine, hot actually. It's when a woman looks like she just survived a famine, that's when being too skinny is bad and that's what most (MOST, but not all) guys mean by not liking skinny girls. Indeed, I loathe the word skinny since it conjures up images of lanky men or famine victims. To describe thin women who are attractively thin, I prefer words like slim or my fave, slender. Slender, I visualize a thin woman but still just enough feminine curves on her so she doesn't look boyish.
But yes, there are a significant segment of men who are backlashing against slender women. This, I, personally, stems from most of these men not being attractive, and/or overweight, and realizing they'll never have slender women, so they resort to anger and hate against those women. And really, would you even want a man who's unattractive, let alone hateful?
Svelte is another good word, because of the implied elegance.
ooh that's a good one too!
I'm tall and skinny and eat like a pig, nothing happens. I have small boobs and a normal sized butt and lately I've felt self conscious because this "curvy women" thing seems to be popular among men. Even thought about taking that weigh protein stuff body builder take to build up muscle, I would just plan on taking it and doing nothing so it would turn into fat. I dont know if that is even how it works but in my imagination it could.. Then the world says super tiny Mila Kunis is "sexiest woman of the year", she has no curves, but then people still make fun of how fat Jessica Simpson is.. makes no sense..
It's hard being a woman and comparing your body to other women, it sucks. My bf looks a plump girl porn but its prolly just becasue guys look at the opposite of what they have, who knows, Ive hurt my brain and self image just thinking about it too much.. but I've gone out with guys who have pointed out they love my mall chest or long legs and thin waist. To each his own girl, don't worry about being chased by a chubby chaser, someone will find you and think you're just perfect!
And one more thing, if you chubby chicks keep using marilyn monroe pics on your fb, using her as an idol for " big girls" everywhere, well, its just really stupid IMO
Well referring to larger people as 'you chubby chicks' isn't going to help anything. You've experienced the negative effects of people lumping you into a group called 'too thin', you can't expect that to change if you yourself lump all larger females into this Monroe-idolising facebook bunch.
Everyone looses from this weird obsession our society has with a perfect body type, the girls who are naturally larger as well as the ones who are naturally skinny.
You are unhealthily skinny and need to get help.
I find it very funny that many of the commenters here who are talking about their experiences being thin and the negative comments they received throughout their life and the blows they took to their self-esteem are making negative comments about overweight girls. "At least chubby chasers don't like me," "fat girls made fun of me in high school", "fat girls idolize Marilyn Monroe, they're so stupid." It's hypocritcal - if it hurt you being called skinny then you should understand it's hurtful of you to do the same thing to another group.
I've been wondering that myself...when the hell did Marilyn Monroe be considered fat?!?!
Maybe it isn't right to point the blame at 'fat people.' But quite frankly, it is these people that make me feel like my thinness is something to be ashamed of. All my 'fluffy' friends love to point out how their boobs are huge and well....hard to have natural DD cups if you are at a healthy weight. I'm sure this sounds cynical, but let's look at some hard facts here: If you live in America, as a women, 2 out of 3 women are overweight, and 1 of those 3 is obese. So you have 3 women, one obese, one overweight, and one at a health weight. Therefore, as a thin American woman, you are automatically in the minority, and yes this creates a bit of animosity b/c we are shamed for something we should be proud of. All this 'curves are beautiful' and 'stop fat shaming' junk being thrown out there, well I'm just going to be frank, if you are fat b/c you have a food addiction then you should be ashamed of it like any other addiction. If you strive to be healthy, then you should be proud of your shape, regardless of size. I'm just saying, excuse the thin girls for being a little bitter at the 'fluffy club' b/c they are absolutely double our numbers and it gets damn tiring defending being thin all the time.
And larger girls probably find that the people giving them grief about it are the slim girls who don't understand how hard it is to loose weight once you've gained it. Personally I feel lucky I can eat like a pig and not have to then deal with constant hunger and hours at the gym to get myself down to a weight that's deemed acceptable. While I can gorge myself on cake I have a friend who won't even touch them because she knows the weight will just pile back on.
People shouldn't have to say the people with the opposite body shape to them are the root of all their problems to feel good about themselves, it just makes things worse. We should be able to support and encourage each other to become healthier, not knock each other down.
Also my boobs are pretty big and I'm definitely not obese so you're misinformed there.
I am misinformed that the majority of thin girls do not have naturally huge breasts? LOL Okay well you must know a bunch of very blessed thin girls with huge boobs; however, if you look at the general populace, huge breasts are usually matched with a huge body. I have gained weight before, and I have lost it as well, and I lead a healthy lifestyle to be a thin person. When 2/3 of the population is overweight, the pressure to be fat by far outweighs the pressure to be thin. I've been on both sides of the fence and seen both angles. I have great friends of all sizes, and I don't judge them & they don't judge me. My point is a food addiction is an addiction like no other, and society shouldn't be encouraged to accept it anymore than any other addiction that is slowly but surely killing you. It's not okay and people should respect themselves more.
Well.. yes actually, I might be just me being a large breasted thin girl attraction magnet but I know quite a few of them. We all get together and complain about how hard it is to find a big cup size and small band size. Not to mention I read somewhere a big department store in this country's best selling size was a 34DD.
Maybe people should respect other people too and not see them as lumps of meat who are too big or too small and feel entitled to call them hurtful names about it. Sure food addiction is a problem, so's cigarette smoking but I don't go out vilifying the smoking population at large. I'm pretty sure it's a personal struggle and the motivation to change comes from within themselves, not from people looking down on them for it.
It's not right to point blame at anyone, fat or skinny. If people would just concentrate on their own lives instead of casting judgement on someone else the world would be a better place - thin girls wouldn't be bitter that someone is calling them skinny and heavy girls wouldn't be bitter because someone is calling them fat - we're all in the same boat, body insecurity wise, and it's just silly we don't recognize it and instead knock each other down. And I believe this whole movement of "curves are beautiful" came about because so many young girls are becoming anorexic at like, 10 years old to keep up with the images they see in 17 Magazine and the like. I think it's a positive message for anyone at any age - if you're at a healthy weight for your body type, then love it whether you're a size 2 or a size 12 and who cares what the girl next to you looks like. If you're naturally thin as you say you are, it shouldn't offend you so much. If you take it to mean, well people can become obese and contract diabetes because that's beautiful, you're way off on understanding the message.
PS It is dumb for fat people to idolize Marilyn Monroe--she had a 22-23 inch waist. It makes no sense. She had a very hourglass shape as her hip to waist ratio was extreme-- 23 inch waist with 35 inch hips. Her body mass index was 22. A healthy BMI ranges from 18-24, so she was in fabulous shelf. She was 5'5 1/2. By comparison, my BMI is also 22, I am an inch & a half taller than Marilyn, have 36 inch hips and a 28 inch waist---no where near her tiny waist--so in my appraisal since I'm closer to being fat than she was, fat people should idolize me!! hahaha!! It would be equally stupid, it's like the Marlboro Man idolizing Jack Lalanne....do whaa?
i'm 5'11" and like many of the other commenters don't weigh much more than the OP, and i can and do eat whatever i want. i do have some health issues that have nothing to do with my weight, and my doctor considers me underweight obviously, but knows there's nothing that can be done about it. there IS a definite double standard on this issue. when someone is "jealous" about my weight or drops a comment, i always say something like, well, the grass is always greener, you don't have to visit a specialist 4 times a year like i do and i would gladly pack on 50 pounds to take that out of my life. but i have been called everything from a crack whore to an anorexic by those spiteful jealous mean girls, and yes, it IS usually girls heavier than i tossing the nasty comments around, i have never had anyone thinner than me criticize my weight. i always say right back to them, "my weight issues are mine, your weight issues are yours, unless you are prepared to put both of those things on the table for discussion, conversation is over." OP, you don't need to lose weight, gain weight, or "what", you just need to love yourself. and for the rest of 'em, let 'em eat cake. orr.....eat as much cake as you want and say thank you jesus every time you do. see here's the thing. most of the negative comments come from women, you rarely if ever hear it from men. and, unless that person is in my family, whenever someone (again, usually a woman) makes a weight comment, it's never out of concern for my well being. my perspective on women that criticize other women is that they are jealous. it is disempowering, and it is just plain wrong. women do not intentionally try to disempower and knock each other down unless they see something in that person they are jealous of. when you are confident and embrace yourself, life just plain rocks, no matter what size you are.
853972 270654Keep all the articles coming. I love reading through your things. Cheers. 263424