Wait, let me consult my magical device which tells me if guys are lying...Yes, he's lying. Or maybe he's not, and you're the only woman who crosses his mind during sex. Either way, why are you asking him this? Of course he's going to say, "I only think about you, sweetie." Men are programmed to say that. It's in the handbook we all use, right next to "Yep, crazy Tami in your office sure is crazy."
Look, we can't control where our thoughts go in the moment. We might suddenly think about the cute clerk we saw at Barnes and Nobles the other day, or the tasty sammich we had for lunch. We try to focus on you, but sometimes random stuff just pops in there.
And, sorry, occasionally he's going to think about other women, even if only for a second. But he's with you. Are there other concerns with your relationship? Do you not trust him? Has he ever strayed? Do you think there's the chance of him cheating? Or do you lack confidence in the relationship? Address those questions before you worry about whether he's occasionally thinking about, say, Jennifer Connelly or Kate from Lost.
Perhaps you should take some time for yourself to make yourself feel more confident. Get a new haircut, sign up for that painting class you always wanted to take, buy a new outfit. Feel confident that your husband is still attracted to you and you have an active sex life. And try not to be the "thought police" all the time. Chances are he's thinking about you. (75% of the time anyway.)
Look, we can't control where our thoughts go in the moment. We might suddenly think about the cute clerk we saw at Barnes and Nobles the other day, or the tasty sammich we had for lunch. We try to focus on you, but sometimes random stuff just pops in there.
And, sorry, occasionally he's going to think about other women, even if only for a second. But he's with you. Are there other concerns with your relationship? Do you not trust him? Has he ever strayed? Do you think there's the chance of him cheating? Or do you lack confidence in the relationship? Address those questions before you worry about whether he's occasionally thinking about, say, Jennifer Connelly or Kate from Lost.
Perhaps you should take some time for yourself to make yourself feel more confident. Get a new haircut, sign up for that painting class you always wanted to take, buy a new outfit. Feel confident that your husband is still attracted to you and you have an active sex life. And try not to be the "thought police" all the time. Chances are he's thinking about you. (75% of the time anyway.)
does he really love me like he said he does?
See Cary's (The Wise-Ass) answer regarding the same subject. They are words to live by!
There's an easy way to tell. If he's really into it, he's thinking about you. If he's just going through the motions, he's probably got someone/something else on his mind.
I find thinking about other people (though usually including my partner) gets me to O. That's cause my biggest fantasy is a bunch of guys, and it's just weird if I imagine them to all be my boyfriend :D
It doesn't mean I don't love him to bits, and enjoy sex a lot with him, it's just how that works for me. Everyone's different. I'd be a lot more worried if you found someone else's knickers or he smelled of another perfume or something.
I think everyone, male or female, will occasionally think of someone else while having sex. We're human. On the flip side, well-timed thoughts of Bea Arthur or Tyne Daly can help a guy keep things going a few extra minutes, if you know what I mean.
Thanks for the shout-out, Leslie.
I had sex tonight and thought of a whole group of different people. It really really helps to hit the big O. I say leave him alone and address your own internal insecurity.
Can I get a resounding I LOVE MYSELF until you believe it? Cause when you do, you won't be asking those kinds of questions.
Personally, I think of shopping lists and what my plans are for the next day, or what kind of cookies I'm going to bake next. Perhaps that is why I never O? Hmm... you gals have got me thinking! ;-)
Only worry about this "scenario" if ALL he thinks about is other women during sex. Because, if that's the case, I'm pretty sure you'll be able to differentiate. Just as above woman said, you think of all kinds of things during it do you not?
Chances are, he thinks of other woman(and doing said activity with her) much more often randomly throughout the day, much more often than when you two are gettin busy.
I wouldn't have any idea if my husband thinks about hotter women. We hadn't had any intimacy, sex, togetherness, love or communication in almost 45 years. After the I DO's were over we had sex and that only lasted about 10 minutes . From that time till now my husband has wanted nothing from me. He started working midnights and moved to the basement, that way he could live in the same house but away from me and the world. He has no friends, Tv,computer or phone and hates to read. So he stays cooped up downstairs I guess staring at the four walls around him. I on the other hand try to not bother him, I work part time and have my own friends. I don't have any male friends because I no longer trust any male.