Uh...Yes. That's a little concerning. I'm not saying he's cheating, but, uh, I can't think of another legitimate reason why he'd be Google Map-ing her address. Maybe he wants to send her a birthday card, saying hi and updating her on his wonderful marriage to his beautiful wife who he loves very much. Otherwise, I think he might be cheating. Or maybe looking to reconnect with an ex behind your back. At the very least, there is still enough interest on his part to find out where she currently lives.
I suppose he could be curious. But looking up her address? Seems more than a little suspicious. If she is some nutjob, Glen Close in Fatal Attraction stalker-type and he is worried that she might have moved to your neighborhood, then that's one thing. But I would imagine he would tell you if there was any danger of his ex boiling your pet bunny rabbit. If he's curious, why doesn't he just look her up on Facebook?
On the other hand, she's married. Maybe he was feeling nostalgic and wondering whatever happened to her. But I'm confused as to why he would also Google Map her husband. At the very least, it seems like he still has some feelings for her. Enough to warrant spending the time to cyberstalk her and her husband.
Usually I give people the benefit of the doubt, and it could just be curiosity. Maybe she crossed his mind one day, and he was like, "Hm, I wonder if Suzy still lives in the area." But getting her exact address on Google Maps? That seems more than a little strange. Looking her up on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, LinkedIn, Four Square, Classmates.com or any of the other many, many ways of finding people these days would be one thing. But Google Map-ing her seems a little suspicious.
If he says he's just curious, and you feel he is trust-worthy, give him a pass. But keep an eye out. Something feels rotten in Denmark (or wherever you live).
What do you guys think? Is this a red flag?
I suppose he could be curious. But looking up her address? Seems more than a little suspicious. If she is some nutjob, Glen Close in Fatal Attraction stalker-type and he is worried that she might have moved to your neighborhood, then that's one thing. But I would imagine he would tell you if there was any danger of his ex boiling your pet bunny rabbit. If he's curious, why doesn't he just look her up on Facebook?
On the other hand, she's married. Maybe he was feeling nostalgic and wondering whatever happened to her. But I'm confused as to why he would also Google Map her husband. At the very least, it seems like he still has some feelings for her. Enough to warrant spending the time to cyberstalk her and her husband.
Usually I give people the benefit of the doubt, and it could just be curiosity. Maybe she crossed his mind one day, and he was like, "Hm, I wonder if Suzy still lives in the area." But getting her exact address on Google Maps? That seems more than a little strange. Looking her up on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, LinkedIn, Four Square, Classmates.com or any of the other many, many ways of finding people these days would be one thing. But Google Map-ing her seems a little suspicious.
If he says he's just curious, and you feel he is trust-worthy, give him a pass. But keep an eye out. Something feels rotten in Denmark (or wherever you live).
What do you guys think? Is this a red flag?
Did he Google-map directions? Yes? Be suspicious.
Otherwise, probably just a meaningless curiosity.
Did he Google-map directions? Yes? Be suspicious.
Otherwise, probably just a meaningless curiosity.
Maybe he wanted to see her house on the satellite view so he could laugh about how much bigger y'all's house is?
Ok, no, it's weird. I'd call him on it.
I'd agree with this.
They say that "the best revenge is living well", and maybe he's just seeing if you guys are living better than she & her husband are. It always gives me a twisted sense of satisfaction when I find out that people I've broken up with aren't doing well--they're nothing without me! Or, on the other hand, the people I've broken up with that I still care about as human beings, I want to know that someone is taking good care of them, that they're living in a good place, etc.
I'd chalk that one up to plain old curiosity. Google maps are fun, and it's always kind of fun to see where people live. Who hasn't popped in an address for an ex see what comes up? It doesn't make him a stalker OR a cheater, IMO.
Just Google Mapping a house is no big thing... I do it all the time, looking at my house, my old house, and such just for kicks.
Now it there were directions involved at anytime, call him out. He has no business getting directions to an exs house.
Normally I tend to lean more towards paranoid (an old professor of mine used to day that, "Paranoia is having all the facts."), but honestly, this sounds like something I might do simply out of curiosity. However, I'm probably most likely to do it to someone I still think about sometimes, aka, someone I might not be completely over yet.
This is tough because I feel like it really could be either. Especially since I feel like it's more of a female thing than a male thing to do some light stalking "just because".
Either way, I don't blame the question-asker. I'd be offended if that were me. I would bring it up no matter what.
As the ladies above me, I would blame curiosity. That google street view thingy is amazing and you just end up googling all kinds of weird places like your granma's house, your childhood house or the last place you went on holydays.
Some Internet tools makes stalking so easy you sometimes end up doing something you would never do without a computer. Like looking up an ex to see what kind of house he/she lives in...
Is your husband completly oblivious to Internet cache files? If not, if he knows how to erase his traces on the web and didn't do it, my guess is he didn't have any bad intentions when he did it.
yes but was it that he was looking up addresses on top of hers? THAT would be curiousity, but if he only looked up her address, one address... thats a little weird, why would he choose to look up just her? if he did look up only her address, id ask why..
I'd defenitly ask about that, This is what I would think he's either planning to cheat or he is really curious to see where shes living and what shes up to, I know older men who do that.
If after more than 10 years (I assume you dated before tying the knot) she is still on his mind...that alone is alarming.
I think he still has feelings for her...unless they got back in touch recently...that is a different story.
However, that does not explain why he wants to know where she is.
I'd have a serious talk with this man and get some honest answers
Yeah, I get the curiosity factor. The whole Google Maps thing just seems weird to me. Looking up her address? Why not just search on Facebook or even the phone book if he wants to see if she's in the area? Who knows if he's cheating, but I think it's worth calling him out on.
But yes....If he has printed out directions to her house, along with directions to a seedy motel by the highway, you should definitely be concerned.
I wouldn't call him a cheater just yet, but I'd definitely call him on it. I want to know why he has her address anyway. Maybe it's just me but I don't know anyones address except mine and grandma's address, I don't have any written down or even saved anywhere so there is no way for me to use that google map thing. Unless he used to live there, with her then I'd see why he knows it.
Any way if you regularly clean out the history and he knows this and didn't bother to delete it then I would call him bold in his cheating or not cheating at all.
Just talk to him
Fuck yeah I'd be suspicious! There is absolutely no valid reason that I can come up for your husband to search for the address of his ex-girlfriend from over a decade ago...
I have to say that for the past couple of hours i have been hooked by the impressive posts on this blog. Keep up the great work.
I agree