Men want more than just sex. It's not like we want it all the time. Just, say, 51% of the time. I arrived at that conclusion using highly scientific means.
So the guys you talked to were only partially right. But in our defense: can you blame us? Look at you. Women are amazing. You'd be near singularly obsessed with you if you were a man. Women look pretty, smell nice, and feel real good. They are strong in ways men are weak, smart in ways men are stupid, and frequently, at least in my experience, are apt at reminding me of truths I either chose to ignore or are to proud to accept.
So, yeah, we want sex. Have you had it? It's awesome. It's Mother Nature's fault for making it so much damn fun. But as I said, while a majority of our brain cells are dedicated to popping little brain cell boners, we do have space in our skull for other pursuits. By my calculations, men want something else other than sex 49% of the time.
Don't believe me? Here is a very short, off the cuff list of ten things we want, in addition to, sex:
1. Chili cheese dogs
2. World Peace (mostly)
3. A roll of loot we can peel bills from
4. Fear and/or respect
5. Spartan Abs
6. A jetpack
7. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2
8. A good job that we're good at
9. A boat, a boombox, and a blender
10. Chili cheese dogs (I'm hungry)
It feels so good to prove my well-thought out points. See? Ten things we want that's not sex.
DeVore - you never cease to keep me in stitches. This is excellent. LOVE it.
It's a good thing that women also want it. Pretty much, always. :) (So much for that stereotype!)
Totally!
I *LOVE* men! And all their idiosyncrasies. We all have our tolerance levels, but for the most part - absolutely fucking delicious!
So in other words all they do want from women is sex. You can do everything else without women, except the world peace part. LAME on your part
Oh, Mander, anger causes digestive problems. I worry about you. Take little breathes. Have some chai tea. With soy, if you're lactose intolerant. Me? I'm totally lactose tolerant.
What were we talking about?
Well its very frustrating and I'm tired of men being able to just have sex w/out showing emotions or care for women. It's not a fair trade after women put so much emotions into sex (we can't help it) and that's why we always get hurt. I wish men could recognize that and take that into account.
Ahh, just cause a guy doesn't show any emotion or care after sex doesn't mean that he doesn't get hurt either. Girls are just more prone to showing it and guys are just more use to hiding it. Yes, I believe that guys often end up more hurt than girls do, especially after sex, but media makes them feel like they have to act that way. And just cause often times they come off cold and heartless after sex doesn't mean they don't care about you either.
Sure, it would be AMAZING to have a guy express himself more freely with you, especially when you two have had sex like that...but truth is, I believe guys are alot more insecure than girls are. They feel like they're suppose to be some tough, strong and courageous guy. Look at things from their point of view and how media portrays them too.
Please don't speak on behalf of all women. Men having sex without emotion or having feelings for women, in general, shouldn't be a concern of yours. Just be concerned with what's going on in your life. It will make your life much easier to handle if you're not taking on the plight of all woman-kind. Now, if it happens to you specifically, it sounds like you need to choose a better quality guy before you choose to sleep with him. If you're one to get emotionally vested in the relationship easily, don't have sex with him so soon. Get to a point where he gets emotionally attached too and you'll have less problems overall.
On another note... lighten up. Sometimes, sex is just sex. Why should it be a guy's burden to take sex as seriously as you do? Why can't you just be more carefree about it? Again, your life would be much easier and stress-free.
Agreed. Women are just as capable of having icy, heartless sex - there are definitely she-harpies out there too. Don't stereotype or generalize. My man loves sex and we're always open and cheerful during, and afterwards, we cuddle and bask in the afterglow. That's a healthy sexual exchange. Sounds like what you have is distinctly unhealthy.
As for women putting in more emotions than men... I was my guy's first, and though I wanted to do the deed months before we did, he wasn't emotionally ready. He was the one who put the stops on it. Judge man by man.
^5 ON THAT ONE!!.....Im so glad I can testify on having a healthy relationship!!When me & my hubby met we were co-workers at 15yrs old.ended up bein bestfriends until he fell in love with my wit & charming good looks!We talked about it & made it official when we were 17 & I REEEEAAAALLY wanted to do "IT" to him but I was a virgin so he wouldnt let me because he said we had to handle it with care incase it didnt work out we could still have a chance to keep our friendship.Well that only made me want him more!He wooed me for a whole nother year after that & I honestly think thats the reason our relationship is still so solid.My baby knew enough at 17 to know we had to start out on solid foundation & for that we've been married for 11yrs with our only problem being that I KEEP FINDING HIS SOCKS UNDER THE BED!!!!....but thats a whole nother show. bottom line is,not all men are as she explained & complained cuz i heart my Hubbs still!.....I wonder if she'll ever realize that the common intrest in all of it is HER. self validation is key.
Right on sista!
I also think it's wrong to assume that all men want is sex. Maybe some of them do because they're too stupid and immature to understand what being a homosapian is all about. They're a different kind of human than a woman, that's for damn sure, but if you're experiencing dudes that just want to plow you and walk away then you're clearly meeting the wrong kind of dudes. Men only respect women who respect themselves. And the ones who don't give a fuck about respecting women are the kind you stay away from. just because you're sleeping with total douchers doesn't mean all men are total douchers. Some women are whores, some are gold diggers. And when men who have been burned by those kind of women say that all women are alike, we get offended. Guys are the same way. Just because Tom and Phil and Lenny made mistakes and hurt you doesn't mean Dominic, Hans and Mark will. They may, though. So take more time to assess. Plus, with holding the goodies is what keeps dudes coming back for more. So if theyre using you for sex and you give it to them, whose fault is that?
Where are Dominic, Hans and Mark hiding out? Sounds like Europe - I should go there.
Aren't we all too stupid and immature to understand what being a homosapien is all about? (Sounds clinical). What it really, really means?
Funny, but I thought men and women were the same kind of human - more or less of one or two elements of chemistry than another. But essentially the same.
Read what Dektora and Mannon said. They have some good points.
Plus, you are very judgemental in your words. Where does that come from?
If you're saying I'm judgemental, I think you're severely twisting my post. I'm trying to give men credit here. Just because I think they're a "different kind of human" doesn't mean I don't consider them humans all the same. Chemically and biologically, not to mention emotionally and physically, men are different from women. You can't deny that, to do so would be completely ludicrous. But essentially, all people want the same things. Some women use men for sex, some men use women. That's a fact. But not ALL men or ALL women do so. The end.
We secretly want all that emotional stuff that women provide, as well. It would be kind of gay to get that from men.
The emotional stuff is something women do want from men. That's what men don't understand, it shows they actually do care about them. Women put more feelings into relationships and that is why we get hurt, yet it's something we can't help.
It's not gay to get that from men, it shows you actually care about us. Its so easy for men to have sex without any emotions, but not for women therefore women get hurt. It's something we can't help though. I wish men could understand that.
Don't get me wrong, I do understand what you're trying to say, but there is a time for those kinds of things. It's not always about the "emotional feedback". Sometimes sex can just be sex. I'm a girl and I honestly believe that.
Is it wrong to feel that way..?
No, it's not wrong. Believing that men are all about the penis and none about the heart while woman are a complete opposite is a very reductive double standard that lacks shades of gray.
I've seen a male friend of mine cry about he got ditch (over the phone, mind you! Cowardise is not reserved to men either) by a woman he had been dating for only 2 weeks. He was emotionally atached, she was in only for the sex.
Both women and men are capable of the best just as much of the worst when it comes to relationship.
Maybe Mander had been hurt in the past recently? I wish you to find a guy that will get emotionnally attached to you, in the future, Mander. They are the vast majority compared to dead stone cold heart only in for the sex.
I probably phrased my point a little ambiguously. What I was getting at was that we men DO want the emotional stuff from women. That's why we date and fall in love, and presumably get married. Women provide us with an emotional outlet we just can't, and really, probably don't want, from other men. You give us deeper emotional support than 'you'll be right', somebody to lavish affection on, and somebody who makes us want to be better people.
Women are awesome, and I wouldn't be the person I am today, for better or worse, without the emotional bonds I've had with them.
But, as Liz below said, sometimes sex is just sex. Not everybody is capable of separating sex and emotion, though (men and women, too), and those of us who are sometimes make the mistake of forgetting that.
Hey I'm lactose intolerant too! Plus I love Call of Duty and mostly everything on that list, so I guess I think more like a guy lol.
Hey I'm lactose intolerant too! Plus I love Call of Duty and mostly everything on that list, so I guess I think more like a guy lol.
Hey I'm lactose intolerant too! Plus I love Call of Duty and mostly everything on that list, so I guess I think more like a guy lol.
I love Chai tea. I make it with regular milk or Lactaid.
I love sex. I also love men. I love that men love to have sex with women. I love that men love to have sex with women who also love to have sex. I love that I have power over men who want to have sex with women who love to have sex with me (or with other women with said men being able to watch/participate). Oh how I love that power.
So it's not just men.
you know something women are in control on when, where, and with who to have sex with well atleast i am so y should we blame men for not being emotionally attached wen you have sex with them? if you dont think hes emotionally attached and you want him to be then dont have sex so soon with him or move on to someone else before u get hurt. women are in control so dont blame him for being who he is. plus sex is fun whether ur emotionally attached or not
Ugh sorry for the multiple post guys. I can't stand my soon to be given away laptop -_-
I can't really blame men. We women are pretty amazing...
It's true. I'm a big fan.
Agreed. Sex is pretty awsome too, so it all makes sense, really.
We are very good looking. Much more so then men. Even gay men admit that.
I've heard gay men say that...I was a little shocked, I will admit!!
I do like this answer though. And it is true, women can be the same way. After a couple of recent unsuccessful relationships, I am totally at the point of only wanting sex. I've discovered that putting effort into relationships and seeing them fail is EXHAUSTING and sometimes you need to just lie down and get some...
Feel free to substitute "lie down" for your preferred position ; )
Yes, I have and yes, it is.
To all the responses people gave me above, I really appreciate it and agree with you all. I just get caught up in the moment sometimes when people say such arrogant things about guys, it makes me focus on those specific types of guys (such as the reformed player). I need to remember to look at the bigger picture. Thanks so much!
To all the responses people gave me above, I really appreciate it and agree with you all. I just get caught up in the moment sometimes when people say such arrogant things about guys, it makes me focus on those specific types of guys (such as the reformed player). I need to remember to look at the bigger picture. Thanks so much!
"Women are amazing. You'd be near singularly obsessed with you if you were a man. Women look pretty, smell nice, and feel real good. They are strong in ways men are weak, smart in ways men are stupid, and frequently, at least in my experience, are apt at reminding me of truths I either chose to ignore or are to proud to accept."
Aww...I'd just like to say, Men are amazing. They're rough and rugged and, well, manly. They may not always be good with the talking about emotional stuff, but they know how to hold us and just be there when we're falling apart. And a compliment from a man will will always affect us more than that same compliment from our girl friends. ;)
If you've got nothing more to offer other than three orifices and a decent frame to go along with it, then that's all we want. But if you're sweet and nice and worthy of our affection, then we will take the whole deluxe package.
You know what you have to offer. Have you been sleeping around and have many guys had a ride? Alright girl, you are the three orifice prize. If not, then maybe there's some hope left.
G-d, American guys bring shame to our entire sex. And I am seeing the same happen in other Anglo countries, but NOT the rest of the world - thank heaven!
You American guys have been so affected and brainwashed by your ultra-feminist culture and man-bashing cinema and television and your "strong" (i.e. loud, opinionated, bitchy, brazen and controlling) women that you've forgotten what masculinity even means, not just sex.
Americans depict men as needing permission from their wives to go out with their mates, as asking their wives for money (like children asking for an allowance), being called their wife's "third son", as being apes thinking of nothing but sex and as being all around big dumb children. It is offensive to men everywhere and not true of most men on this planet, only of Anglo men, because your cultures have cultivated ultra-feminism, even beyond that which we find in Scandinavia, a true egalitarianism where men do NOT hold open doors for women and do NOT help them with heavy bags, do NOT pay for their meals on when on dates; they do nothing for a woman they wouldn't also do for a man. AND they are provided ALL the same rights vis-a-vis divorce and child custody equality, etc.
American women, on the other hand, have their cake and eat it, too! You allow them to be bitches to you, ridicule you and your masculinity, take your money and still force you to pay for their drinks, meals and clothes, divorce you and take 3/4 of your possessions and money even when they've contributed nothing to acquiring them, take your children away from you, attack you and then blame you for "starting it" and then force you to apologise and then watch TV shows depicting you as a childish immature moron, expecting you to laugh. What a life in the US! You wouldn't catch me dead raising children there or getting involved with one of those brainwashed women. But American guys have been brainwashed in an even worse way and I feel terrible for them and the fact they don't even realise it!!
Do you people not realise what message you are sending your sons and young men ?!? Not to mention how you glorify bitchiness in women - do you not see how your next generation of young females are behaving ?!? I spoke to a 20-year-old American male who told me that he loved his girlfriend because "she let him be the man". This is what you are doing, turning your males into ball-less empty shells of men, subjugated to American women's wishes. And American men are already among the kindest most gentle giants I have ever met, which means they are being DOUBLY persecuted. I would not DARE raise children in this country, for fear of raising either a pansy son incapable of leading a family or a bitch daughter whose mouth I'd eventually sew up and whose attitude would need a complete overhaul!
I am tired of Americans hailing women as sympathetic angelic creatures while men are hostile unfeeling brutes. In my experience, WOMEN are devilish manipulative self-absorbed "firestarters" who instigate most conflict. Have you seen how women treat each other?? Or compete for attention (especially from men)? Cruel and evil, backstabbing and vicious, viper-tongued and cut-throat. They even plot and scheme beforehand, whereas male reactions are spur of the moment and reactionary, which is why they are short-lived and easily overcome once the energy has been released; compare intentional 1st-degree malice aforethought murder to accidental manslaughter!
Furthermore, women hurt clearly and intentionally, whereas men hurt by accident and and are generally extremely sorry immediately afterwards, as the anger is not planned. Cf. Notice how a boyfriend will come apologising to his wife, pleading and obviously hurt just moments after blurting out something which has clearly hurt his girlfriend (as judged by her reaction.) On the other hand, see how the girlfriend intentionally searches for the most hurtful thing she can say, the most powerful weapon in her artillery with which to drive her boyfriend into an immediate rage, FULLY cognisant of the effects which her words will engender, knowing that what she does with her mouth will cause him to want to something with his fists. She knows that men do NOT fight with words, but that we can be annoyed by them all the same, especially when she knows precisely which buttons to push. She then deliberately fires away, with a flagrant disregard for the boyfriend's feelings, emotions and well-being and with a clear aim to kill.
We are the ones who are always trying to avoid conflict (when sober), trying to make everyone feel comfortable. We are the first to offer assistance, It is MEN (who are
On top of all this, we behave instinctively, rendering our
I have never known men to treat each otherMen tend to only lose their cool when they have been drinking, that I admit.
Furthermore, I am beyond fed up with the plethora of American female comments that men never mature and that men are just little boys. The fact that we enjoy life, enjoy playing and having fun, enjoy sports and rough and tumble playing, games and physical leisure activities throughout our life is NOT evidence of immaturity; it is an indicator of our fervour and zeal for life which, thankfully, does not dissipate over time as we age. And why should it? It is a characteristic of male behaviour, not of a child's behaviour. It is women who learn to suppress their instincts and who would like you American men to believe that you are children, for it is far more logical to take more physical exercise (and release the subsequent endorphins and other pleasure-causing chemicals) and to smile, laugh and enjoy life, enjoy the physical contact and rolling around with one's children and grand-children than to sit around taking no exercise (save exercising one's vocal chords) and remaining distanced from your beloved little ones. Is it no wonder that men (i.e. fathers, grandfathers, etc.) are associated with fun, playtime and joyous memories and that women are associated with nagging? We also display better signs of mental and intelligence and emotional maturity. I posit, for example, that girlfriends and wives display temper tantrums worthy of any toddler - does that in itself make them immature??
Men tend to be more creative, instinctively intuitive and pragmatic and intelligently expressive. As such, there is plenty going on in our brains beyond a sex obsession; how is it, otherwise, that all of history's greatest inventors, thinkers and doers, writers, philosophers, clerics, teachers, scientists, creators, politicians, artists, leaders, etc etc etc have been men?? It is clear that we find time in our larger brains more active brains to advance humanity ever further, especially when not subjected to such asinine ultra-feminist ideology!
Your culture has not brought about egalitarianism for the sexes, but has actually reversed the situation so that American men are now controlled by their female counterparts. It is disgusting and pathetic - I would rather they call themselves Anglomen so as not to confuse them with the rest of us males who have proudly elected to retain our scrota!
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