OK, why are you on eggshells here?
There are many reasons for an honorable discharge - the main ones being he has done his time successfully or, despite being an exemplary soldier, he is no longer physically or psychologically capable of performing to standard, or cutbacks leading to him being surplus to requirements. There is a full list of the Army Guide for Administrative Separations here if you want to download it and can handle legalese, but those are the three biggies.
First and last cases - no problem at all. The guy did his job incredibly well (getting an honorable is pretty hard) and either finished the contract or got laid off through no fault of his own. No worries there.
The middle one can be problematic, if you let it. I am assuming there is no overt physical disabilty that would lead to an early discharge, otherwise you'd have mentioned it or simply not be worried about it, but some illnesses don't show, like malaria, or a bout of pneumonia that could have left him with lung scarring and made him physically unfit for task. Even ulcers can be cause for early seperation. Accidents and illness happen, after all.
Which leaves the psychological capability. The bit that really scares you.
It shouldn't. A lot of times a good man, a good soldier, simply cannot do the job any more. Either the killing part - or the being killed part. There is no shame in that at all, even though we all feel it. Believe me - I know, I have seen it, talked about it, deal with it even now (You don't turn your back on your unit. They cover your ass, you cover theirs, even after you leave) and felt it.
If it is this, you listen to him. Carefully. No poking or prying, he is going to feel like he let himself and his unit down. When he wants to talk about it, he will. You listen. You be his audience, his confessor, his rock. Just be there for him. If he needs some time alone from time to time, respect that need.
Tough job, yes, but sometimes it is needed.
Your man probably went through a tough time & does need your understanding where that is concern. I can’t say enough for the guy who puts his life on the line for me to sleep at night. Kudos to him for that. But I have to ask, is it the military part or his personality that has you walking on egg shells?
When my son left the Army (drill sgt) he was a control freak & a bit of an @$$hole. He always had confidence & wanted to be in charge, it was in his nature. His personality was less than desirable though. He went through a few failed relationships before I spoke up & said, “What girl wants to be treated like that? She is NOT in the military & doesn't take orders from you; she needs to be adored. ” I told him to soul search what he wants out of life & give that. I reminded him that communication, on both sides, was key if he wanted happily ever after. Many talks later, he’s now in a good relationship with a young woman who admires is loving nature.
Good luck!
As myself being the one who asked the question, im not exactly sure how to handle military men; we talk and get along just fine, I just have no idea how to handle his demeanor, he is an extremely private person to begin with and he feels that his relationship with me is stronger. But i have noticed that he finds it harder to open up with me (hence the eggshells)
Ah. Completely misread your question - sorry! It is a rare occurrance, but it does happen.
It'll take him a while to open up. When you are in, pretty much the only privacy you ever get is within the confines of your own skull. Takes a while to get used to talking about stuff openly again once you pop back to civilian life.
He should be fine in a couple of years, though he will probably always be slightly more reserved than you are used to, and a bit less tolerant of imperfection.
No need for eggshells here. You just be you. It will bring him out of his shell faster than you not saying a word.
As myself being the one who asked the question, im not exactly sure how to handle military men; we talk and get along just fine, I just have no idea how to handle his demeanor, he is an extremely private person to begin with and he feels that his relationship with me is stronger. But i have noticed that he finds it harder to open up with me (hence the eggshells)
I was under the impression that any medical discharge was considered an "Administrative Discharge." I may be wrong, though. Usually honorable discharges occur when the military member doesn't re-enlist.