Being exclusive should not feel like a trap, it should feel like a treat - a good opportunity. Your question sounds more like, can I still technically f*ck around on this person?
Maybe I'm exaggerating your lack of interest in exclusivity, and maybe it's a fair question, but it sounds like your partner may want more than you at this time. Maybe clarifying the nature of your relationship will make things easier for both of you: Letting you play the field and letting your squeeze in on the deal.
Do you really want a situation where your partner's crying in your car and your only response is "I'm legally in the clear here, sweetie"?
Funny Guy
Very well said FG
I'm witnessing the results of a couple who both did just that at one point or another in the early stages of their relationship. They are madly in love now and totally committed, yet still each feels some guilt and a small bit of mistrust in the other given the loopholes they each took advantage of. Both regret their behavior and wish they were more honorable.
Aww, but they seemed to have gotten past that. They really should let it go so they can fully enjoy each other now.
i agree, very well said. first sentence pretty much knocks it out of the park. i think an entire season of Friends, maybe two even, was built around the "we were on a break" tragedy lol
Yes, Chrissie. Exactly.
I just lived the "We were on a break" scenario, after 6 months, except my Ross was the one to want a break, and slept with a girl from a bar, not the copy store.
I went "no contact" for weeks which drove him crazy, and he professed his undying love for me only to get back together and him wanting a break again 6 weeks later. We're broken up now. For good.
The off and on thing erodes trust.
My lesson? LIke AW says...a treat. Exclusivity should be a natural progression in a relationship, not forced or expected or "tolerated".
I don't know, I saw this as the poster having just met someone, starting to see them but not having gotten to the "we're actually a couple" stage, and wondering if it was ok to still see other people (i.e. go for coffee) until they (the poster and their love interest) have decided that they are actually an item.
To me, in that scenario, it would be fine to see others if you're not sure yet that you've actually made it to the bf/gf stage.
Mind you, if it's an actual couple who is on a break or something, then no, I would definitely say "break off the relationship first before seeing others".
I would say feel free to date who you want until you agree to date exclusively. I mean,why shut down potentials just because you THINK this one might want you? I have gone out with this one guy once, and we text everyday but nothing else has been arranged yet. Do I say no to the other boy I like just because this guy might potentially go for me? Of course not!
I met a man on a dating site and we immediately became sex partners. I am not promiscuous..... however I have needs. I am exclusively sleeping with him. We agreed that he and I would date other people. I am fully aware that he is most likely is sleeping with other women/woman. If he were to ask me to be an in an exclusive relationship..... I am not sure that I could say yes. We are both online dating, thus we are dating different. In other words he is my one and only lover and I am free to date other men.
I met a man from a dating site and we immediately became sex partners. I am not a promiscuous woman, however I do have needs. I informed him that I would sleep exclusively with him. We agreed that we would continue to date other people. I am sure he is sleeping with another woman/woman. I accept this situation as I want to date and have fun at this point in my life. After all the purpose of subscribing to a dating site is to date different people. If he were to ask me to be in an exclusive dating relationship, I do not think that I could say yes. Two weeks ago I went away for the weekend with a male friend. When I returned from the trip, my lover wanted to know if I went with the girls or a male friend. I stammered and could not give an honest answer. Since then, he does not text me on a daily basis and no sex. I have been sexually exclusive and honest with him. He made it clear to me that he wanted to date other women. He and I agreed to this arrangement....... yet I am left in the cold. There is nothing to discuss with him.... just move on.