The problem with moral clarity is not so much arrogance, but the judgemental attitude it fosters in you. Since there is no such thing as a black and white moral problem (if it is black and white it ain't exactly a problem), you are gonna come down always on the side of your own prejudices and pet peeves, instead of examining all the factors closely.
Oh, arrogance is definitely there too - you are setting up everyone around you to fail?
Pull the other leg, it's got bells on.
Your opinion is really not that important to them. If someone "fails" in your eyes but not in their own, which opinion is more important? Clue - not yours.
As for drawing the line:
No one is right all the time (except for me, obviously). Two things to bear in mind would be "Judge not, lest you be judged" and "When in doubt, engage brain, not mouth."
It makes life more peaceful and keeping friends easier.
Say yes, when you should say yes. Say no, when you should say no. When in doubt, don't.
My favorite T shirt says "The answer is No. What was your question?"
"When in doubt, engage brain, not mouth."
Great quote!
"Everyone around you is failing'' ...
you should stop giving them marks- yet, I would like to add to have a bottom line- below which is UNACCEPTABLE- judgmental or not- there you can put abusive people or criminals etc. (just some examples)
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keep your morals- let others keep theirs
I heard on the radio once: "Atrocities are only committed through moral certainty." The people slaughtering entire villages during the crusades thought what they were doing was the right thing to do. Settlers in North America didn't think they were committing cultural genocide on the Natives, they actually thought they were helping them and educating them and giving them a better life.
I think what's important to take from this quote is to always STOP and THINK before you do something purely out of morality. Is it ACTUALLY the right thing to do? Don't just blindly follow your morals. Have them, keep them, but constantly reexamine them so the morals themselves don't end up hurting anyone.
I'm Jellybean, the one who asked the question. Thanks for answering MM and to everyone else for their comments.
This question was prompted by a friend of mine who is usually honest and kind, but since she started dating this guy, she has been constantly breaking plans or even leaving halfway through if the guy comes calling. He treats her like dirt and I have been the friend by her side that helps her through it. But I lost my temper the other day when she ditched me again. I pointed it out to her and she is upset with herself because she didn't realize she was doing that, but part of me is wondering if I'm being too hard on her? She has apologized. I guess I just needed guidance on how upset I should be. Like I said, she is usually a good person, but this has been going on for about a year now. Thoughts?
A dumb friend is still a friend. It's not malicious right? Just wilful blindness.
Ignore it.
Thanks MM.