Say, "I want to this for my health," and then do it if you want. Does it really matter if he supports it? To me this falls squarely under the heading of Things That Would Be Nice To Have But Aren't Mandatory For Your Happiness.
It's your body, your decision. He doesn't have to support it. He doesn't even have to understand it--not that the issue is particularly complicated. I wouldn't waste any more time trying to explain or justify your decision. If he doesn't support vegetarianism, fine, he doesn't have to be a vegetarian. It's not like you're trying to force it on him, right? Then he has no right to force his will on you.
I don't see why it matters to him. You go out to eat dinner, he orders a pork chop and you order stuffed eggplant and salad. What's the problem? He should be glad you're trying to take care of yourself.
You don't need his approval. Do what feels right to you.
Thanks for the question.
I don't see how this is an issue? I mean I can honestly say that I've never chastized my wife for ordering a vegetarian dish. I've never looked down on someone for chosing something vegan over something veal.
However, if by "support it" you mean that he too should be come a vegetarian and that you ban all meat products from your presence, then you're going to be in for a rough go at it.
That's happening with a guy at work. He's been hunting for like 30 years, loves a good BBQ, his steak, and good venison. Recently his wife became a vegetarian, which he's fine with - he's one of the more health conscious of us at work. But his wife is also insisting he show his "support" by not only stop eating any meat, but also giving up hunting and fishing, his favorite hobbies. He tells us they are practically arguing everyday and her nagging grows worse each day. They're probably going split because he refuses to give up something he's done since a kid and long before he met his wife.
Non issue...
He's probably, very, concerned you intend to push him into being into being a vegetarian. I see it all the time; so many women who are or adopt vegetarianism feel its their divine right to make their men become vegetarians. They pressure their man and insist all meat be removed.
Just don't be that woman. Tell him, reassure him, you won't try to change him. Because, you no more have the right to dictate or control his eating habits than he does yours.
Now, if he still has a problem with your vegetarianism, then that's his problem, he needs to grow up or you need to move on.
Your life, your body, do what makes you happy. But like Neil said if by support you want him to not eat meat too, then no he shouldn't have to support you.
Unfortunately, I can understand why her boyfriend is resistant to her decision. When you radically change how you eat, it becomes something of a minor obsession. You like talking about what you've learned, new recipes and the like. When I started eating healthier I started to talk about it too, which irritated my best friend so much that she blew up at me and we haven't talked in months. I wish she had been honest when I'd asked her if she minded talking about it...
He's probably worried that this will consume her life. And it will, a little bit. It's not really so simple as her choosing a salad. She has to worry about getting enough protein in diet, remaining healthy. I don't assume they go out to eat every night so inevitably he will have to eat what she's cooking. It could easily become a fight of why she didn't make a meat side for him or why he doesn't go make it himself, ect., ect. Cooking two separate meals just isn't practical for many couples.
Of course, I'm probably exaggerating, but I've seen the effect food has on people and it's a lot more powerful than you might think. Life would be better for the both of them if they come to a better understanding than "I'm doing it because of my health and if you don't like it; tough."
If merely changing to healthier eating can cause this much contention between people who are only friends, imagine the potential for conflict a much different change could cause between lovers. You didn't exggerate, if anything you understated it.
Yeah, she don't need his support or approval and he can't control what she eats, but its a two way street, she needs to respect his choices too, and that'll probably be to still eat meat.
If it's a health thing and not a moral thing she shouldn't have trouble cooking him meat (if she's cooking for him), trust me I've cooked for friends, it's not that hard to cook meat in the same seasoning or marinade that you cook your meat substitute (eggplant, tofu, veggie mix, whatever) in, so it all still goes with the rest of the meal. Just cook the vegetarian stuff first, so you don't get meat juice on it. Besides, there are plenty of vegitarian and vegan dishes that you wouldn't even notice that thy didn't contain dairy, esp if you grilled a bit of chicken to go on top. You don't have to cook completely separate meals. My mother has cooked tuna, steak, a pork chop, and tofu to go over the same pasta dish, and it took her no longer than normal. I usually just cook my entre separately, and the same meat for everyone else, but I'm just pointing out that switching out entres doesn't have to be difficult (especially with a versatile spice rub and a griddle!!!)
Chipotle, or some other Mexican flavors, in a rub is pretty great for versatility. Not everything I cook is Mexican (though I grew up in Texas, so I won't claim that I don't cook a lot of Mexican) but for an easy way to switch out entrees it's a great way to go. I mean people already cook steak and chicken fajitas together, there's not much you can't cook in those flavors. Also a lemon sauce. Lemony chicken, tuna, and tofu over pasta. There are ways to keep it from being that big of a deal. And I must reiterate the value of a griddle, You can throw just about anything on one, and then put it over your bed of rice or pasta, or vegetable stir fry, or light summer salad. Same meals, just different toppers. If that doesn't satisfy everyone, then it's hopeless, because that's a about as much a compromise as humanly possible. It worked pretty well in my home growing up, and its how I do things as an adult, so it's pretty tried and true.
I'm vegan and my boyfriend is vegetarian. He does it for moral reasons, I do it because I have a lot of digestive issues and just about everything upsets my stomach. He doesn't point out that I eat vegan but wear fur, and shows his support by keeping soy milk in his fridge for my cereal. I don't point out that supporting the dairy industry is just about as bad as the meat industry, and rather entwined with it, and when ever I make veggie enchiladas I put real cheddar on his. We both do what we need to to live with our bodies and consciences. He is also wonderful enough not to complain about soy cheese pizza, I always offer to throw a cheese pizza in the oven with mine, but he usually just grabs a slice of soy.