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I did something bad in the past and looked at bf's computer. Found creepy porn with drawn anime children and real women dressed as kids. He said he would stop but he hasn't. I can't take it anymore. I want to break up but we live together. Only my name is on lease but I don't want him to be homeless. What do I do?

First off, you're not going to be homeless if you break up with your boyfriend. There are options to get out of every lease, no matter where you live. Look up the tenants rights in your state to confirm what I'm telling you. And even if you can't or don't want to get out of your lease, Craigslist exists for the sake of finding roommates after break ups.

Now that that's been said, let's talk about the issue that makes you want to break up with your boyfriend - pornography. There's nothing necessarily wrong or weird with looking at pornography, so long as it's legal pornography. But if what he's looking at is making you uncomfortable or changes the way you think about him, then there is something wrong. Said another way, don't break up with him because he looks at odd pornography. Break up with him because of how his odd pornography impacts you. I know that seems like a matter of semantics, but it's a point I want to make.

Be very clear with your boyfriend about why you're breaking up with him - he lied to you, and he's looking at things that are troubling to you. Those two things combined are an entirely rational reason to break up. That's what you should tell him.

Then go get a roommate.

Related Links:

He Looks At Porn When I'm In The Room

He's Going To A Porn Convention

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3 Comments

avinity

I think she meant she doesn't want HIM to be homeless. But the point is the same - he has lots of options, I'm sure. Friends he could stay with until he finds a place? Family? There are plenty of apartment complexes that will take you on short notice.

The semantics are important, though. He lied to you and continues to do something you've stated you're uncomfortable with.

Good luck sweetpea.

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She should still loom up tenant laws, even someone not on the lease usually has certain rights, whether that's thirty days or two weeks or whatever. That time is there specifically so the person has the time to find someplace else, and not be homeless. So it may be awkward, but she should give him the time, within legal reason, he needs to find a new place.

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Personally I would be cautious of a guy like this. Can you imagine if they ever had a child together. Is that something you would want to worry about. That would be another reason to break up IMO.

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