I understand you feel rejected.
But I really don't think your boyfriend was rejecting you. More likely, in a clumsy way, I think he was trying to tell you that he likes you for you. Not for your ethnicity. I mean, let's reverse the situation. What if he were to ALWAYS comment about how he loves Asian women. Just loves them. I know creeps like that. Men who talk about women as if they're fresh produce. Personally, I find it disturbing to hear dude friends of mine obsess over a woman's ethnicity. It's... dehumanizing? Vaguely racist? The pathetic mumblings of a perpetual virgin?
I'm fairly sure he's trying to prove to you that he's not dating you because of your heritage. He's probably dating you because you're rad.
True that! At least he doesn't have Yellow Fever. He likes you for you!!
I had a boyfriend once who went on and on about how much he loved small Asian girls...well, I'm not Asian or small, even at that time; I'm white and kind of tall, and at the time considered thin. It got to the point where he decided that I just wasn't doing it for him, and he left me for an Asian chick.
Point is, what your b/f is doing isn't very respectful. A person is more than her ethnicity. Tell him to cut it out. He has a right to his preferences, but he shouldn't be constantly (and indirectly) cutting down the person he's supposed to love the most. After all, he wouldn't like it if you were always saying, "You know, I don't usually dig white guys/basketball players/green eyes/video-game addicts," or whatever he happens to be. If he doesn't like it, too bad. You have the right to be happy in the relationship, too.
I think the boyfriend is giving the LW a hint. My ex-husband did the same to me. I wasn't his type physically, and all he did was point out hot chicks to me. My ex was refusing to have sex with me, claiming that I was too fat, even though I was well within BMI limits. I ended up dumping him for another guy who had no problem getting it up with me. My ex kept calling and asking why I left. I told him that he should be happy because he was finally free to find the hottie of his dreams and get laid. He was so angry that he hung up on me, only to call back twice in tears!!
Tough $h!t, loser!
hey, i feel you. I'm of half Asian descent and my boyfriend was constantly pointing out blonde girls he considers hot, who were admittedly gorgeous but appeared the exact opposite of me in every regard. I finally told him how it made me feel rejected and that I didn't get to choose what I look like, only how my character/heart develops. To be fair,he's the product of his environment coming from a very small, very predominently Caucasian town. And while he doesn't say things like that I(in front of me) anymore, i can see that he'll never really understand why that's hurtful as he's not made any attempt to learn about my experience and is still prone to (sometimes unconscious) racist/prejudice crutches. I don't care how funny you think you're being, breaking out a bad Middle Eastern/Jamacian/etc accent is not ever okay; he's dunzo. But I hope your guy will listen and really change! There are smart guys out there, some people just don't know what they don't know. Others are perma-jerks.