I'm sleeping with a guy who has girlfriend. we meet regularly and it has been 9 months since the first time. i had a crush on him from the first day i saw him and i did not know he has a girlfriend until oneday in bed and she called him.I feel so bad for her but i just couldn't reject when he ask for meeting.
Dan Seitz answered this question on
August 31, 2012 12:10 PM
Sure you can. It's easy to reject him. You tell him "I'm sorry, I can't be a part of hurting somebody else."
You can turn him down. You've got a moral imperative to turn him down. I'm not saying you have to talk to his girlfriend, but unless he's got blackmail photos, you've got zero obligation here. Dump him. It's that simple.
You feel bad for her yet you keep having sex with her boyfriend? Your meetings should have stopped the instant you found out. I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't judge but, it's women who do these kinds of things that give the rest of us a reason to fear while in relationships. Place yourself in that girl's position, how would you feel knowing the other woman knew of your existence? It makes the situation that more worse. Sure, if that guy wants to cheat he'll do it no matter what but c'mon ladies, common courtesy hands off someone else's guy.
So, this is confusing. Imagine for a second that this guy has been seeing both women. They are both in a relationship with him, and unaware that there's another woman. Now, they simultaneously find out about each other.
Which woman should be the one to end things because they feel bad for the other woman and don't want to be sleeping with "her" boyfriend?
What if one woman finds out the day before the other. Should she be the one to break up?
She didn't say she was his girlfriend though... she said he had a girlfriend- implying it wasn't her, she's just sleeping with him. By context of the question, it's not her guy.
Umm, both. Because who wants to be in a relationship with a cheat?
you don't feel bad for her, you feel guilty over what you are doing and are projecting it onto her. you feel bad that you are involved with a man who has other commitments that he obviously cares more about than making things exclusive with you. the girl doesn't need your pity sweetheart, she needs you to get off her man. a man that she was able to get a commitment from, something you haven't been able to accomplish. stop thinking so little of yourself that you are willing to accept the title of "the other woman" and go find yourself a man that will put you in the #1 spot.
what,s his first name? and does he live in Columbus,Oh.
Oh good grief! 1. The Guy isn't married. No reason for this girl to feel guilty. 2. It isn't the responsibility of all women to make him keep his hands off just because he has a girlfriend - no one owns him & he's responsible for his own choices & behavior. It's That being said, he doesn't sound like a nice Guy - definitely not worth fighting over so date who you want and keep your options open, you can do better.
Oh good grief! 1. The Guy isn't married. No reason for this girl to feel guilty. 2. It isn't the responsibility of all women to make him keep his hands off just because he has a girlfriend - no one owns him & he's responsible for his own choices & behavior. It's That being said, he doesn't sound like a nice Guy - definitely not worth fighting over so date who you want and keep your options open, you can do better.
I know it sounds like I am totally a slut and selfish bitch that just can not get my hands off another girls man. but I really like him even thought i know he is definitely not a good guy and not a right choice to get a commitment with. i just cant control myself and i swear it never happened before. i lost all my Intellectual and moral. at the begining i feel so guilty because it is so not me. i was struggling and wanted to stop seeing him. but then he starts to tell the problem between he and his girlfriend. and i also can feel he wants to know me more (but i refused to open my heart to him because i am so afraid to get things complecated ,this kind"only keep sexully connection"logic make me less guilty)and i i dont know if he is right now making a choice between she and I , I just want to be with him and make him happy , that is all. I never want to destroy their relationship.and I never tried to do something evil. i am leaving the choice to him (maybe he never wanted to make a choice and just playing me) so struggling!!! and feel myself cheap!
Don't you think you deserve someone who loves you and is proud to take you out and show you off? Not someone who only wants you around when he needs to get it in? Obviously if he hasn't left her NINE MONTHS later he is not interested in a relationship or trying to get to know you more...just your vagina. Any man that does that is a loser who isn't worth your time. I don't know you, but I do hope you find what you need :)
Um, HELLO? You absolutely CAN control yourself. If you really can't then I suggest you seek therapy. Please RUN AWAY from this guy. If he cheated on her then he will absolutely cheat on YOU. Why put yourself in that situation? You said you want to make him happy... well what about YOU? Don't you want to be with someone who will treat you well and make YOU happy? Come on. Move along from this piece of crap. Have some self respect.
No need to get down o
n yourself & DO NOT call yourself nasty names. You didn't do anything wrong & YOU didn't make any PR
onuses to the gf - he did. Just be true to yourself - you do deserve to be happy. It's not your job 2 worry about some woman you don't even know. I'd still keep your options open though if you continue to see him - doesn't sound like he's committed. To anyone so you shouldn't be either.
No need to get down o
n yourself & DO NOT call yourself nasty names. You didn't do anything wrong & YOU didn't make any PR
onuses to the gf - he did. Just be true to yourself - you do deserve to be happy. It's not your job 2 worry about some woman you don't even know. I'd still keep your options open though if you continue to see him - doesn't sound like he's committed. To anyone so you shouldn't be either.
If he cheats with you, he'll cheat on you.
Get a STD test and quit behaving like a tramp and move on
He's commited to the girl living with him. He obviously needs more sex or th girl he's living with is doing something right. You are the side piece. I used to be you. Now I'm the girl you feel "bad" for. I'm the girlfriend and your the reason why I have to act like it's okay "your single hunny, were not garried" grrrr!
He's commited to the girl living with him. He obviously needs more sex or th girl he's living with is doing something right. You are the side piece. I used to be you. Now I'm the girl you feel "bad" for. I'm the girlfriend and your the reason why I have to act like it's okay "your single hunny, were not garried" grrrr!
ok. Thanks for all the comments . he just broke up with me on skpye by leaving message saying that he want to stop meeting for " a while" because that his gf is checking his phone and fb. and he said he feels bad and he cares about me and dont want to hurt anybody.then he said he likes to be with me and wish he can talk to me and he ask me to meet in a cafe next week.WTF!!!! i dont care if he is really on a fight with his GF or he wants stop meeting like forever or temporarily. i have deleted all the contacts with him on FB and phone and skype now . and i am travelling from next week. feel little sad now but i think i can recover from it soon.
ok. Thanks for all the comments . he just broke up with me on skpye by leaving message saying that he want to stop meeting for " a while" because that his gf is checking his phone and fb. and he said he feels bad and he cares about me and dont want to hurt anybody.then he said he likes to be with me and wish he can talk to me and he ask me to meet in a cafe next week.WTF!!!! i dont care if he is really on a fight with his GF or he wants stop meeting like forever or temporarily. i have deleted all the contacts with him on FB and phone and skype now . and i am travelling from next week. feel little sad now but i think i can recover from it soon.
Sorry people.. This is how I met my husband.. She didnt appreciate him and I di. He is very happy now.. Its been 10 years and he not going no where.. If you want him keep your legs closed.. He come with a ring!
Sorry people.. This is how I met my husband.. She didnt appreciate him and I di. He is very happy now.. Its been 10 years and he not going no where.. If you want him keep your legs closed.. He come with a ring!
This is how I met my husband.. Honestly if u love him walk away.. if he loves u he will find u with a ring in hand!!