I feel like men are scared of me. Not to brag, but I'm extremely intelligent, I have a wonderful job, and I'm a pretty girl. What do I need to do to boost their confidence when asking me out? Should I tone myself down? I feel like they are scared I'll turn them down because I have a history of over-analyzing.
Mystery Man answered this question on
January 12, 2012 6:00 AM
Why wait for them? Ain't no law against you asking them out. Not exactly lady like, but acceptable now-a-days.
Still if you want to tone it down and learn how to flirt, give this blog post a try.
And NEVER over-analyze. For most guys that is like sandblasting a soup cracker. We are simple souls.
NEVER tone yourself down. unless you are walking around telling people you are 'all that', then don't tone yourself down. i'm not real big on asking guys out either, but that's more nerves than norms for me. he's right, get your flirt on. what we forget sometimes is that men in fact are not of a different species. they are as human as the rest of us, and have all of the same nerves that we do. if a man thinks you are interested, he might just ask you out. but if he thinks for a millisecond that you are going to turn him down, he won't even bother. so again, get the flirt on.
Are they really the ones who is scared or is SHE? You know those over-analyzing thoughts usually points to one's own self-image and doubts.
"Ahh, yes, that guy was moving to fast so I'll cross him out (Or was he? Or maybe I gave my number to him a tad bit too early?). And that guy had a dot of cream on his chin while we were having desert. Gawd, wasn't he even aware? (Maybe I should have done what I saw in that romcom where this girl wiped the guy's cheek with her finger... Hmmm...). This other guy didn't call me after three days. I know I shouldn't wait. Cross out? But he was cute. Uhmm... (Or maybe I should have picked up the phone and dialed myself? But I don't want to be the one chasing after men! So distasteful!) Sigh. We had a very nice conversation though. Crossed out."
What's with all these wonderful women saying men are going to be afraid of them? B*LLSH*T to that! The only person who's really afraid is the one who fears letting the thought "I'm going to intimidate and scare him" go.
It's effing 2012. Take a stab at it, woman! ;)
But you IS bragging. WOMAN, if you is high maintenance, you need someone who is low maintenance.
DONT find someone like you, find your complement.
Based off of how you described yourself in this question. Yes, you need to tone it down. You're too full of yourself.
And this is what is wrong with society: a woman who makes the statements "I am pretty" "I am very smart" and "I have a wonderful job" is told she is "too full of herself." maybe the simple fact is that she owns a mirror, likes her reflection and her job, and is undeniably smart. Also, you're an ass.
Lady, I know what you mean and you don't need to tone it down. Your pickings will be slimmer, but that will make them better in the long run as they'll fit for you.
I ended up marrying the first man I'd ever met who wasn't afraid of me. It's worth the wait.
I SO agree with this. She doesn't come across as full of herself or conceited, she just knows what she has. What's wrong with that?