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I am in the same industry as my ex and I hate him. He burned me really badly, cheated and lied, so I want nothing to do with him. I don't even want to be cordial. How can I get around him when we have to see each other at these stupid company events without being a total bitch in front of my superiors?

First question: do you have to attend these events? Seeing this guy all the time just fans the flames of anger. It would be nice if you could go six months without seeing his ugly stupid cheating face.

If you must be at the same functions, the first thing to do is just avoid the guy, obviously. I don't know how big these things are, but it shouldn't be too hard to stay across the room from the guy for a couple of hours. Otherwise, I would just completely ignore the guy if I were you. Pretend he's not there.

I can't imagine that your bosses will find that bitchy, especially if they know your history with him. It's not like you're going to cuss the guy out in front of everyone, or jam a toothpick in his eye and eat it like an olive, then drink champagne from his socket. As long as you aren't making a scene, it's really none of their beeswax.

I will spare you the lecture about how hating someone that much does more harm to you than it will ever do to him. It might be a fresh breakup and you're allowed to be angry for a while. Just be careful not to let it linger, because it will eat you up and keep you from moving on.

I guess I didn't spare you the lecture after all, but at least it was brief.

Thanks for the question.

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