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Is going to a dominatrix ballet class cheating? It would just be about the discipline/structure/catharsis and learning ballet. I'm planning on asking my bf if it's ok , but I just won't do it at all if it seems likely that he'll not trust me if i ask.

Um. What the heck is dominatrix ballet class? More information please. Is it like Swan Lake in leather and gag balls?

Many moons ago, I wrote a blog post about how I can't stand classes that teach women how to dance like a stripper. The very nuanced piece was titled Get Rid Of Your Stripper Pole (Unless You're A Stripper)

That blog post won my all kinds of female fans. I even got an e-mail from CRAZYBAT CAPS LOCK. She was very upset at my premise, my prose, and my very existence. But i suppose she had a point: there are women out there who enjoy stripper classes. They do it for themselves to feel sexier, and to exercise. I believe you when you say, then, that there are reasons you'd take a class called "dominatrix ballet" other than sexual.

That said, you answered your question. Ask your boyfriend if he's comfortable with this. Explain why you want to take it. I'm sure he'll be cool with it. But if he's not cool... Well, look, cheating is dishonesty. If he tells you he doesn't want you artfully paddling and pirouetting because he hates the thought of you doing something quasi-sexual outside of the relationship, and you agree and then go out and do it anyway... that's cheating.

Would he also be an overreacting control freak? Yes. It's still cheating. So talk to him. He has to trust you if you're open. Just ask him before you sign up.

[UPDATE: I didn't even notice that Nick had just been asked this question. And so now, this question has been answered twice. No more dominatrix ballet questions, ladies.]

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33 Comments

Nick Nadel

There can never be too many dominatrix ballet class questions.

No

LOL! I think this is the first time I've ever seen this happen! :)

malorla

Guyspeakers, head to head..... 3,2,1, fight!
Looks like the questioner was hedging her bets... Nice work, both of ye. Dominatrix ballet classes.... what will they think of next?!

Sophie Jean

Why would she think it's cheating? It's a class that she'd be taking to please her man, right? Sounds to me that she must be omitting some truth (i.e. getting her rocks off on the experience), otherwise she wouldn't be feeling so guilty and questioning whether or not it's cheating. In my experience, when a girl wants to take a class to learn some new tricks for the bedroom, she doesn't have to let him know until she surprises him with said tricks. In my opinion, it's not much different then going out to buy some toys or lingerie to spice up the love-making.

kittycollins

i bet it was two different ladies in the exact same predicament. this is one of those "is he cheating?/am i fat?" things that all women occasionally wonder about.

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