I much prefer jello - fake cheese is simply revolting.
Some guys like a bit of distance. A little bit of peace and quiet. Know I do, for one! Now, there are two possible explanations for wanting a touch of distance in the relationship in the early stages.
Reason 1: He is not all that into you just yet. No crime, especially if he has been badly burnt before, but something to keep your eye on. Everyone says that guys get over breakups quickly - well, they don't. It takes about as long for a guy to get over things as it does a gal. Sure, they'll be out and dating faster, but the trust thing takes a hell of a long time to heal. Guys just don't talk about it, not even to other guys. Dumb, sure, but just the way most of us roll.
Reason 2: He trusts you totally and can be himself. Do you know how nice it is to be lucky enough to find an independant woman? One who can simply sit and be with you without much chat.
Have you ever watched a couple of guys who are old friends sitting together? Half the time they don't have a conversation, just snatches of random chat with usually a grunt as a reply.
That is not being uncommunicative, that is really how guys talk when they are relaxed with someone they trust. Nearly all the conversation is non verbal.
So - two possible reasons. I don't know your new guy, so really don't know which one it is.
Wow I found this very insightful. Thanks MM.
Flowers are way cool…, not sure if it means he’s nuts about you. Like a guy who opens your car door. He’s not nuts about you, he’s a gentleman & it’s just his style. Way cool…, just the same.
"Everyone says that guys get over breakups quickly - well, they don't. It takes about as long for a guy to get over things as it does a gal. Sure, they'll be out and dating faster, but the trust thing takes a hell of a long time to heal."
Thank you - this explains a lot that I have been wondering about. And this is why I adore Guyspeak and MM...
"That is not being uncommunicative, that is really how guys talk when they are relaxed with someone they trust. Nearly all the conversation is non verbal." -> Bahahaha... And this would probably be the time when we women talk their ears off in the relationship. :)
Almost invariably.
i'm the asker, perhaps new was the wrong word, it's been a few months, but it's still new enough to me to be asking the question. he's definitely a needs his space type, but i am too so that actually works out just fine. now he's away on business till may and its just gah not helping with the communication. when we are communicating he's hysterical and brilliant and i can't take my eyes off him, but i also wasnt expecting to miss that and that's kind of throwing me for a loop too. i have read this answer a LOT of times lol and i realized i don't know which reason i'd prefer at this point. but as usual, amazing insight and just the dose of perspective i needed! thanks MM, and thank you also for the support of the jello movement!
Go for the second reason.
Both reformed players - Dan and John - are professional comedy writers. Amit is a comedy writer. I also write comedy from time to time. Nick, Carrie and Panama are professional writers who are simply brilliant people and spellbinding speakers and writers (as you have already noticed).
One comment that comes up in chatting - it is so nice to simply not be on stage once in a while! And where better to relax than with a loved one?
yes i've noticed. the writing is addictive here, and i'm a writer so take that for what its worth lol i think this is the only place in all of gods creation where i would actually hope for a #2 from a man. this perspective is so amazing, thank you. and unfortunately the more grown up our lives are, the more that down time is needed too, right. duh! we both do live those kind of "on" lives but so differently, so that, may actually be the nail on the head my friend. jello-cup?
Yep, thats about it. Just different ways of downtiming.