"If you think you can "take" the other person, keep it up." ~ Made me laugh out loud..very funny!

While getting beat down for hooking up with another lady's man is funny, the struggle one can have with their own inner demons is long lasting and pretty torturous. You may feel guilt free now, but that will not last forever. Why not have a "casual" relationship with someone who is not attached? It's a lot less stressful and you might not get your ass kicked, might.

I feel sorry for you. Your lack of empathy is sickening. Guess you have yet to be cheated on in your lifetime but karma's a bitch.

haha don't be so mad his answer was funny. and its true why should the girl feel bad shes not the one who is supposed to be faithful its the guys fault (even though she could stop it...) well anyways it made me laugh

DEAR GOD WHY.

I am so tired of you, Mystery Man.

Mystery Man, why haven't you been kicked off guyspeak?

ASKER: STOP BEING A TRAMP. It's people like you who truly deserve to be called a slut. Karma is going to kick your ass so hard, you just wait.

uhhh what is the problem?? why are his answers bad?? bc he doesnt write a 5 paragraph essay explaining to you ladies EXACTLY what you want to hear? I literally do not get it... it is guy speak...answers from a guys point of view...and when you send in a question you can choose which one of the guys you want to answer and guess what these ladies picked mystery man! ... what do you want him to sit and say? ohh no you should stop hooking up with taken guys thats very bad and karma will get back to get you blah blah blah..... jeeeeeez haha

There's plenty of reasons TO stop: callously hurting somebody else (when she finds out, and she will), plenty of other guys to f*ck around with, fear of getting curbstomped, judgement of people around you, suddenly realising you can be a better human being than that...
But hey, if neither shame or consequences bother you, go right ahead. Just don't say nobody warned you.

Oh, clutch your pearls a little harder, ladies. I heard someone say once, "You should care about her as much as he cares about her", and I agree. If the dude is cheating on his girl, he obviously is a shitty boyfriend, doesn't care about his girlfriend, so why should the other woman? That is all on him. It would be shitty to rub it in her face, but if it wasn't her, it would some other girl. The other woman isn't FORCING him to cheat, he is choosing to. She isn't cheating on anyone. Wah wah she's 'HELPING HIM!!'. She isn't doing anything other than sleeping with a guy - HE. IS. THE. ONE. CHEATING.

I'm consistently surprised at how shitty women can be to other women. 'Tramp' and 'slut', seriously? Someone not subscribing to YOUR morals does not make you morally superior.

Meh. I liked Mystery Man's answer. Sure it may get many a woman's panties in a bunch -- but I feel that it was sincere and full of a good ol' dose of reality. I am not subscribing to side with the poster of this question but at the same time throwing the proverbial morality holy book and telling her she is a horrible person and calling her names like 'slut' will not help her. Or...you know, want to listen to advice that is judgmental and condemning.

Dear Poster: you are better than this guy -- this douchelord who obviously does not respect you or his significant other. You are beautiful and sexy and certainly can find a FWB who will respect you. This guy is using you (and you may think you are using him back -- but it is not true, which is why you are even asking this question) at the cost of your self respect. You are worthy of more. Cut ties with this guy and find someone who you can go out in the daytime to get ice cream (without hiding); have sex anywhere you please (without lying about it); tell your friends stories about (without being ashamed of it). You aren't a slut or a whore or a horrible person. You just deserve better.

His fidelity is not her responsibility.

lol ok been in this situation, but I was the woman who got cheated on and .... well I didn't place blame on the other woman at first... I confronted told her hey ya know I know and she blew me off and basically put me at blame for it happening.... The truth is girls are all backstabbing bitches at one point. Karma is a bitch........ and it will come back to haunt you when you lease expect it. My husband and I had a family together and now its all been torn apart because some girl couldn't get the hint and he couldn't keep his thing in his pants.

The boyfriend is the one cheating. The asker is the one helping. They both should stop. Right now. Why have friends with benefits anyway? Does sex really mean that little to people now? All that aside, you should have more respect for yourself. If you want to be a walking, talking blow-up doll that's your choice, but your choices effect everyone involved. Your boy-toy/walking dildo has no respect for his girlfriend. And no matter how you look at this, you are his friend that is a girl that he is sleeping with (often called a girlfriend).
I'm not going to throw the moral compass at your forehead, but it would be wise to think about how you would feel in his girlfriend's situation. Probably not so great.
I advise you to go to a sex toy party and buy a few things for yourself. A big dildo (they even have sparkley ones now!) or possibly a nice vibrator. They'll probably be less trouble than a cheating boyfriend anyway. They don't have sexual needs. Or brains. That way, you can continue to live in your "all about me" world.

Lavender & Mystery Man--thank you for being realistic. I also am the "other woman", FWB with an ex-boyfriend who moved out of town, he started seeing someone else, and then I moved to the same town a few months later. We resumed hanging out, he resisted being intimate, but then eventually we became FWB. He's hot, he's sweet as can be when we're together, we have coffee, lunch, dinner, together sometimes, it's not just sex. We're friends and enjoy each other's company.

It's not so easy to find someone else who's not attached and that I find attractive and compatible. This works for me until I find some one more available and equally desirable. My FWB would be perfect if only he were faithful (either to me or to his GF, he has many wonderful qualities). The FWB guy is just as selfish and in an "all about me world" as the woman may be, if she even is.

I'd like a healthier relationship but haven't met anyone I'm interested in. People tell me I'm kind, intelligent, and beautiful, so why can't I find someone I'm attracted to who also likes me (and is single, emotionally mature, etc.)? It's discouraging that the men who approach me often are significantly older, unattractive, and/or really out of shape (OK, not necessarily the shape, but lack of caring for one's health that turns me off). I'm not shallow; I've tried to give guys a chance that I typically would write off because I don't find them attractive, and guess what? I go out on a date or two with them and I don't find them attractive!

Pretty means nothing, somethings in life might be easier for attractive people, but surprisingly, dating is not.

I am the other woman and I feel no guilt doing what I am doing. This does not make me heartless, uncaring, bitchy or hateful. Nor does it make me slutty or trampy. I have a couple hours a week with this man, usually at his place of business after hours and some times it ends up that we have sex. Other times we talk and kiss and laugh and enjoy some intimacy other than the physical kind.

I don't ask for anything more, and whether I will see this "thing" progress to a different level remains to be seen. What I do know is this- he is outrageously funny, smart, handsome, and works his butt off 6 days a week. Where is this woman that should be supporting him while he takes care of two businesses? She goes on vacations without him, while he manages the house, and two businesses. I'm sorry but she is no better a person if she does not support the union that she entered into with this man. In MHO, I feel that she is selfish, uncaring and bitchy.

Not really sure the point I am trying to make except that the other woman is not necessarily a bad person- and neither is the man she is with. He is looking for something that he SHOULD be getting at home and I am enjoying time spent with a man who I feel is actually worth spending time with.
BTW- I have been cheated on and never blamed the other woman. Yes, it hurt,yes I felt betrayed and it was painful to find out- but I recognized that the relationship had issues and in the end- my ex of 14 years was seeking what he wasn't getting with me. He found that with another woman and he is still with her 8 years later. I don't hate him for this and in fact, his actions have made me see relationships in a different light. I now realize that when people stray, it isn't always because someone is a cheating, lying, horrible person but maybe looking for the affection and caring they thought they were getting when they married their partner- and in fact, if you have a spouse who is non supportive when they vowed to love you through thick and thin, are they not betraying the relationship as well???

If anything, his actions made me realize that when I am ready to marry again-I will make certain that my partner is someone that I am willing to love unconditionally...and give him everything he needs and desires, so he does not need to seek it from someone else.