Why did it kill your confidence? You said yourself he was kind of douchey, so why blame yourself for not hitting it off with this guy?
You can bring your A-game every time, but that doesn't mean you'll make a love connection with every Tom, Dick and Harry you date. It's called chemistry. When it's not there, it's no one's fault; it's just not there. There's no reason to feel like you screwed up.
This won't be the last time you don't click with someone, so nip this "it was my fault" business before it turns into a habit. Every bad date teaches us something, so chalk it up to experience and move on.
Thanks for the question.
Thank you Cary.., I tell this to my friends all the time.
Oh sweetheart, welcome to the wonderful world of dating... : ) The guy who sends you the wittiest most articulate e-mails is different than the guy on the phone, and even more different than the guy you actually meet. So, chalk it up to a "bad date story," find something to giggle about and keep going! I once met a guy online who claimed to be "a professional, classy, stylish surgical resident of average height seeking a long term relationship." The guy who showed up to meet me was 5'1," and wore birkenstocks and a dirty t-shirt on a first date (to an NYC lounge). He was also a total pot head and asked me to go back to his place for some adult fun. EEK!
Just know it happens to the best of us.....and press on! : )