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Mixed Signals. In person he talks a lot,but on IM he practically ignores me. When we are together, he says he wants to spend lots of time with me. But when I say I'm free, he says he's busy. Doesn't even ask me what time I'm free. He got me a thoughtful Xmas present. Is he into me or not? FYI We haven't had sex yet.

From what it sounds like, he is and he isn't. I know, another mixed signal. What it ultimately sounds like is that he's interested, but just not that interested. Not at this point. He's interested just enough to do what it takes to keep you guessing and sending in questions like this to guys you've never met.

At the same time, he's not ready to truly devote time, attention, and affections your way because he is off doing other things (and possibly people). Which makes me glad that you haven't had sex yet because if you had I get the impression he might be more ghost than Casper at a haunted house.

If we've said it once, we've said it a million times: if a guy is interested in you - really, truly interested - he will go out of his way to spend as much time as possible. If I were you, I'd not spend too much time worrying about this guy.

But a funny thing just might happen. If you start to fade him out, he just may start showing up more and more and trying to get into your good graces and requesting your time.

The lesson here? Men suck.

And the church said, "yay-men."

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5 Comments

Jlove

I agree with Panama stop replying to his texts and calls. Start dating other guys and letting this one know that you're seeing other people/really busy. He'll let you know how he feels, ie he'll let you know how he feels and make it official or realize he's not feeling you that much. Either way you win, you get the by you want or you stop waisting time on someone who's not that interested and find someone who is. Just be prepared in case he's not interested and moves on. Good luck girl and remember don't make someone a priority when they only make you an option.

Panama Jackson

"Good luck girl and remember don't make someone a priority when they only make you an option. "

More relationship travesties could be avoided if people followed that one simple rule right there. Sage words.

user-pic

Honestly, it sounds like he is only trying to "keep you in reserve". Just giving you enough attention to string you along. Cut the string.

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I've been in this situation before. I knew that he was afraid of commitment, but I realized that I couldn't use that as a justification for his hot/cold behavior anymore. No one deserves to be strung along like that, whether the person stringing you along is doing it intentionally or not. You have to do what's best for you, which is to end it. It's incredibly difficult to do, trust me, I know. I really liked said guy (more than I've ever liked anyone else), but I had to look out for myself. Self preservation is most important. There are guys out there who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Don't settle for a selfish and immature douchebag. Good luck, girl!

user-pic

I recommend you read the book "Why Men Love Bitches" by Sherry Argov. No, it's not ACTUALLY telling you to be a bitch or any of the stereotypes. It puts things in plain words and tells a woman how to carry herself. Have a look at it at least. This dude is playing games and it just shows you how to handle them correctly. It's great advice, I swear by it.

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