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I'm getting ready to move in with my boyfriend, do I really need to ask his opinon on every household decision from now on ? Like how to decorate our bathroom ? Would this be rude if I just went ahead and purchased and did it ?

You know, you need to ask certain questions, but maybe not the ones you think. For instance, you mostly need to find out what rooms or decisions your boyfriend wants to be involved in. More than a few of us couldn't care about home decor so long as it doesn't look like Rainbow Brite and Josie & The Pussycats use the house as their headquarters.

Plus, you might be dating a guy who does have some ideas about the living room and bathroom. You need to be upfront about this stuff to avoid the argument that comes with a pink bathroom with butterfly accents all over it. While all men hate getting their Johnson stuck in a door, we REALLY hate going into a bathroom built for queens.

With that said, it would be totally rude to go out and buy stuff without consulting the person you're choosing to live and share breathing space with. If only to avoid the arguments, you should want to ask. If not, why in the hell would you be willing to live with somebody if you'd rather not discuss certain things? Like decor, which you both will have to look at for the duration of the time you live together, be it one month or eternity.

Or to infinity and beyond.

Whatever.

It was written.

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8 Comments

Meepa

If worse comes to worse just go get a home magazine or something like that where there's many many pics of different room set ups and each of you go through in your spare time mark the room styles you like then rip out the pages BOTH of you marked and then use those to decide mutually what will be used in decorating rooms.

Of course feel free to get a bit girly with stuff that's personally yours like your dresser top or something like that. I did this with a guy I had moved in with and lived with for almost 3 years and it was fine... well the decorating part was fine the relationship fell apart because he stopped caring and pointed a gun at me.

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My ex had to have the house his way. Not that I wanted ultra-feminine furnishings, but he didn't want any trace of anything feminine; even certain shades of blue threatened him. I wasn't even allowed to have my dolls out. He also insisted on keeping out these horrendous Ewok soap holders in the bathrooms at all times--they were butt ugly but when I tried to put them away he said I was controlling.

prettylady

Ummmm dolls? Did anyone else read this and be like who would want dolls all over their appartment?? Creepyville! I would take Ewok soap dishes any day over creepy dolls.. maybe I've seen too many Chuckie moves or something lol.

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This is an ultra easy fix. Go get one of the home mags, you know one with all those pics of different homes and room styles? Then in each of your own spare time mark the ones you like. Later find all the ones you both marked and make choices from them. Both of you are bound to like the results as both of you picked mutually liked designs.

But however do feel free to girl up some of your more personal things like your dresser top with music boxes or whatever you collect, allow him to do the same on his and both of you have your own personal spaces to decorate up how you want anytime.

user-pic

There are lots of home magazines that can help you. And don't forget to listen for suggestions from people especially your boyfriend.

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Get a place of your own, then you don't have to worry about getting approval from your boyfriend. Those type of decisions should be made by husband and wife, not for shack-ups. Why degrade yourself, have him respect you or better yet, you need to start respecting yourself. If he really wants to be with you and loves you, then he will marry you, not just "rent you" or use you until he finds another woman who will shack up with him. You are worth more than a "shack-up".

prettylady

Its not degrading to move in with a guy, you crazy dude! Most people who marry follow this order: meet, date, move in, get engaged, get married. Guys who want to move in are taking a relationship to the next level. They're seeing if the lady is compatible to live with before he proposes. Its important to see if someone is compatible in a home before you ask them to spend the rest of your life sharing one... I dont know where you're from but I've never heard anyone be so cynical about moving in with someone!

prettylady

Its not degrading to move in with a guy, you crazy dude! Most people who marry follow this order: meet, date, move in, get engaged, get married. Guys who want to move in are taking a relationship to the next level. They're seeing if the lady is compatible to live with before he proposes. Its important to see if someone is compatible in a home before you ask them to spend the rest of your life sharing one... I dont know where you're from but I've never heard anyone be so cynical about moving in with someone!

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