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How do I turn an ex that I'm over into a friend with benefits?

This is probably much easier than you think, assuming you two ended under amicable circumstances. If you two hate eachother, well, I'm guessing no amount of nudity is going to be worth having to spend time together.

Anyway, the best way to do this is to just ask, straight up. I'm assuming that you're a chick which is probably why you're asking instead of on the phone right now trying to convince your ex to just come over and hit you off one good time.

There's really no magic formula. Being as it is an ex, there's a comfort level and I'm sure you can call him up and talk to him about certain things you might be uncomfortable talking to others about. And this is definitely one of those things. I'm guessing he'll be more than okay with that as long as you all agree to not let it get funny (which it probably will - face it, movies get made about stuff like this for a reason).

So that's how you do it. Open up your mouth and ask if you can open up your mouth and hug.

Zing!

It was written.

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13 Comments

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I'm a chick too, but I don't believe that women can really have a no-strings attached fwb situation. It's just not in our nature. Feelings just get transferred. I've heard the best of them argue that it *can* be done, but I disagree. I say, leave him as an ex and be done with it. It's not worth the feelings that will eventually resurface. Especially if the s*x is good.

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I'm having a friends with benefits situation with my ex :) I think the reason why its successful is because I don't feel emotionally attached to him. But, I'm human and I need sex. Theres nothing hard about it, just start hanging out again. If you have sexual chemistry it will sort of happen on its own. The only snag is if hes dating someone new...then of course this could be harder to do.

I'm tired of this whole, "But women have emotions" blah blah blah ... Hell, part of the fun of being single is being able to have hot hate sex with whomever. Don't fall into that over played "emotions" crap.. You need some affection, ain't nothing wrong with getting it from someone who you have a platonic friendship with :)

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You have to honest with yourself, are you really Over him ? Also, as long as you are engaged with him, you may not be opening yourself up to men and potential partners. don't sell yourself short, you can find a partner that loves you and respects you and also satisfies you in bed !

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I also want to add, that yes we all need sex- but I've found the best sex I've had is when I have an emotional connection with my partner. Otherwise, I'd just have "safe sex" with myself :)

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And I bet your still single.... BTW you can have effective safe sex with a partner. Commitment does not equal happiness in most cases.

brncrml1985

How do u submit a question I went to ask a question but there is no where to submit it?? Thanks Im new to the site

brncrml1985

How do u submit a question I went to ask a question but there is no where to submit it?? Thanks Im new to the site

brncrml1985

How do u submit a question I went to ask a question but there is no where to submit it?? Thanks Im new to the site

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BFF, I was afraid the answer was going to be to just grow a pair and do it. My main concern is trying not to come off as if I want us to get back together romantically.

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What a lovely day for a 1051797! SCK was here

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What a lovely day for a 2366968! SCK was here

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I have to say that for the last couple of hours i have been hooked by the amazing posts on this website. Keep up the wonderful work.

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Friends with benefits can work,I'm doing it now with my ex. I'm not the 'girlfriend' type I have no emotion towards him just chemistry. Its entirely about the sex

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