My advice? Use condoms.
Now, for the pubes. Pubic hair is, at root, just hair. There are a few basic things you need to do, and the rest is all styling preferences. Remember that and a lot of anxiety goes away.
I would advise against shaving absolutely everything; that hair is there for a reason. It serves as a dry lubricant so you don't get a friction rash. Ask any two shaved lovers this and they'll tell you this is something they learned the hard way.
Give it a trim if it's unruly, give it a wash with a gentle soap or shampoo, but beyond that, how you style it is really up to you. The landing strip seems to be a popular style, but natural bush is also popular. To be honest, no hair at all is probably not necessary; the "bald" look only became popular because of porn (it's easier to see what's going on). The important thing is that you're comfortable and that you like how your pubes look.
Also, use condoms.
Perfect answer!
Maybe a slight trim to neaten things up might make you feel less self conscious?
If you're not use to shaving don't shave for the occasion!
Your skin won't have time to get used to it and you will probably get a rash.
(btw, sweat is the worst on freshly shaved areas!)
What ever you choose, don't do it like the night before you have sex. You might be one of those people gets razor burn or it might just irritate you a lot your first time. Start grooming now so that you can get a handle on razor burn or ingrown hairs or whatever the result is of grooming. Also you you can get comfortble with yourself down there.
I actually think the adice above its a bit misleading in terms of preferences. I'm not sure how old the reformed players, but i'm a young lady of 21 and I dont know of any friends of mine who would be caught with a full bush. They are things of the past, Ithink most guys expect you to either have it all gone and fresh or a small landing strip. That bald skin thing he was talking about?? I think its rather strange for a GUY to have all of his hair removed, so it really shouldnt be a concern at all. I guess it depends on how old you are, but if you're having sex with a guy who's under 25 I would say groom as much as possbile as long as you're comfortable.
I'm 23 and I've rocked my bush since I got it ^_^ I also have several friends who have left themselves completely natural, and similarly wouldn't be "caught" with a bald one.
Trust me, there are a lot of different kinds of people out there, and it's natural to assume that everyone else does the sorts of things our own social groups do, but I promise you that there are a lot of still natural women out there (I've been with a few!), who wouldn't shave or wax if you paid them!
I agree definately make sure you use condoms...I made the mistake of shaving everything before my first time and I had never shaved before. I got so many knicks and really bad razor burn. I would definately clean it up though. I took a human sexuality class while in college and all the guys in class said that they preferred some sort of clean up or all bare, but that is really up to you.
However, my mother always said if you can't feel comfortable talking about everything having to do with sex with the person you are about to do it with maybe you aren't ready. That is just how I was raised though, you along with many others might see this differently.
This is a great point! I think with most of my sexual partners either sometime before, or just after the first time, I asked (and one guy even asked MY preference in guys first) if they had any strong feelings about "the situation down there" LOL! I think all of them said they don't really care as long as it's clean and under control. I do know a lot of guys like the bare look though.
You should be able to talk to him about it. Just say, "In case we end up going any further, I was wondering if you had any preferences about how a girl keeps everything down there." You don't have to be serious about it, you can laugh and play coy, I don't think many guys would think it were all that weird that you were asking.
If do you want to remove hair (beyond a trim), try a wax instead of shaving!
It depends on your age, im 26 and i shave it all have been since high school and every guy ive been with loved it. all my girl friends shave most of it off, maybe only a landing strip left. being completely shaved makes us feel more confident and clean and ready for anything. I would say shave it all and see what he says, no guy would ever complain that you had no hair trust me. They might in the future say they like the landing strip look ect but that's mostly just the older guys that like the hair look. I assume your younger so shave it all/wax it all/ or just do a landing strip and you will be fine. As for the full bush look IT IS NOT POPULAR that's just nasty.
I have to disagree with you on two points.
1. Not every guy likes bald. I've had a few mention that no hair down there smacks pre-pubescence. *awkward*
2. I know a few guys who like the full bush for various reasons, it's more 'natural', it's 'retro', it smells nice (???). Haha, men.
Hell, one of my friends openly proclaims that he love hairy armpits, and although I protest with exaggerated facial expressions of disgust, he won't be moved on the subject!
Not to sound rude but how old are you? guys my age and younger like less hair the better, ive asked tons of guys in that age range that question and i always get the same answer. at the most they want a landing strip and that closely trimmed. men are pretty basic, they like what they see in porn and that is mostly no hair or a landing strip. its what they are trained to think is good just like women are trained to know what a nice womans body should look like by looking at magazines when they are growing up.
You do sound rude.
And your question is irrelevant.
I personally don't believe that men and women are so easily influenced by porn and glossy magazine adverts.
exactly, your probably older so men your age like hair because thats what they grew up seeing in MAGAZINES. lol and you might not believe it but its sadly true that peoples idea of beauty comes from what they see in the media these days. Next time leave the sex advice question from a younger woman TO a younger woman. If she wanted advice from her mother she would have asked. that rude enough for ya?
LMAO
I'm 26,
I've shaved since I was 17 because I like feeling 'clean'.
I never read cosmo as a teen.
I have a broad range of friends who aren't so superficial.
Birds of a feather sweetie, not everyone is brainwashed into mainstream - grow up.
26 my ass, whatever mom. No one mentioned cosmo magazine. and yes I am glad none of my guy friends like a harry bush or harry armpits, no thanks. If that's what your definition of non mainstream friends is LOL. Pretty sure if this girl was dating one of those kind of guys she wouldn't have asked the question. and superficiality has nothing to do with shaving or not shaving lol. Honestly i enjoy our arguments especially how your screen name is Christina Hendricks who is hideous lol, The only thing she ever did well was the Firefly series.
I think a trim is good. You can go somewhere like Target and find these bikini trimmers. It's like a haircut for your nether regions, lol. It will trim the hair really short but you won't have the irriation that you would with shaving or waxing. Trust me, I have sensitive skin, I've tried it all and this is what works best, at least for me.
Good luck!
I use one of those too, as my skin reacts terrible to shaving! It works really well...now onto styling tips. To be honest, the last guy I was with didn't seem to really care. He was in bed with a naked chic!! I don't think he was really going to complain, haha...and he kept coming back, so I don't think my "styling" was too much of a bother. Just relax and enjoy yourself! Do what feels right for you
Sigh. I genuinely don't know why everyone here advises to "just trim a little" or to "neaten it up" when a) they don't know what he'd actually prefer and b) it's clearly never bothered the girl in the first place, so why is she now supposed to for her man's approval? A man who probably loves her for who she is, and wants her body regardless of whether it is minus a few strands of hair.
Ridiculous, it's just ridiculous. Why is the answer never JUST to do what you feel comfortable with? Or to do what you want? Why is it always to trim? Statistically, perhaps men of a certain age prefer it, but trimming or waxing pubic hair is something that is ALWAYS dependent on their own personal situation, considering the varying degrees to which this goes, with some people thinking it looks pedophilic and some people thinking it's supersexy.
In my own personal situation, if one of my ex girlfriends had ever tried to impress me with a shave or a trim, I'd think they were lacking in self confidence and something was wrong, which isn't exactly sexy. And I'm not advocating going au naturel either, just that it is always always down to the individuals and standard advice should not be "just trim it a little" because either he or she could absolutely hate even that, like I do, like a lot of people I know do.
Umm, she IS asking for advice. I don't see this as a lack of confidence on her part just a lack of experience with the subject. I agree that she should do what she is comfortable with. Obviously from the replies to this post there are many ladies who prefer many different "styles".
Also, your A and B contradict each other. In one statement you are saying she doesn't know what her partner would like (assuming that that is something she should know) and in the next statement saying she shouldn't care to have his approval.
Just sayin'.
I know she's asking for advice! ^_^ I'm saying that the answer TO that advice should not automatically be to trim. It's a very individual matter, and the advice given should always be to do what you're comfortable with, and to have one stock response of TRIM IT is a bit short-sighted. Trust me, it comes up a lot here.
And in a loving relationship those things aren't mutually exclusive. She shouldn't do it solely because he wants her to, and clearly in the past, and just for herself it's not been something she's wanted to do. However, if it doesn't go against what she's comfortable with, then it might be a lovely thing to ask him what he'd personally like. It's nice to do things like this for your partner, if you don't mind and they'd love it. But doing it just because he might expect it, well, that is a bit of a lack of confidence.
And yes, in a mature relationship where these things are discussed openly and honestly, you'd think if they were having sex then they'd have talked about this sort of thing. I know I would talk to my partner about problems and issues with my partner. It's kind of obvious, isn't it? ^_^
Just clarifyin'.
Okay, I completely agree with 'it's her choice, she shouldn't do it based on only her boyfriends wants if she is uncomfortable with it." etc. But you are criticizing peoples opinions on a comments/advice section of an internet advice column. Seems pretty ridiculous to me.
You shouldn't be complaining about all of these people saying that it should be trimmed/cut/waxed just as they shouldn't complain about your opinion that being untrimmed is good. Post your advice and preferences and stop poking holes into other peoples opinions or complaining that not enough people think like you.
If someone directly takes issue with your opinions or begins an argument, fine, argue against their opinion, but post what you think and stop being one of those youtube posters who complain about 'wrong' opinions. You consistently post that it should be her choice, opinions differ, etc but you post negative responses to the opinion that differs from yours and positive responses to the opinions that agree with you. Obviously you are trying to argue your way of thinking and claim that it is the better way in your opinion, and there is nothing wrong with that as that is exactly what individualism and opinion is there for.
So stop being so high and mighty on those who are doing the same thing, many of them don't even argue against having hair and just state that they prefer to wax or trim as that is called 'advice'. If you are talking to someone you know about whether or not they should buy the new car or get the new haircut or even paint a room, you will have a preference that you will express and your friend can make up their own mind. If you constantly tell your friends "Look, do it for yourself, it shouldn't matter what society has taught us to like or what my opinion is, make your own call. Those people who tell you what you should do are wrong and shouldn't put pressure on you towards a certain decision." I hope they get very frustrated as I hope they are at least semi-mature and can use opinion to help their own thought process and invite opinion as it gives you new information and ways of looking at situations.
In short, there is no 'right' answer to someone asking for an opinion. If you think there is then I am terribly concerned.
If you're going to start saying things like arguing on the internet is ridiculous, I probably would delete that before typing four paragraphs of your own in response ;)
Still, I really don't think you actually read what I wrote properly. Or at least don't quite understand the sentiment, because you're arguing for the same thing I am. Opinion is wonderful, but acting like you speak for your entire sex or gender is not.
My PERSONAL opinion is that it's best to just leave it, as I've stated, but I entirely respect anyone's choice to do whatever they want to themselves. HOWEVER, it should not be automatic to suggest a trim. It should be automatic to suggest doing whatever feels most comfortable, not whatever is currently fashionable.
You have to read these things carefully. I'm not saying that advice shouldn't be given, especially when it's from personal experience. But there is a huge difference between saying "Trim it, men like that" and "Trim it if you want, most men might prefer it, but only do it if you feel comfortable." The first one is a very rigid and flawed answer, and the second takes into account the variety of different kinds of people.
Yes, I do criticise people's opinions, when they're not actually expressing an opinion but trying to pass it off as fact. Something like "ALL MEN HATE HAIR" is an "opinion" that is just not true, or correct, and trying to pretend like you as an individual speak for everyone makes it not an opinion, but a false fact. These are the opinions I have a problem with. They are not opinions, but individuals trying to speak for everyone, and I won't be spoken for by someone else.
The people who have stated they prefer to wax or shave, I have absolutely no problem with, and love that different people like different things and nowhere, absolutely nowhere, will you find me arguing with the people who express their own opinions AS their own opinions, instead of trying to speak for everyone. I have no problem with the person who says they prefer waxing. I have a problem with the person who says that EVERYONE should prefer waxing. Do you see the difference there?
(And I don't understand why people making their own decisions is somehow a bad thing. None of my friends are the kind of people who would need to be told that they need to make their own decisions; they're the kind of people who automatically make their own decisions. We're not a particularly media/celebrity driven lot.)
Grrr. Why for guys nowadays is bush a 'fetish', and shaved/waxed is normal?? It's frustrating. Also, that whole being entirely hairless thing sucks too. And again it's considered 'fetish' or the guy is to be commended for not minding when girls have some hair *gasp!*
I usually shave around the lips through to my inner thigh and then just sort of let the rest sit, maybe a little trimming into shape, rarely... if hes into giving oral he'll probably appreciate it, heh. :P
I like to get oral from my guy, so if you like it also I suggest keeping the entire area as smooth and clean as possible--with a landing strip of course! Then you will be screaming with delight, and he will be deep sea diving with you very often-I promise!