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I've been talking to this guy for the last 6 weeks, and about a week ago he tells me he wants to be with me. I replied by saying "Let's see what happens." In the last few days he has not been calling at night, even though we text & talk throughout the day. What's up with that?

He's not calling because you kind of blew him off. "Let's see what happens" might be your way of saying you want to get to know him better and see if feelings develop. But "let's see what happens" is also a nice way of saying "maybe."  The feelings are already there for him-- he put himself out there, and you pretty much shut him down. Understandably, he's starting to lose interest.

Clearly you have some feelings for him, considering that the fact that he suddenly took you off speed dial bothers you. If you like him, but are wary about jumping into something right away, definitely let him know. Reassure him that you like him, but you need a little more time. On the other hand, if you don't have feelings for him, you need to say so immediately. Six weeks seems like a reasonable amount of time to determine whether or not you're attracted to someone. He wants to be with you, but you aren't ready. That's fair. But you can't fault him for suddenly pulling back and not lavishing attention on you 24/7.

Also, no offense, but you seem to be asking a lot of a guy who put his heart out there only to have it mildly trampled on. Clearly, he's still interested if he's texting you throughout the day. But do you really expect him to call you every night, even after you've already told him that you want to wait and see how things play out between you guys? Look at it from his perspective: "Let's see what happens" can mean nothing will happen. Maybe not being available all the time is his way of trying to move on. Throw the guy a bone here. (No pun intended.) Are you interested in him or not? 'Cause your actions say yes, even if your mouth says, "let's see what happens."

Now is the time to declare your feelings before he moves on to someone else. If you aren't sure how you feel, tell him. But the longer you string him along, the fewer phone calls you'll get.
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5 Comments

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I understand where's she's coming from. She's leary of him coming on too strong, too fast. She wants to take things slowly, and there's nothing wrong with that. The guy may be doing all of the things Nick suggests. He may also be playing the old "absence makes the heart grow fonder" game. Regardless, if she likes him, she should tell him -- but that she just wants to take things slowly. If she is leaning more towards not liking him, then she should leave it at texting.

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Something similar happened to me and I completely understand how she's feeling....but how can she know if he's actually into her or if he was just smooth talking his way in?

user-pic

i had sometime like that happen to me too ..put i said we can still be friends we continue to text each other for a liltle but then one day he just stop i was piss for a sec then i realize i'm actually happy for him. he move on real fast i actually he was just a player and good thing i never bought into his stupid game ..thank G for big brothers and guy friends.
but it was fun

Caitlin

He is saying that the ball is in your court. If you want anything more to happen, it's your turn to make the effort... he's done that already.

user-pic

So, you're treating this guy as if he was a phone sex number. No intentions of ever 'being with him'. Well, he probably got something out of it too. Pass the lube!

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