You will never know how pleased and happy I am!
Still, a promise is a promise. Said I would answer your question, so I shall. Not, now, for you (thankfully!), but for others who may be in the same boat.
You see why suicide is considered a sin and a waste? One short month later and already things are looking up for you. Not great yet, but getting there.
Yet to answer your actual question - no, you were not a bad person to feel some peace for taking control. You were simply being human.
Despair is so [CENSORED] easy. We have all done that. Things pile on to you and keep piling on and giving up starts looking like a sensible option. A way of getting a little bit of peace. Eventually it looks like the only option. Yet it is a false peace. Simply wrong.
Like it or not, you are a member of the nastiest, most aggressive species that ever clawed its way to the top of the food chain. Without the benefit of claws, sharp teeth or speed either. We got there simply on guts and the core idea of looking out for each other.
You got guts. More than you realize.
Welcome back.
Odd thing. Had a lot of Thank You posts these last three days. Going to run them as a few bonus answers if they are appropriate. Some are, some are not.
Holy crap, I squeaked when I saw the sig on this question! Kudos to you, Nano! All my love and deep deep relief for you :D
I like it when you post thankyous MM! They're very hope-giving.
I hope things continue to get better for you Nano, I'm glad you've started to make your way out of such a dark patch, I know it takes some willpower.
i have the biggest smile on my face right now, it's sooooo good to hear from you. i'm not going to lie i was worried there for a minute. MM is right, you have way more guts than you think. the silver lining that encompasses a tunnel of darkness is the lesson that no matter what happens, you know you have the skills and tenacity to come out the other side, no matter what. you've made my day and it hasn't even really started yet. you should be very proud of yourself for the hope and inspiration that you are giving to others, because you ARE. i will continue to uplift you in my thoughts and prayers as you keep on keeping on with this thing called life. best of luck with the new guy, or with the next one if he turns out to not be your bag of tea : ) "Nolite to bastardes carborundorum." don't let the bastards get you down.
Hey guys. Figured I'd drop in and say a few more thanks, because it wasn't just MM, but the community at large that saved my butt. Thank you all, sincerely. I'm moving towards better things now, and making changes that need to be made. Some of them are tough changes to make, but they are ones that I will step up to make. And thanks to the outpouring of support when I was in an ugly time in my life, I have the strength to face those tough choices and decisions head on!
Much love and thanks to everyone who's been there to help and hear me out, and if anyone sees this and needs the same help, ask, because it's so worth the pride-swallowing it takes.
~Nano!
I went through some sh*t myself over the past 3 months... Illness and almost losing the new job I have because of it and dealing with some badmouths/backbiters in the office (who almost got me fired).
I go back every now and then rereading what I wrote in response to the question you submitted, NanoGirl. I suppose that was my way of saying I've gone through sh*ttier before, so I can pull myself on this one.
Today (after a month long illness that now has me battling with some form of mild asthma), I did 2 meditations and have done 2 things I was so afraid to do during my very recent battle with (mild) depression. I seem to have forgotten the power of that little tweak we usually need to change the course of our own detrimental and paralyzing thoughts.
This site has been more helpful than I imagined it would be since I joined. The comments have both been uplifting, amusing and yes, sometimes disbelieving. But if anything, the GuySpeak pips have really pulled a lot of us out of our sob stories.
I don't know how else to express my gratitude, except really by saying THANK YOU GUYSPEAK PEOPLE!
I hope everyone here would get to read your story, MM's response, the readers' comments and learn from them. There's always hope. Always.
Nano, whoever you are, I missed your original Q to MM but I have tears of happiness in my eyes for you ( ok, I know I don't know you or anything) . But, you know what? You don't have to know somebody , you just have to speak up , say you care, let them know they aren't alone and maybe you might just end up helping someone. Praise God for you, Nano. You are a beautiful and significant human being, and the world is better with you in it.