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If I hooked up with a guy off of craigslist does that make me pathetic?

It's only pathetic if you feel pathetic doing it. No one else's opinion really matters. I'm more concerned about the safety of it.

I'm sure you've heard news reports about people hooking up on Craigslist and one of them ending up dead. If you were my sister, I would tell you not to do it (or not to do it again if you've already done it), but you're not my sister, so I will instead tell you to be very careful meeting people on Craigslist. I don't know if you're looking for a date or quick sex--the phrase "hooked up" has many different meanings--but I wouldn't go anywhere privately with a stranger from the internet until you get to know him better. Public dates are one thing but don't go back to the guy's house the first or second time you get together. Take your time, get to know the guy so you can be sure he's not a psycho and you don't end up in the bottom of a well somewhere rubbing lotion on your skin.

My general opinion is that it's not a good idea. Too many things could go wrong. There are better ways to meet people.

Thanks for the question.

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4 Comments

goodkarmagirl

Agree, Cary. Though I'd like to add that meeting guys on Match.com, Plenty of Fish, eHarmony..whatever, are NOT automatically safer bets.
True, if a guy has to pay to upload a dating profile, he might have more invested than someone who puts up a free ad, but it doesn't mean they are less psycho.
I've met my share (and more) of weirdos on "valid" dating sites. No ax-weilding maniacs or, as Cary alluded to, cannibals, but a couple phone calls that, with subtle questions, inquire about where they work or groups they are involved with, or fun conversations about facebook, etc, and you have enough info to do a basic online search for the "real scoop".

You can get free info (don't pay right away for the $39.99 search info, you can find out addresses, potential relatives, employers by searching Linked In, Facebook, Spokeo and free "people search" sites.

If there is zero info to be found on him...consider it a red flag. Most sites, unless he has blocked everything from everyone, has SOMETHING, even a remote tidbit on someone if they have ever had a utility bill in their name.

You have every right to ask him his last name and what city he lives in....but maybe do it more casually than interrogation.

Not going to put my moral compass on you, but If you are hooking up sexually, after doing your homework, please let a good friend that you trust know where you are going, and ask her to text you at a specific time the next morning and expect a response within 30 minutes.
Safety is something you won't regret...and if your booty call is a real man, he shouldn't take any issue with it either.

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LOL nice...go on a date and get a top security investigation done all in one night.

goodkarmagirl

haha X....I'm referring to the "non-date" strictly hook up scenario. I don't usually go all CIA on guys I am seeing until the 3rd or 4th date... ;)

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Well, darn it, I always like to have the final adjudication by the 3rd date :P

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