How old are you? I ask because I'm trying to figure out why you are letting other people make dating decisions for you. If you're under 18, I agree with your family, as do the laws of your state, so your 30-year-old boyfriend might want to make himself scarce. But I'm going to assume you're an adult.
We all want our families to like the people we choose to date or marry. Nothing wrong with that. But once we are adults, their approval shouldn't be necessary. Nice to have, but not necessary. If you still live at home, things get a little muddled; they can try to use the "my house, my rules" card even if you're over 18. Once you are grown and out of the house, though, it's your ball game and you can play it any way you like.
In other words, who cares if your family doesn't like the guy? It's not their decision; it's yours.
I don't know if their "big influence" in your life is because they demand it or because you allow it, but either way, it's time to cut the codependent cord and live your own life without worrying if they will approve. They might give you a hard time about it, but too bad. You're an adult, and they can suck it, Trebek.
The answer to your question, then, is this: do you like the guy? Then date him. Don't like him? Don't date him. Family doesn't like him? Boo-f**kedy-hoo.
It's not easy to date someone that your family doesn't like. If you live close to or with your family and like to spend a lot of time with them, it will be even more difficult. Both you and your date will feel uncomfortable and on the defensive whenever you are around them. If you choose to continue dating this man, be aware that this will cause a strain in the relationship you have with your family. That doesn't mean you shouldn't date him, though, if he is who you want to spend your time with. Just remember that you can't force your family to like your boyfriend. They have the right to choose how they feel about someone just as you do. Let's hope that you all can, at least, remain civil to one another and attempt to get along. If you continue to date him and fall in love with him, perhaps in time, your family will see some of his good qualities, and they will learn to like him as well. There is no guarantee that will happen, though, so proceed with caution. I would hope that your family has your happiness and your best interests at heart and that they are probably trying to protect you, but they can't make your decisions for you. That is up to you.
In many cases, age shouldn't make a difference, only what you and your partner want/expect. I dated a guy 6 years older than me, some approved, others didn't. But that wasn't what mattered. I dumped the guy because he was expecting a different level of relationship (moving in together, settling down, marriage) than what I was ready for.
Make the best decisions for yourself and know that those who care will always be around, even though situations may change.
In many cases, age shouldn't make a difference, only what you and your partner want/expect. I dated a guy 6 years older than me, some approved, others didn't. But that wasn't what mattered. I dumped the guy because he was expecting a different level of relationship (moving in together, settling down, marriage) than what I was ready for.
Make the best decisions for yourself and know that those who care will always be around, even though situations may change.
When I was 19 (and still living with my parents), I started dating a guy that was 34 years old. Actually, he turned 35 during our short-lived relationship.
Honestly, I was surprised when my parents didn't FLIP. They just wanted to meet him... so, we went for dinner. And, damned if the three of them didn't just have a blast! I realized, halfway through the meal, this was because they had more in common with him than I did. I mean, they were talking about episodes of M.A.S.H., but BEFORE it was in re-runs!
I managed to drag out the relationship another month, just to prove I could do it, I guess... but, in the end, that age difference was astronomical. And, if it was enough to make you break up with him once, you were probably making the right decision... regardless of family influence.
That said, if you are just looking to fool around, go for it! I'm sure he has lots of experience to share- just be safe.
It's hard when your family doesn't approve (unless you're living in two different cities or even states) because eventually you're going to feel split; the BF wanting holiday time and your mother wanting the same time but somehow one will get hurt no matter who you choose. While I realize that my family is astronomically strict compared to most, it's always better to hear them out as to why they don't like the guy. The age thing could just be an excuse to cover the real reason, but it could also be your age. My daughter's father dates 18 year olds all the time, and he's 38; he cannot figure out how come most of the time the girl's family doesn't like him. Duh!
(He's an idiot with a loose jaw, what can I say?)
If it isn't a good reason, look at your family. I went out with a P.K. whose family was less strict than mine. It really opened my eyes to a lot. Even though that relationship ended, it showed me that not everyone is so judgemental as them.
More than likely, they just don't want to see you get hurt.
Good luck.
When I was 19 I dated someone who was 32. We stayed together for 5.5 years. Age wasn't an issue, sure we made jokes about it and there were some horrible 70's/80's references that I didn't get...but I honestly didn't WANT to get them haha. My family had no real issue accepting him because they accepted me and respected the choices I made. They knew I was always a mature person and to find someone that you're compatible with is what's important. In the end we didn't work out because he wasn't mature enough emotionally for me and couldn't stick to his goals.
Now some things will come up because of the gap..like do you both want kids, what kind of future do you want, what sort of life experience do each of you have, baggage, etc. But honestly, that stuff is going to come up no matter what the age difference is.
The people who made comments about our relationship truly didn't know either of us. The people who saw us together, how happy we were, and how we got along so well didn't think for a moment about the age difference. They saw two people who cared deeply for each other.
Plus he looked like Paul Rudd...hello! hahaha