if neither of you are serious about your religions, don't let other people tell you how to have a religious life for you and your future kids. you, and only you, decide how they will be raised.

(religious issues are a sensitive topic to me so i apologize if my comment is a bit blunt)

My mother is Catholic and my father is Jewish. My parents decided to raise me Jewish and, growing up, I got a lot of crap from kids at Religious School about 'not being Jewish' b/c my mom wasn't. I know, right? Kids suck...

Anyway, after talking to the Rabbi at out Temple, my parents and I decided that I would go through a conversion! I went to the Mikvah (a ceremonial bath) and converted to Judaism! It didn't change who I was at all, but it gave me credibility in standing up to my tormentors... it was wonderful!

So, if you guys decide to get married and raise you kids Jewish, there are other options for them that don't involve giving up your background. Don't let his family change that!!

oh hell to the no. MMs right. big no no and no. i changed my religion for a man thinking the same thing, i didn't really care much about the notion at the time, i just cared about him and that was the easiest slash not so best way to do it. and what MM said is EXACTLY what happened, they started running things with me as soon as we got serious which is when i put the kibosh on it.

If you guys are only boyfriend and girlfriend then doesn't this seem a LITTLE premature???? I could see the family saying that if y'all were married and getting ready to actually HAVE kids... but you're not! Besides, it's none of their business how you raise your children - that's up to you and your boyfriend.

I'm on board with Caitlin--there will be options for your kids if they take a liking to either religion, but it'll also be difficult for them if they grow up with kids who are part of a definite community.

It's definitely possible that your in-laws are difficult and controlling for the sake of it, but as Jews they might have an additional issue: children that grow up in a secular Christian society--like the U.S., Canada, and much of Europe--will grow up with much more knowledge of the Christianity and Catholicism than of Judaism.

I mean, even if they aren't going to Mass, they'll probably get presents on Christmas, and go to the Santa Clause parade. Unless it's explicitly taught to them, they'll have no knowledge of Judaism.

To his parents, this is a huge loss. I'd guess that they imagined their children lighting Hanuka candles and having Bar Mitzvas.

I'm not saying that you and your boyfriend should suddenly start to care about religion, or change to meet their expectations, but I just wanted to let you know that it might not just be about THEM controlling YOU. They might genuinely be hurting.

I hate when people try to press their views on others. MM's right. You need to live your life for you - the way you want to live it. If others don't like it, tough. They're going to have to deal. You shouldn't do something just to appease someone else.

You're not even engaged. They have no business pushing this on you yet. When you are engaged, it's still you and your boyfriend's decision not theirs. MM is right. The children can decide when they're old enough. I know a couple with two children where the wife is catholic and the husband is Jewish and they are living a wonderful life.

My family is Catholic, but my boyfriend and I are agnostic(though I was baptized into and practice Catholicism for my family's sake). My parents suggest every now and then that I bring him to mass, but they say that aren't trying to convert him, or anything. Though, I do think they would want him to convert if we ever got married. They definitely want me raising my kids in the Catholic church, but I'm not thinking that far ahead. :P

haha that is like my parents situation. They compromised and taught us about both religions . They then had me chose what I wanted to be when I was old enough . My family goes to both the Synagogue and Mass at Church.. I even brought my Jewish dad a lupa ( little she wolf statue ) from Rome that was blessed by the Pope XD It feels awesome that I know more about both religions than most kids i go to college with :)

I dated a Jewish guy once and HE asked if I would consider converting. At the time I considered it because I'm not religious and I didn't care one way or the other, but now I'd say NO WAY. My lack of religion is just as sacred to me as his faith, and I want to keep it!

At the end of the day the relationship is between you and your bf so his family should learnt to butt out and let your relationship run its course

And MM is right as you soon as you give in to their demands then other demands will most likley sure to follow on how you should raise your children according to their standards not yours