Okay so I'm in the same boat over here, but I ALREADY made the mistake of lying about it. He knows I used to cut because of the scars on my arms, but the ones on my legs are so much worse that I lied about them... so what now?

I used to cut as well my wrist...and now I see the scars, yet I seem to be the only one that sees them. To me they always look huge and noticable, yet no one else seems to see them. So I rarely get asked about them. So yeah - most guys won't notice them on your legs, but to a boyfriend, you do need to be honest. And I have learned that you can be ashamed of them, or you can look at them as saying "these are scars now, meaning they are in the past. I am getting over this part of my life, and these will only ever be scars, no longer cuts". I'd rather see a scar on my wrist than a fresh cut, and I know all my family and friends feel the same way. Please know that if you ever feel that way, reach out to someone. Love and prayers for you.

@Cristie - Tell the truth now. Tell him that you were scared and so you lied, but you want to tell the truth because you care and want him a part of your life, which means being honest about the past.

I used to be a cutter, and I occasionally cut now. I think guys would be more freaked out by actual cuts than by scars. I know how bad scars can look though, my legs from the knees up are completely butchered. For me, there's so much else that is wrong with my body I have completely given up on ever getting a boyfriend, so my scars don't bother me in that aspect. The only time when they really bother me is when it comes to dressing and making sure no one can see them. However I think that if you are honest with the guy upfront, everything should be fine.

I am glad I'm not the only one with this problem. I have some really horrible scars on my legs from cutting. Unfortunately some are on my knees and shins where they are pretty noticeable. I have been dating a guy for a year and he's never asked about them. I have a really awful scar on my arm from a car accident and I think he assumes the scars on my legs are from the accident too. I decided I would tell him the truth if he asks but he hasn't asked thank God. That said, if he ever asks I'm going to explain to him that I had a lot of emotional problems when I was younger as a result of some pretty crappy stuff in my childhood, and I didn't know how to deal with my emotional pain in any other way. I had several years of intensive therapy since then and I understand now where my self destructive behavior came from. I don't expect I will ever do anything like that again and if i felt an urge to do it, I would seek help.

If you don't have a therapist now I'd really recommend you get one because cutting is a sign of extreme emotional trauma. You need help healing from that trauma. Once you are a whole person inside, you can deal with the questions.

I've never cut, but my best friend used to (and I never knew about it until years later) so all of these stories are making me really sad. I feel like if the guy really loves you, he should be able to accept your past, even the physical evidence of it. I wish you all love and the best of luck!

I've been asked, I told him that I didn't know how to handle my shit when I was younger, but I've since grown up and learned. I've learned from my past and am not ashamed of it.

I don't think they are that big a deal. There is a difference between fresh scars and old scars. Mature people know that sometimes bad sh*t went down in the past and now stays in the past. A good guy will overlook it and if after a while it doesn't re-emerge as an issue, it pretty much just fades into the background.