I can relate. My lady travels a lot too, and when she is home for any length of time I get a bit edgy about the disruption to my regular routine, even though I am happy she is home.
This always happens when a guy retires, though usually the complainer is the wife, not the daughter. She's got her routine, is used to making lunch for one and being able to do as she wishes during the day then, suddenly, BAM! A six foot, 200 lb impediment to her freedom is there every day, seemingly behind her every time she turns around.
Meanwhile, he has been looking forward to this for years. Able to finally spend a lot of time with his companion of many years and any children still at home. Time to have some fun, catch up on all the stuff he has missed. He finds himself lost and bored out of his skull within weeks. Nothing to do, and the lack of routine hurts badly.
Did you know that over 50% of retired men die (or divorce) within three years of retiring? Whether through sheer boredom or being poisoned by a frustrated spouse is hard to say, but it happens time after time.
Now, as for what to do:
Don't avoid the situation. You not going home after school is just prolonging the agony. You need to help him get into a routine and get used to him being in your routine.
Encourage him to take up a hobby - something he has always wanted to do but never had the time for. Gardening is a good one, so is writing.
Or do some volunteer work, that makes use of his experience and lets him get out of the house and feel useful.
Or redecorate the house while he is still physically active.
The sooner he settles into his own new routine, the sooner you can get back to yours.
Best answer from you yet MM!!
As for the asker, since you stated that youre 18, which means you should be adult enough to embrace changes. Besides, this is a wonderful change, your father ' back' in your life. You'll be surprised how many people wish that on a daily basis. Also, think in your old mans shoes; he can finally spend time with his daughter yet shes avoiding him for no good reason.
your dads not going to be around forever, youre not gonna be home forever either.treasure this time together while you can :)
Best answer from you yet MM!!
As for the asker, since you stated that youre 18, which means you should be adult enough to embrace changes. Besides, this is a wonderful change, your father ' back' in your life. You'll be surprised how many people wish that on a daily basis. Also, think in your old mans shoes; he can finally spend time with his daughter yet shes avoiding him for no good reason.
your dads not going to be around forever, youre not gonna be home forever either.treasure this time together while you can :)
Just noticed that my underlying assumption here is "working husband, stay at home wife." Sexist, probably, but I'll not apologize, as all the retired guys I know have exactly that background.
Well am i glad that this is common!! My BF, i love him, i really do - he travels alot and when he comes home - although i'm truly excited about it I get weirdly aggravated by everything he does. Takes days to get back into a routine: sleeping beside another person, cooking for two, taking the other person into consideration i.e not waking up too early/not using the hairdryer at certain hours - going from being totally independent to having to take another person into account.
I tend not to say anything - although I think my face says too much at times - it usually settles down once i get used to having him back and we get comfortable with sharing the space. I tend not to throw myself in there - rather - mark my own space and alone time and gradually ease back in to normality. Too much, too soon = CONFLICT.