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Wise-Ass

 
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I'm a 43 year old single mother of two. I've been dating this guy for 15 months and we have not gone out for dinner, movies, bowling, nothing except sex. Should I dump him or hold on?

Hold on? For what? Halley's Comet?

Call me crazy, but I think if Johnny Quickpants had any intention of taking you out on a bona fide date, he would've done it by now. It's only been, what, a year and change? Seems like at least once during that time he might've looked down while schtupping you and thought to himself, "Ya know, I really should buy her a burger some time."

It's not going to happen. You're a booty call for him, nothing more. Sorry to be blunt, but I gotta. You're his little secret. He's probably even married or at least has a girlfriend, which would explain not wanting to take you out in public.

If you're happy just porking this guy, knock yourself out. I would find out if he's married or otherwise entangled, though, because you don't want any part of that.

If you're looking for a relationship and someone who actually, like, cares about you and stuff, then dump his ass. As in, yesterday. God forbid your kids get attached to this asshat.

Move on. You can do better.

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11 Comments

prettylady

Wow, how did this lady even CONSIDER herself in a relationship if they've never been on a date???

user-pic

Rach -- You'd be amazed how quickly your idea of "normal relationship" can change when you're in a less-than-stellar situation and you are really hoping for the best.

prettylady

Oh I empathize cause I've been there too where I wanted badly for a guy to feel the way I felt about him. However, at 43, this lady should be capable of knowing that if a guy doesnt take you on dates or out in public and he only has sex with you... then he's using you for sex.
I hope that she stops spending time with him because clearly he's had all the time in the world to make feelings known if he had them for her. I hope she moves on and finds someone who will care about her and treat her right.

Mike

Heather speaks the truth. Some people want so hard to believe in a good thing that there's not much anyone can do to show them otherwise.

But Cary also spoke truth. This dude has what he wants - a place to stick his stick. I would expect anything he told you about himself is a lie and you should drop him like yesterdays garbage.

Daisy

Yes, definitely do NOT hold on. Let go, let go, let go. You deserve better treatment. You're worth it. Your kids deserve to see their mom with someone who cares about her instead of someone who uses her too.

user-pic

Hold on a minute kiddies... What's HER PAST look like? Did they meet in a SWING CLUB? There's more to it, if this guys still "hooking up" with her without making some kind of "exclusive commitment". Just saying...

Cary McNeal

I have no idea what you're "talking about."

Daisy

"Johnny Quickpants" *giggle*

babygirl west

is it mean to say "how the hell can you let yourself ask this question at your age??"
i'd get it if you were 18, but 43. let go of him and learn from your past relationships.

user-pic

Great job, Wise-Ass (sorry if that sounds sarcastic). I think your advice to her is upfront and very much needed.

Gordon

It depends on how you feel about him -- if you would like to keep the relationship going provided he treats you better, tell him it's gotta be that way or the highway -- and don't take no for an answer.

You must be good at sex or he wouldn't keep coming back, but let him know he won't get any more of that if he doesn't start showing you love outside the bedroom.

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