Well, I wouldn't say you're being a jerk, per se, but you're definitely not being very patient. You love this guy but you can't wait out his post-surgery adjustment period? Seems like you're not willing to put the work into this relationship. The more he exercises and takes care of himself, the faster that excess skin you're so horrified by will disappear. He could probably really use your support right now. I would imagine gastric bypass surgery, and the physical change his body is currently undergoing, is not easy on your guy. Maybe his body won't be your perfect ideal right away (or ever), but I would hope you love him for more than his looks. Otherwise, why are you with him? Is this the guy you want to get old with? Cause I got news for you-- skin gets really excess-y and hang-y when you get older. If you can't handle the occasional love handle, you may want to cut out right now.
Presumably, you started dating him before the surgery, yes? Even though you have this "I usually date skinny guys" rule, you broke it for this guy. Love won out over arbitrary preferences. But now you're getting cold feet. Fine, you're finding him less attractive. But if you really love him, you'd be willing to look past his so-called flaws while he gets in shape. "Remnants of love handles" doesn't sound all that bad. Either way, it sounds like he's on the way to becoming the type of guy you usually date. It would be a shame if this relationship ended because you couldn't get over your own body issues.
Presumably, you started dating him before the surgery, yes? Even though you have this "I usually date skinny guys" rule, you broke it for this guy. Love won out over arbitrary preferences. But now you're getting cold feet. Fine, you're finding him less attractive. But if you really love him, you'd be willing to look past his so-called flaws while he gets in shape. "Remnants of love handles" doesn't sound all that bad. Either way, it sounds like he's on the way to becoming the type of guy you usually date. It would be a shame if this relationship ended because you couldn't get over your own body issues.
Well said, Nick.
Love can last forever, looks not so much. I know that it must be freaking you out right now, but if you do really love him, you'll overlook the current change in his body.
To be fair, the extra skins that usually results after tremendous weight loss is nothing like the excess hangy skin that naturally occurs with age.
It is significantly different in that it drapes and has a larger presence. On the abdomen it is much like an apron. It is an entity all on its own. The folds under the skin collects moisture, etc. and require special care.
Not that I have any ideas for her but the person asking this question has valid concerns. I would bet there are message boards and support groups that have some threads discussing this very concern.
PLEASE break up with him so he can find true love…., sheez.