There are many differing opinions on who should pay on the first date and future dates. Some think the man should pay, while others think that sort of thinking is outdated. Some people prefer to go dutch, while others trade off when it comes to picking up the check.
With long-distance relationships, he may feel obligated to pay if you’re coming to visit him or you paid your way there. You’re not only his girlfriend, but his guest, so if he wants to pay let him treat you. Maybe offer to get a meal or movie ticket or beer here and there. He shouldn’t feel obligated to pay, and if it makes you feel uncomfortable that he’s paying for everything, then tell him you want to treat him to something.
The key is to not add another complication to the relationship. LDR’s are hard enough without the added pressure of who is going to pay. There’s already the added cost of the relationship (phone bills, travel expenses), so you don’t want to add anything that will put more strain on the relationship. Better to discuss up front (“I’m flattered you want to pay for everything, but please let me help…”) so you don’t put any extra stress on the relationship and can enjoy your time together.
Who should pay on the first date?